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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169
Apprentice
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Apprentice
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169 |
Here is a song I wrote "Our Love" http://www.box.net/shared/v9cf81qlcsThe words are: Verse 1 We made love in the candle light A kiss, a touch, lost in our love A perfect ending to a perfect night You were my angel from above We remember it all so well Twenty years ago to this day You still have me under your spell Our love not even begun to slip away Chorus In our minds we'll dance together for ever Our hearts they are for ever together It's real, oh yes we know it's real No words can express the way we feel Verse 2 We have witnessed many sorrows A death, so sad, lost a true friend Been uncertain of our tomorrows Seen events come to a tragic end We remember it all so well Twenty years of being together Sharing the joys and fires of hell Our lives as changeable as the weather Chorus Verse 3 We made love in the candle light A kiss, a touch, lost in our love A perfect ending to a perfect night You were my angel from above We grow older as time slips away Remind each other of what has been Of all the worldly events we have seen Our love not even begun to slip away Chorus Verse 4 Guitar Solo We remember it all so well Twenty years ago to this day You still have me under your spell Our love not even begun to slip away Chorus I hope you like it and comments will be much appreciated. Jim
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,199
Expert
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Expert
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,199 |
Hi Jim, Very nice song. You have that songwriting Angel sitting on your shoulder. If I may  ...... I would like you to try something. Could you try the song with the Lyrics swapped. I.E. We made love in the candle light A perfect ending to a perfect night A kiss, a touch, lost in our love You were my angel from above Twenty years ago to this day Our love not even begun to slip away We remember it all so well You still have me under your spell Just thought it flowed easier.... Hope you don't mind as I am just saying  Best regards Michee
Windows 11 64 bit, Biab 2024 1111, Realband 2024
i7 Desktop Computer 16Gb Memory
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Apprentice
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169 |
Hi Michee,
Thanks for listening and pleased you liked the song.
I will try that change in order of lines - it doesn't affect the song - interesting thought and thank you.
You always make good suggestions.
Jim
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Joined: Oct 2008
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Veteran
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 20,486 |
Hi Jim,
Thank you for posting this song. It's got a good relaxing feel. I really enjoy an 8-beat at this tempo. I can tell that you really enjoyed singing this one. When you got to the second chorus (1 min 44 secs), your voice really began to sparkle and shine. It was great.
All the best with next one!
Noel
MY SONGS...Audiophile BIAB 2026
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,530
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Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,530 |
Jim, what a great song! I loved the lyrics, the backing tracks and your voice was nice and strong. Super job on that.
To really really really nitpick I didn’t like the guitar solo (what would you expect from a guitarist?). If you’re going to use midi then add some vibrato via the mod wheel on the sustained notes. Hopefully your sound source will allow you to do this. Or ask for a guitarist to play the lead line. I’ll bet every guitarist on this forum would jump at the chance to play on this. I know I would.
The bumper sticker said "I'm a veterinarian, therefore I can drive like an animal".
Suddenly I realized how many proctologists are on the road.
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Joined: May 2008
Posts: 410
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 410 |
Hi Jim.
When I click on your link, I go to "The connection to the server was reset while the page was loading". This also happen when I try to go to things posted by George Nelson. I've googled it but can't come up with much. I'm running xp-firefox. I use no script but that doesn't seem to be the problem. Any ideas?
Later
Jim
I'd be completely happy if I had just one more guitar.
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Apprentice
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169 |
Hi Mario,
I am so pleased you liked the song Mario and thanks for your kind comments.
Yes, a real guitar solo rather than the midi guitar from my digital piano would be great. I agree about the vibrato with mod wheel except I do not have mod wheel on piano - I think I can use one of the pedals as mod wheel though. If you would like me to send you an mp3 without the guitar solo I can - you could make a track of the guitar solo - no pressure and it's fine if you do not want to do it. If you do how do I send you the file? If you send me your email I could email it to you.
Thanks again for your kind comments
Best Regards
Jim
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Joined: Dec 2007
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Apprentice
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 169 |
Hi Jim.
I don't know why that is happening. I use a mac so not familiar with the peculiarities of windows machines. If you send me your email address I can send the mp3 file to you.
May be if you registered with box net - it's free - you would not get this problem.
Thanks for your interest
Jim
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