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Joined: Jun 2005
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I lost my 40 year old very healthy nephew last February to a bizarre ashma attack, it took the coroner until June to issue the death certificate, the regular tox screens and tests didn't show it, lost my father last August and then in the prior three years lost a full band of close friends. A keyboard vocalist, drums, guitar and bass. All had various medical conditions. Gigged with all of them many times in different groups. My father was 87, I can understand that but everybody else, all younger than me. Kind of a weird feeling when I think about it which I try not to. I don't take pride in my good health it's just the luck of the draw, genes, healthy living (yeah, right) whatever. Two good friends who are a few years younger than I am have recently developed debilitating conditions that are only going to get worse while me, healthy as a horse.
No point in trying to make sense of it all, it is what it is and I know my turn will come. The closest family members were my father and my nephew. To lose a wife, a soul mate, that's bad and I haven't had to live through that. It has to be rough and you guys have my sincere condolences.
Bob
Biab/RB latest build, Win 11 Pro, Ryzen 5 5600 G, 512 Gig SSD, 16 Gigs Ram, Steinberg UR22 MkII, Roland Sonic Cell, Kurzweil PC3, Hammond SK1, Korg PA3XPro, Garritan JABB, Hypercanvas, Sampletank 3, more.
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Joined: Sep 2010
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Man, that's rough.
Prayers and and good thoughts.
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Joined: Oct 2008
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Quote:
but I'll take the chance and take the heat.
Most of you know that Pat Marr's wife has terminal cancer. He posted it here. He and I have continued to email as I've been through it and we help each other. She's been admitted into Hospice and not expected to live very long. I just want to ask for prayers or good thoughts for Pat and his wife.
John, how could anybody ever be mad at you? You are a very caring and compassionate human being who looks out for the needs of people around him. The time you spent taking care of your wife, and then your dog is a testimony to the kind of person you are.
Furthermore, your decision to donate the proceeds of your music to benefit animal shelters is another indication of the goodness that you spread so willingly as you pass through this world.
I have to admit, I wasn't planning to make an announcement, but since one has been made, I will finish the story.
My beautiful wife and best friend died today (August 8th, 2012 at noon) in a hospice palliative care facility here in Winston Salem. Although there was great potential for pain due to metastases to the bone, the hospice team is very good at alleviating the symptoms that make patients and their families uncomfortable. For the past several days she has slept peaceably like a little baby. Then, this morning there came an exhale that was never followed by an inhale, and she very quietly escaped the confines of her mortal body.
Ever since her diagnosis about this time last year, she has been an example of the way faith can work in the attitude of one who experiences suffering. I met her in high school, so she had 42 years to teach me how to love and how to trust in God, walking by faith and not by sight. I can only hope her lessons sunk in. We'll see.
Thanks to everybody who responded to John's announcement with expressions of prayer or other kindness. It would probably be appropriate to respond individually to each person, but I have to leave now to fill out paperwork at the funeral home, after which I probably won't feel like posting to the forum.
If a collective THANK YOU can be OK, please accept mine.
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Anonymous
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As I get older and more in touch with my own mortality, these stories touch me more deeply. We have people here who I have never met, will likely never meet, and are just faceless names on a forum, yet the connections seem to transcend human contact. I share the losses of everyone here, and in the most recent case of Ian Fraser, the loss of one of us.
This also stirs up the reflection of how I have not been able to make the marriage thing work for me despite 3 attempts, and how much I envy those of you who were fortunate enough to meet your version of the special someone to share your life with.
I can't even imagine experiencing that kind of bond, much less tha sense of loss when they depart.
Best to you Pat. I will pray for both you and your best friend.
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 236
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 236 |
Pat's post made me cry thinking about my wife, my best friend............
Todd
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Quote:
Pat's post made me cry thinking about my wife, my best friend............
Me too.
Pat I'll be with you in spirit tonight.
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Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 570
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 570 |
Pat so sorry to hear this news. I can't imagine your pain and I will be praying for you to get through this.
I do know with your faith things will be good.
God Bless & take care
Brian
BIAB 2025 Ultrapack- Studio One Pro 7 Windows 11, Mac Mini M4 with Logic Pro 11, Melodyne Studio
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Joined: May 2008
Posts: 368
Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 368 |
Pat:
I'm very sorry for your loss. My thoughts will be with you.
John
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Quote:
I can't even imagine experiencing that kind of bond, much less tha sense of loss when they depart.
But Eddie you do.Your love of animals is just the same. Remember that. There love is pure and non demanding.Being able to love is the reward. Doesn't matter if it's human or animal. Your mission in live appears to be for the animals.
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Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 98
Enthusiast
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Enthusiast
Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 98 |
Pat,
I'm literally at a loss for appropriate words except that you have my deepest sympathy.
Living in The Music City
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Joined: May 2011
Posts: 148
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Apprentice
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 148 |
My deepest sympathies and continued prayers for you and the family.
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Joined: May 2008
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Pat, I'm so sorry, I know you will miss her and your life won't ever be the same. I'm praying the God of all comfort will comfort your heart as you pass through this dark and painful time of grief, loss and sadness. My heart goes out to you.
Also I will take the liberty of speaking for Bob (rsdean) who I'm sure would offer his deepest condolences. His father died Friday and he is with his family this week.
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Joined: Aug 2009
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Pat my deepest sympathy to you; it’s hard to know what to say at times like these, thinking of you here in Ireland.
musiclover
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Joined: Dec 2003
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Joined: Dec 2003
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Pat, you have my deepest sympathy. The passing of your life long lover and best friend must be very hard. You are in my prayers my friend.
Whenever I get something stuck in the back of my throat, I dislodge it by drinking a beer.
It's called the Heineken Maneuver.
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 236
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 236 |
Has anyone heard from Pat? Just hoping that he is doing alright.
Todd
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Joined: Dec 2002
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I too was concerned, but glad to see that he recently added his insight and wit to a thread here in the forum.
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,815
Expert
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Expert
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,815 |
Just read this thread and I offer my sincere condolences. I hope you remember the happy times the most.
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Joined: Jul 2007
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Expert
Joined: Jul 2007
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Win 11 64, Asus Rog Strix z390 mobo, 64 gig RAM, 8700k
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 491
Journeyman
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 491 |
Pat, Just back from a visit, to discover your loss. And like, all your other friends here, I can only offer my deepest sympathy. You know you already have my prayers. Joe G.
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Pat, we all hope you are well. I hope you find peace, and joy again soon. We all experience these times differently. Here is to looking forward to a better time, and world. (Rev 21: 3,4). Your pg family wishes you well.
HP Win 11 12 gig ram, Mac mini Sonoma with 16 gig of ram, BiaB 2025, Realband, Reaper 7, Harrison Mixbus 9 32c , Melodyne 5 editor, Presonus Audiobox 1818VSL, Presonus control app.
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
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