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I got this in an email. Do you think it's legit?
The Starmaker Machine
Are You the Next Big Thing in the Music Business?
Are your songs better than anything you hear on the radio?
Do your friends and family tell you that you are great?
Are you stuck in BFE, far away from New York, L.A. or Nashville?
Do you have a closet full of your music CD's that you can't even give away?
Do you have a message that the world needs to hear?
Are you a star on the internet forums?
Do you have some money?
Then, I would like to introduce you to The Starmaker Machine! We have the knowledge, experience and connections in the music industry to take your musical career to the next level!
Do you want to play packed stadiums to thousands of screaming fans?
We can make that happen!
Do you want gold records hanging on your home studio walls?
We can make that happen!
Do you want to demand only yellow M & M's on your performance rider?
We can make that happen!
Do you want your face on the cover of Rolling Stone?
We can make that happen!
Do you want to hide your vast wealth in offshore accounts while maintaining your "common man" persona?
We can make that happen!
Do you want a herd of groupies waiting for you at the stage door after your shows?
We can make that happen!
You've already tried it your way, and where are you? Still living in Mom's basement, and working at the Crazy Chicken fast food joint? Still shlepping your guitar to the open mics and posting your music on internet forums?
Stop kidding yourself!
To succeed in the music business, you need to be connected. You need the guidance of professionals who are dedicated to your career. People who can get your music to the right people. You need The Starmaker Machine!
Fact: 14,672 new CD's are released to the public every single second!
Fact: .000000012 % of these CD's will make a profit.
Fact: Most music today is pirated or downloaded for free.
Fact: Most musicians live lives of quiet desperation, ending tragically in drug addiction and suicide.
How can you overcome the daunting challenges of the music business? How can you get your music into the hands of millions of new fans? How can you get the money, prestige and women you truly desire?
By signing up for membership in The Starmaker Machine - that's how!
Success is right around the corner. You can feel it. You are the greatest thing to ever hit the music business. You know it. We know it too! With The Starmaker Machine behind you, all your dreams will come true!
What can you expect to get with your membership?
A professional demo of your song, recorded by top level studio pros!
Your own website on the Starmaker Page!
Two guest passes to The Bluebird Cafeteria in Nashville, Tn!
Two round-trip bus tickets to the Annual Starmaker Convention in Swamp Hollow, Arkansas!
Personal mentoring with Buddy Jay, award-winning songwriter of “Love's Done Got Me” and “The Blue Tick Hound Song”!!
Radio airplay on WSVJ in Wheeling, W.V.
Free membership in Broadcast Music Inc.!
Exclusive song critiques by our staff of award-winning songwriters/A & R / Producers!
Starmaker Staff:
Colonel Bob Parker, President.
Bob has scored a number of charting songs in his long illustrious career, most notably: “She Wouldn't Shut Up, So I Shot Her”, and “There's A Fly In My Beer And A Tear In My Eye” - and who could forget the timeless “Barrooms And Spitoons”?
Bob has also had a huge career on tour, opening for acts like Johnny Dolan's Rough Riders, Nancy Higgenbotham, Charlie Duncan and The Brittles! Bob also hosted a popular Radio Show on WDFR in Bugtussel, Ok.
Bob brings all his years of Music Business Business Experience to everything we do here at TSM, and through his guidance, we are growing every day!
Chet Haskins, C.E.O.
Chet is well known as a pioneer in The Music Business Business, having run a myriad of wildly successful websites catering to amateur songwriters and musicians, such as - “Wannabee.com”, “Poseur.com” and his biggest triumph - “YourSong.com”.
Chet knows all the right people, and can get your song to them!
Emongo Mobubu, Nigerian Chapter President.
Emongo is our rep in Africa. We get a TON of airplay for our clients in Africa! The royalties can be difficult to negotiate, but hey – it's airplay!
Chi Chi Monteno, Latin Music Director
Chi Chi began his music career as the Artistic Director at the BoomBoom Room in Detroit, then moved to L.A. to coordinate the 1st Annual Chicano Punk Festival in Culver City, which was headlined by none other than Juan Yuto! (“Maracas and Cucaraches”).
Why wait? Every passing day you slip further into oblivion! You want the fame – the fortune – YOU KNOW YOU DO!
Sign up TODAY!
1 Year Membership : $1500. USD
3 Year Membership : $6000. USD
Payable to:
Colonel Bob Parker
PO Box 2
Happy Trails Motor Court
Muckoluski, OK.
Membership Form:
Name____________________________________________
Address______________________________________
Email _______________________________________
Credit Card # ___________________________
SSN __________________________________
Bank Account Number(s) ______________________________________
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Joined: Aug 2003
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Sounds legit  What convinced me was the mention of Emongo Mobubu, Nigerian Chapter President. After all their bankers seem to be legit in all their transactions and emails, don't they? Seems reasonable at $1500 per year with no guarantee of success. All those questions that they can sort out are covered in my latest song. Although I would like "babes" rather than "cows" as implied by " Do you want a herd of groupies waiting for you at the stage door after your shows?" Alyn
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Hey Alyn,
Yeah, it sounds legit to me too. I'm probably gonna sign up.
BTW - Happy 63 years to HRHQEII!
Regards,
Bob
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HA! HAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! 
Last edited by floyd jane; 09/08/15 06:36 AM. Reason: controlling my laughter
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Wait a minute. Somethings wrong here. Why even offer the year year membership if they can guarantee success with a one year membership?
Okay, I've got it now. The three year membership is for continued success!
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Muckoluski OK., must be a brand new suburb, Google Maps don't even have it yet!
Of course, Muckoluski might be in Nigeria...
BIAB & RB2026 Win.(Audiophile), Windows 10 Pro & Windows 11, Cakewalk Bandlab, Izotope Prod.Bundle, Roland RD-1000, Synthogy Ivory, Session Keys Grand S & Electric R, Kontakt, Focusrite 18i20, KetronSD2, NS40M, Pioneer Active Monitors.
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eddie1261
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eddie1261
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That can't even have been a serious email scam!!!
And WSVJ is in Morristown New Jersey, not Wheeling West Virginia.
Last edited by eddie1261; 09/07/15 12:20 PM.
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Hey, if I can stop working at the Crazy Chicken.....
 Steve BIAB/RB 2022, Pro Tools 2020, Korg N5, JBL LSR 4328 Powered Monitors, AKG/Shure Mics.
PC: Win11 PRO, 4 TB M2 SSD, 2 TB HD, 128 GB Memory
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HA! HAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! You may mock, sir, but these people are at the center of the Music Business Business! 
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Wait a minute. Somethings wrong here. Why even offer the year year membership if they can guarantee success with a one year membership?
Okay, I've got it now. The three year membership is for continued success! Jim- A very astute observation. Everyone wants continued success, right? Regards, Colonel Bob
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Muckoluski OK., must be a brand new suburb, Google Maps don't even have it yet!
Of course, Muckoluski might be in Nigeria...
It's a very small town. Regards, Bob
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That can't even have been a serious email scam!!!
And WSVJ is in Morristown New Jersey, not Wheeling West Virginia. Good catch, Eddie! No flies on you, that's for sure! regards, Bob
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Josie - glad you enjoyed it. Regards Bob
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Hey, if I can stop working at the Crazy Chicken..... Me too. I'm still living in a van down by the river. Regards, Bob
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Clever write, Bob! I'm assuming you wrote it... (the sense of humor contained therein has a familiar ring to it)
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All they need is my CC#, SS# and bank account?
Where do I sign up?
Trax
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Clever write, Bob! I'm assuming you wrote it... (the sense of humor contained therein has a familiar ring to it)
I assert that I have no affiliation with this group, entity or organization. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. Regards, Colonel Bob Parker
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All they need is my CC#, SS# and bank account?
Where do I sign up?
Trax Good deal, eh?
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Expert
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Expert
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I thought that first of April would have been a good date to publish this serious offer.
Desktop; i7-2600k, 8 GB mem., Win 10 Pro, BIAB 2017; RB 2017 - latest build
Laptop: i5-2410M, 4 GB mem, Win 10 Pro, BIAB 2017; RB 2017 - latest build
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
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Band-in-a-Box 2026 for Windows Special Offers End Tomorrow (January 15th, 2026) at 11:59 PM PST!
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Another exciting new addition is the new AI-Notes feature, which can transcribe polyphonic audio into MIDI. You can view the results in notation or play them back as MIDI, and choose whether to process an entire track or focus on specific parts like drums, bass, guitars/piano, or vocals. There's over 100 new features in Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®.
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Season's Greetings!
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Team PG
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