I loved the song. Great mix and great vocal.

I have one small suggestion. I took a composition course once and the teacher would to go over my melodies and tell me to keep them flowing (not to jump all over). He would make us do a graph of our melodies and if they looked like arches that was good. If they looked like steep hills that was bad.

I was thinking of the first line of your chorus. It jumps around a lot. Maybe you could make it better by tightening up the melody line ie- you could just go up one note on that last note of the first line instead of going down a third etc.

Not to take anything away from the song it is very well done.

This has the potential to be a great song.

Last edited by edbulmer; 04/26/09 05:42 AM.

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