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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169
Apprentice
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Apprentice
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169 |
Hi Everyone, Here is a song I wrote dealing with binge drinking. http://www.box.net/shared/26a2j5934nThe words are: A new age is dawning or so we are told But I don't care if we never get old We can change our ways by reversing the trend But do all good things have to come to an end We can retrace our steps from where we came But nothing can ever be exactly the same We've had our fun and we want to have more More binging and drinking on the dance floor Hey there what do you say I say Hey there what do you say We can do what we want to do We can do what we want to do Lets get together and run with the flow We'll follow each other wherever we go Move faster and faster keep the beat tight How can it be wrong when it feels so right We can keep moving forwards, walk the high wire In our hearts the sparks will change to fire And the fire will blaze and shine day and night The sky is the limit as we fly high as a kite No going back, no reversing the trend We don't want this life to come to an end We've had our fun and we want to have more More binging and drinking on the dance floor Hey there what do you say I say Hey there what do you say We can do what we want to do We can do what we want to do We can stay together and run with the flow Keep following each other wherever we go Move faster and faster keep the beat tight How can it be wrong when it feels so right Glaciers melting and the sea level rising We keep together, no slipping and sliding We've had our fun and we want to have more More binging and drinking on the dance floor Hey there what do you say I say Hey there what do you say We can do what we want to do We do what we want to do We can float high in our own clouds of bliss There's no running away, away from this We binge and drink both day and night How can it be wrong when it feels so right Comments much appreciated. Thanks for listening Jim
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 14,576
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 14,576 |
Hi Jim. I'm surprised nobody has commented on this good song. There are a few things that need to be done with it.
1. You might try running your voice throught the TCHelicon's pitch corrector. There are a few flat spots. Not bad tho'.
2. You might add some harmony in places.
3. Use the PG 10 band EQ and knock the bottom off. Usually the 1st 2 sliders at the bottom and the 3rd one ½ way.
Other than that it's a really good song. Gets my thumbs up for music and lyrics.
Russ Anyday above ground is a good day Computer is Hp Pavillion Vision 6 Ghz quad core AMD processor 8 Gig memory 1 TB hard drive 6 GB hard drive Windows 7 Premium Loose nut behind the keyboard 
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Joined: Jun 2006
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 74 |
Jim -
Nice tune. I agree with Russ' comments, especially the pitch correction.
One other thing - you might want to change the name. Feels So Right was a bit hit for Alabama in the eighties. Google it.
Keep makin' music!
Jon
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Apprentice
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Apprentice
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169 |
Hi Russ, Thank for your suggestions. I tried to do the things you suggested and the revised version is http://www.box.net/shared/g5c7ooy1mpI used melodyne plugin for pitch correction - I use mac Also added some harmony Reduced bottom as suggested If you have time I would like to know what you think now. Thanks again for your suggestions Jim
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169 |
Hi Jon,
Thanks for your kind comments and I did the changes as Russ suggested.
I think I will rename it as you suggested - may be I will use "It feels so right".
I will google and check out the Alabama one - never heard it. I think same name is okay but better to have different name.
Thanks again
Jim
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,199
Expert
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Expert
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,199 |
Hi Jim, What a difference from your first effort. I feel it has come alive. There are a couple of things that I will comment on (I don't usually comment - as I am not that proficient myself  ) In the line : Quote:
And the fire will blaze and shine day and night
The sky is the limit as we fly high as a kite
I thought if you changed to this it would help you.
And the fire will blaze and shine day and night
The sky is the limit we fly high as a kite
The last verse is a little off time with your vocal (at the beginning)
Please don't take offense as I am only trying to be helpful.
Best regards
Michee
Windows 11 64 bit, Biab 2024 1111, Realband 2024
i7 Desktop Computer 16Gb Memory
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Apprentice
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169 |
Hi Michee, Thanks for your comments and pleased you liked it. Yes good suggestion about lyric change - I could also use "The sky's the limit as we fly high as a kite Either would make it easier to sing I updated the version to http://www.box.net/shared/5o2u903xmpto correct vocal timing in very last part. This timing seems to have crept in from using the melodyne plugin for pitch correction so I took it off for this part as their were no problems with pitch. I think it is improved in this new version. I also called the song "It feels so right" to take account of what jon said. Thanks Michee for listening and commenting - much appreciated. Jim
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 516
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 516 |
Hey Jim,
I liked listening to you song. This song feels right indeed :-) Well done!
Cheers
Superbron
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Posts: 169 |
Hi Superbron,
Thanks for listening and I am pleased you liked it. Your comments much appreciated.
Jim
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,286
Veteran
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Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,286 |
Jim, this has all of the ingredients to be a super song. It has great backing tracks, great lyrics and your vocals are fantastic. To really nit-pick I did not like the sound of the lead instrument. IMHO it was to “static and nasally” for the rest of the arrangement. Personally if I were to keep that midi file I would choose something like a warm vibraphone with vibrato as the instrument. Again that is just me and others may disagree.
Either way this is a really good song. Super writing!
Principal: Your child always causes trouble in school.
Me: My child causes trouble at home, do I ever call you?
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Posts: 169 |
Hi Mario,
Thanks for your kind comments Mario. Your comments are much appreciated and pleased that you liked the song. I will experiment with your suggestion.
It is good to have your opinion. Thanks again.
Jim
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 68
Enthusiast
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Enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 68 |
Jim,
Greetings from sunny South Africa.
Been listening a few times over the last 24 hrs.
While I agree with some of a few aforementioned posts, I love the song
USEBENZE KAKUHLE. (You've done a great job) This is Xhosa which is a South African language from the Eastern Cape
MOOI SO BOET. ( Well done brother/bru) Afrikaans for *&^^%$^ well done!
Intel® Core™2 Quad Q8400, 2.66 GHz. 4 MB L2 cache 1333 MHz FSB, 8MB DDR3 DRAM. HDs 1320MB Win7 64bit. BB2010.ver 304 Reaper DAW. Melodyne Editor
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Hi plotzie, Thanks for your very kind comments and I am pleased you enjoyed the song. I noticed you listened to the first revised version. I did correct the vocal tuning on a further version - http://www.box.net/shared/5o2u903xmpwhich is the second revised version, Thanks for listening and you nice comments in Xhosa and Africaan, Hope the world cup goes well - I am sure it will be a great event. Best Regards Jim
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