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Hi Charlie.
As Noel says, you've got lots of expert advice here, so it's difficult for me to add anything else.
What I can say is that I really liked the song.
I always find that one of the hardest things is deciding when a production is actually finished and there's this temptation to keep adding tracks which don't contribute anything. To me, your song sounds great as it is. Maybe try tweaking the mix a bit in line with some of the previous suggestions, but leave the arrangement alone. Different doesn't always equate to better.
ROG.
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Noel: Thanks for the listen. I can't agree more with you regarding the unselfish and gracious insight and knowledge the forum members are willing to share. It's amazing.
ROG: I appreciate your comments. The good part of the advice and analysis of the forum members so far is that the focus on the parts needing to be tweaked are pretty much agreed to by everyone. Vocals, reverb, the lead solo guitar choice and the mandolin volume level. They all seem to agree with your assessment the foundation, RT's and arrangement leaves an overall impression they like.
Don't anticipate having to make a complete overhaul or rework to reach my goal of finding the missing 'more' I have for this song. But a plan is materializing that will help make this song shine.
Charlie
BIAB 2025:RB 2025, Latest builds: Dell Optiplex 7040 Desktop; Windows-10-64 bit, Intel Core i7-6700 3.4GHz CPU and 16 GB Ram Memory.
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I think the 16th's mando is too busy
for your overall vibe which I like
a lot (and having coexisted for
decades with mandolins in different
bands I do like them - Janice plays
a bit on one).
I have learned from several helpful
folks here that stripping a song
down can often be the answer. Getting
to where there's nothing left to
take away rather than add. FWIW
my last three productions other
than vocals have only been 3-4
tracks.
Another thing, also in the FWIW department,
that I've learned a little about
is mastering software (thanks to
both floyd jane and tommyad).
I don't know where you are with it but
if you aren't using it you would find
that it is amazing how much it can
change the characteristic for a mix -
in both good and bad directions.
Having blathered all that it is really a
great melody and both of us
enjoyed the spin.
J&B
Our albums and singles are on Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon Music, YouTube Music, Pandora and more. If interested search on Janice Merritt. Thanks! Our Videos are here on our website.
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Charlie this is almost perfect. I say almost as I agree with the others about your vocal being pitchy is area. I would use Melodyne as it is the best for pitch correction.
I really like the backing tracks, great job on that!
This is a great song and a little pitch correction would take it over the top for me!
The fitness trainer asked me, "What kind of a squat are you accustomed to doing?" I said, "Diddly."
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Hi J&B. I'm a big fan of mandolins too. A good friend, Jennings Chestnut from Conway, SC was a successful luthier and builder of his own line of mandolins, The Chestnut Mandolin. He was also responsible for bringing a large, successful bluegrass festival each May to Conway. I own a mandolin but can only play a few chords myself.
My intended use for the mandolin in this song was to standout as almost a solo instrument and contrast the staggered drum beats. I may need to audition some other mandolin styles.
I have Studio One Professional which has a Mastering Suite. I had been playing with this track for several days and realized it needs more than just polishing so it was not a candidate to be mastered at this stage.
I agree that Floyd and Tommy are both top notch at making their songs and the songs of folks they help sound very professional and finished. Floyd recently offered a considerable amount of detailed advice and counsel that really turned one of my songs around. There are many here on the forum that I have a great deal of respect for and this is the friendliest and most unselfish group I've come across on the internet.
This song will be reworked in a way I think will keep the sparse foundation and vibe but will hopefully give everyone a better quality performance.
Thanks for listening and commenting.
Charlie
BIAB 2025:RB 2025, Latest builds: Dell Optiplex 7040 Desktop; Windows-10-64 bit, Intel Core i7-6700 3.4GHz CPU and 16 GB Ram Memory.
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Mario D. I'm embarrassed to admit at this point but I used a bit of melodyne on the backing vocals but neglected to do anything with the lead vocal. I'm never pitch perfect but I think the problem this time resulted from me comping two lead vocal tracks into one track. The second track was an attempt to double the vocals which I did poorly and I'm guessing trying to closely follow the first track caused me to go flat in spots and some of the flat notes were comped into lead vocal comp. which was supposed to be the 'best' of both tracks. Well, I guess that didn't happen this time.
I'm glad you enjoyed the song and I have taken in all of the good advice and suggestions from my forum friends and hope to turn this into a passable composition.
Charlie
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I think it totally works as is!! Definitely retro. I think the solo guitar and sparse arrangement are perfect-wouldn't change a thing!! Take care. Greg
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Thanks for checking this out Greg. Appreciate your comments. I've experimented with slide guitars and some other acoustics for the solo but so far, I like the tone of the current one the best.
Charlie
BIAB 2025:RB 2025, Latest builds: Dell Optiplex 7040 Desktop; Windows-10-64 bit, Intel Core i7-6700 3.4GHz CPU and 16 GB Ram Memory.
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there are so many good new songs in the forum right now, I almost hate to bump an older song back to page one and force a newer entry to page 2... but I am anyway. As people keep commenting on the newer songs, it should naturally result in the newer songs floating back to page one.
Anyway, I want to weigh in IN FAVOR of the mandolin, exactly as used. Music is different things to different people. To some, it is a business. To some it is a hobby. To some it is an experiment. To some it may even be a lark.
But at one point or another, all of us approach music at a very grass-roots level where we begin with simple... sometimes primitive... sounds, and combine them into something pleasant. I must admit, you had me the moment I heard the mandolin intro. It struck me as the quintessential simple man's song. An idea spoken in conjunction with a chordal backing. I would have been OK with the song if it had been nothing more than the mandolin and your voice.
I liked the melody and the chord structure. As far as how you put it all together... those are "creative control" choices, and I am content to let the artist make his statement, then decide whether or not it pleases my ears. This DID please my ears.
And regarding the observations about vocal intonation: to me, the naturalness of your presentation enhanced the credibility of a song that I was already hearing as something that made no claim to be a studio production. It raises the question of whether or not more polish makes music better... or does it just make it more marketable?
Some music just needs to be honest, and to me this song was exactly that.
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Pat, you are too kind. You've given a humbling assessment and I am quite grateful you have taken time to listen, critique and revive this song. Thank you for the nice words. As for the mandolin, it totally captured the feel and sound I was looking for.
As for the vocals, there is only so much that can be done there. Think in terms of trying to maintain a 25 year old car driven continuously by a college student and never receiving any TLC or regular maintenance. That's my voice. However, I will admit greater care could have been taken by me to intonation in my cut and pasting between two vocal takes as I only achieved clarity to some words.
This was meant to be a simple, grass-roots level song and that somehow made it through to many here on the forum in spite of my vocal somersaults and mixing anomalies.
The somersaults and anomalies are being examined to see if they can be made to be less distracting to the song, letting the good parts still shine through.
Charlie
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Hi, Charlie !
I missed this during my absence
but now I found it and am glad
I did ! This is absolutely one
of your absolute best if not
the best !!!:)) Just great Charlie !!:))
Cheers
Dani
Last edited by dani48; 11/09/14 02:55 AM.
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Hi Charlie ...
we really enjoyed this. It's a little different but in a good way. The one thing I (Alan) noticed is the rhythm guitar could be noticeably louder. It gets lost in the mix most of the time. I'm of a slightly different opinion than most here about the reverb. It sounds fine to me ... and I try to go easy on the reverb (except Di's vocals ... she INSISTS on more reverb all the time!)
Isn't it amazing how difficult simplicity can be??!! i don't have any good "fixes" like several others have offered ... I'm usually the one who needs the help. Regardless, we thoroughly liked what we heard. Best to you ...
Alan & Di
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Hi Al and Di. Thanks for checking in and your nice comments. Hope you guys are getting along good.
LOL, I just erased a three paragraph true story reply to you about the difficulty of simplicity and how that difficulty affected one of my songs from from a album published many years ago. The point of the story defined the difficulty being able to keep simple, as simple. Embellishment doesn't always work or is necessary. It's funny how things sometimes jog our memories.
Glad you enjoyed the song.
Charlie
BIAB 2025:RB 2025, Latest builds: Dell Optiplex 7040 Desktop; Windows-10-64 bit, Intel Core i7-6700 3.4GHz CPU and 16 GB Ram Memory.
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Thanks for listening and commenting Dani. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Charlie
BIAB 2025:RB 2025, Latest builds: Dell Optiplex 7040 Desktop; Windows-10-64 bit, Intel Core i7-6700 3.4GHz CPU and 16 GB Ram Memory.
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