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Originally Posted By: gibson
Noel
Nice song and interesting rhyming scheme which comes into its own when sung.
This of course from a man who doesn't often use rhyme in my songs blush

That rhino looks so sad in your picture, all his dignity totally gone.

A nice contribution

Alyn


Hi Alyn,

It's always good to see "gibson" pop up in a thread. Seems like you bring a smile or two wherever you go! I appreciate the comments. Also, I agree about the picture. Sudan doesn't seem to be enjoying life right at the moment. It's incredible to think that, in this day and age, it's so easy for a race to fade away.

Hopefully our songs will help achieve something in some small way.

All the best,
Noel




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Originally Posted By: big741
Great song, Noel.

I particularly like the chorus. It's kinda stuck in my head now. smile

Thanks for the music,
Dan


Hi Dan,

Thanks for taking time to have a listen.

All the best,
Noel




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Originally Posted By: RichMac
Great song Noel and great delivery on the vocals. Cheers.


Hi Richard,

Thanks for the thumbs up! I'm just hoping that the song will be useful.

All the best,
Noel




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Originally Posted By: RnAM
Hi Noel,

Again a beautiful song and your vocals are outstanding!
Good lyrics too. Let's hope it all turns out for the best.

Rob and Anne-Marie


Hi Rob and Anne-Marie.

Thank you for giving my song a run through. I'm grateful. Like you both, I'm hoping that somehow this will help Josie do what she's doing. The rhino have it pretty rough at the moment.

Regards,
Noel




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Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Very nicely done Noel!! As Floyd said, the chorus really shines. I really love the bridge as well. The melodic shape is excellent. Vocal and arrangement work extremely well and the mix sounds great. Another great rhino song! Take care. Greg


Thanks Greg! It's heartening to read that the song 'worked' for you. My melodies aren't in your league yet, though! Maybe one day... smile

Thanks again,
Noel




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Wow! This is wonderful! The chorus hook, musically and lyrically, is infectious.

That last tag with the additional harmony and then moving back to a solo voice is masterful.

Standing ovation!

Good luck:)




p.s. I do not know the finer points of BiaB, which is why I'm reaching for EZDrummer more and more, since I don't know how to easily control RDs. Thanks for the tips.


My stuff:
https://soundcloud.com/scott-h-olson
https://www.youtube.com/@ScottHOlson

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Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Very nicely done Noel!! As Floyd said, the chorus really shines. I really love the bridge as well. The melodic shape is excellent. Vocal and arrangement work extremely well and the mix sounds great. Another great rhino song! Take care. Greg


+1 Noel. I couldn't say it any better than what Greg already said. And I agree with Alyn about that picture.

PS. I thought I'd already commented on this - I listened and meant to - so thought I already had - sorry. blush

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Originally Posted By: Janice & Bud
Originally Posted By: tommyad
Noel, Very well written. I love the rhyme scheme.
The piano sounds great as does your voice. I like the way the
drums dropped out except the snare during the bridge.
Great mix. Nicely done! Tom


Tom offered a very nice summation and we like what
floyd said about the celebratory feel to the chorus.
That sets this apart a bit. This is a great production
for a great cause that we enjoyed listening to and
we appreciate the info about and photo of the last male
N African white rhino.

Heartfelt all the way.

J&B


Hi Janice and Bud,

Thank you for dropping in and listening. I appreciate your comments. This wouldn't have happened without JosieC and I sincerely thank her for that. She's the one who's been the catalyst. It's such a great cause she's working with and I hope this song might be helpful. There's no doubting that rhino everywhere need as many advocates as they can get.

Regards,
Noel


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Hi David.

Originally Posted By: dcuny
There are a lot of great things in the song, but as Dan noted, the chorus is particularly nice. The build into the final chorus is also quite good.

I like way you structured the song, setting up the story, and then bringing in the listener to the story to "be a bridge."

Good stuff.


Thanks. I appreciate the positive thoughts.

Originally Posted By: dcuny

Such a fearsome beast with those horns at the end of his nose

didn't work for me, perhaps because because any lyric ending with at the end of his nose is problematic.


Interesting. I wonder, would you hear "knows" as problematic? The reason I ask is because I'm curious if it's the sound of the word or the image the word creates that causes the issue.

There are many words that end in an -ose sound that are very useful in lyrics: e.g. suppose, blows, grows, rose, foes, close, etc.

Robert Frost even wrote a short poem based on the -ose sound called The Rose Family.

  • Quote:

    The rose is a rose,
    And was always a rose.
    But now the theory goes
    That the apple's a rose,
    And the pear is, and so's
    The plum, I suppose.
    The dear only knows
    What will next prove a rose.
    You, of course, are a rose--
    But were always a rose.


When you say...

Originally Posted By: dcuny
The transition at 1:00 felt a bit forced.


...I'm not quite sure what you mean by 'forced'. I've listened to this 2-bar transition between the end of the first chorus and the beginning of the second verse a number of times with your comment in mind. The chord progression is sound (I vi ii V) and the music seems to flow well enough. If you have time to shed a little more light on what you mean by this comment, it will help me understand.


As I've said before, your perspective always give me 'food for thought' that makes me see my song a little differently. I find that valuable.

Thank you for again sharing your views.

All the best,
Noel




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Originally Posted By: olemon
Wow! This is wonderful! The chorus hook, musically and lyrically, is infectious.

That last tag with the additional harmony and then moving back to a solo voice is masterful.


Hi Scott,

Thank you for those really kind words. To be honest, it's probably more about 'luck' than being 'masterful'. But, what the heck, 'masterful' sounds better! I'll take it smile

I appreciate your taking the time...

All the best,
Noel




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Originally Posted By: Sundance
Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Very nicely done Noel!! As Floyd said, the chorus really shines. I really love the bridge as well. The melodic shape is excellent. Vocal and arrangement work extremely well and the mix sounds great. Another great rhino song! Take care. Greg


+1 Noel. I couldn't say it any better than what Greg already said. And I agree with Alyn about that picture.


Hi Josie,

Once again, thank you for all the encouragement you bring when you visit any of my threads. I appreciate it a great deal.

I couldn't believe the co-incidence of the newspaper article given that I'd only just finished assembling the song. That's why I had to post it. Sudan really does look like he's had enough.

All the best,
Noel




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