Dani, my dear friend,

You've got to pull yourself together man! Occasionally the truth gets out - Pat Marr let it slip the last time and I had to go through a big rigmarole of damage control, etc. My species has not adapted too well in society and our immune systems have no defense against extravagant praise, overvaluation of our worth, over-the-top commendations, etc. We appreciate it no end - but the allergic side effect ... Not a pretty sight. We even have a special word in our language do describe these allergic outbreaks: Ewwwww!

When flattery gets too intense or lasts too long, I break out in a rash. And that damn finger? It's just a cheap trick - anyone can do it. As I've gotten older, it has caused me no end of trouble. For instance, last week I was grading papers in the bathtub, as I usually do with a small glass of Kentucky whiskey (Knob Creek). Looking at these exam papers is so stressful that I have to do it under maximum relaxation.

So there I am. In tub. Ready to start grading. The last and final step was - as I usually do - to use my finger to light my cigar. What happened next I will leave to your imagination.

Oh yes, Dani, before I forget, my summer sabbatical starts today. All the folks here have gotten a pretty big dose of me, and I must take care of business with my other job. It's a long trip.

Enjoy the summer and may all the Forum contributors do the same. This warm welcome back was so gratifying.

Later,

Dean