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Originally Posted By: Skyline
You got a good song from the pain Alyn, it's all cool.
John


Thanks John,
hope all is improving your end

Alyn

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We agree with EVERYTHING that's been said.
And, yes, a little Lennon vibe is there BUT you
have a signature sound with your vocals and
RT arrangements. And it is a very well crafted
signature sound...something so many musicians,
including ones of great talent, never develop.

Yep, we like it.

J&B


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Originally Posted By: Janice & Bud
We agree with EVERYTHING that's been said.
And, yes, a little Lennon vibe is there BUT you
have a signature sound with your vocals and
RT arrangements. And it is a very well crafted
signature sound...something so many musicians,
including ones of great talent, never develop.

Yep, we like it.

J&B


Thank you, blush a signature sound is EXACTLY what I have strived for, since I first started writing and then recording all those years ago. BIAB has, without a shadow of doubt, helped develop the musical side.

I initially HATED my voice and covered it with light echo and flanging. I even took singing lessons until the tutor's laughter became too much to beargrin

So glad the both of you like it!

Alyn

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You have made a wise choice to embrace your voice. Your unique approach to instrumentation, and arranging, and lyrics and their delivery and to the whole package is always enjoying to listen to.

Great song!

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Originally Posted By: gruverider
You have made a wise choice to embrace your voice. Your unique approach to instrumentation, and arranging, and lyrics and their delivery and to the whole package is always enjoying to listen to.

Great song!


Thanks Lawrence, so glad you stopped by and enjoyed it!
I do wish I had a different/ better voice but hey I'm stuck with it now. frown


Alyn

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Alyn,

This is really beautiful. Nobody writes outside the oft-spoken-about box like you. The way you have used rhymes verses lack-of-rhymes to drive the flow of these lyrics is outstanding.

I've been listening to a number of songs from Korean melodramas lately. My reason for doing this is that (a) I like much of the music and (b) I don't speak Korean so all I can do is listen for rhyming patterns in consonants and vowels. This seems to be helping me understand the effect rhyme a bit more. Some Korean songwriters, like you, often have a tug of war between rhyming and not rhyming. It's very effective.

Have a listen to the chorus at the below link (0:56)...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMWvZ3dExhA

As I hear the above chorus, and in the broad sense, there's an AAXBBX rhyme pattern. Even though the chorus ends without rhyming, it's very effective. That being said, there is an internal rhyme in the last line of the chorus that does use the final vowel sound. (It's the kind of internal pattern that floyd sometimes employs and it works well.)

But I digress...

I've just had another listen to your song smile It's still excellent.

All the best,
Noel

P.S. Apologies for taking so long to comment on this. I haven't been active in the forum for a little while.


MY SONGS...
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Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson
Really, really nice work Alyn!! This has such a sincere reflective quality, the chord progression is really unique and creative, and everything works. I love the arrangement. You are a master at building the arrangement through the song. The instruments come in so unobtrusively and carry everything a step higher. This is excellent!! Take care. Greg
+1, Alyn, This is so interesting to listen to. The chord progression is really nice, the arrangement is quite good and the vocal is something that only you could pull off. Wonderful work! Tom

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Originally Posted By: Noel96
Alyn,

This is really beautiful. Nobody writes outside the oft-spoken-about box like you. The way you have used rhymes verses lack-of-rhymes to drive the flow of these lyrics is outstanding..................


............ I've just had another listen to your song smile It's still excellent.

All the best,
Noel

P.S. Apologies for taking so long to comment on this. I haven't been active in the forum for a little while.


Good to hear from you Noel,there is no need to apologise, I just hope all is well down your way.
that was an interesting link to a really nice song, and a fascinating dissection by yourself cool

I loved Rapper's Delight by the Sugar Hill gang when that came out and the original version of walk this way and the Run DMC version and strived, sometimes, to make the words match the flow of the song.
I have always said that I try to paint pictures with words and music and sometimes, in my mind, I succeed.

So glad you enjoyed this miserable song blush grin

All the best

Alyn

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Alyn,

Excellent! This is one of my favorites from you - very beautiful.

Bob

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Cheers Tom,

Glad you enjoyed the listen

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: rsdean
Alyn,

Excellent! This is one of my favorites from you - very beautiful.

Bob


thanks Bob,

glad you enjoyed this miserable song laugh

Alyn

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Alyn,
This is really well done. One of your best.
SD

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Thanks for listening and commenting.
Glad you enjoyed

Alyn

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A strong hint of "post-Beatles" Lennon, which I credit particularly to the experimental mix of the vocal and solo guitar in particular. The "didn't expect this chord next!" only adds to the vibe.
Not a shabby place in music to be compared to, if I was sounding ambiguous in my observation there smile

p.s. And most of my songs which I'm never going to post here are far more depressing than this, so obviously the gloom in yours was just another bonus to me wink

Last edited by Icelander; 09/30/15 04:47 PM. Reason: Afterthought addendum

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should!
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Originally Posted By: Icelander
A strong hint of "post-Beatles" Lennon, which I credit particularly to the experimental mix of the vocal and solo guitar in particular. The "didn't expect this chord next!" only adds to the vibe.
Not a shabby place in music to be compared to, if I was sounding ambiguous in my observation there smile

p.s. And most of my songs which I'm never going to post here are far more depressing than this, so obviously the gloom in yours was just another bonus to me wink


What a nice review, Eddie.

Glad you enjoyed my misery LOL

Alyn

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I found that your phrase "I'm drowning myself in your brain" to be very interesting. We all can get so absorbed in things that drowning in them is a very good description of what could be happening to us. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Sonny

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Love that change around 1:33. Cool sad song and arrangement Alyn.

SRP #312508 10/01/15 10:37 PM
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Originally Posted By: SRP
I found that your phrase "I'm drowning myself in your brain" to be very interesting. We all can get so absorbed in things that drowning in them is a very good description of what could be happening to us. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Sonny


I can't remember why I wrote those lines but yes one has to sink or swim from all those hateful comments been thrown at you crazy

Thanks for listening

Alyn

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Originally Posted By: Sundance
Love that change around 1:33. Cool sad song and arrangement Alyn.


That change was thanks to BIAB Chord track and a midi arpeggiator in my DAW and then I went YEH, and did a little dance grin when the drum fill was in time.

Glad you listened and enjoyed.
I hope them pesky rodents have been shown who is "The Boss" grin

take care

Alyn

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Hello Alyn,

A tough subject you've chosen here but the results are very good.
Original, as for lyrics and musical arrangement. Your songs are never boring!
Well done.

Rob & Anne-Marie


We are Rob Meulman and Anne-Marie Bovenkamp from The Netherlands.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1gsdNLE7_Gy8qavoOplQow/videos
http://rnam.net/


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