This song has all the elements to be very good. Collaborations seem to bring the best out of folks and this is no exception. Great collaboration.

I always like the story of one so blindly seeking the ever illusive love and then peek over the very shoulder of unrequited love not knowing it is there. Deb has done a good job taking us there with her lyrics and showing each person's point of view.

You have written a nice melody using good choices of instrumentation. Good elements so far for a good song. I have to take a step back from others regarding the arrangement though. Whereas Deb lyrically takes on a winding journey and each verse builds on the last. She takes us back and forth between her characters point of view. The music uses all the instruments from the very beginning leaving no room to build but rather relies on vocal harmonies, the solo and unusual chord changes for variance. It would be interesting to me to hear a minor remix of the musical arrangement being tweaked some. Maybe bringing the instruments in and out throughout the song, varying the drum pattern and such.

It may have been your intent for the music arrangement to be exactly as it is and if that's so, that one element of the song failed to click with me. I certainly like the song more than dislike it, and others are giving it good reviews so it may just be me. If that's the case, carry on....

I'll be giving it a few more listens and the arrangement may grow on me. ;=)

Charlie

Last edited by c_fogle; 01/27/15 03:12 AM.
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