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Teetotaler vs the Toe Teedler by A. Hugh Jiddyut! I've been a ol teetotaler, all of my life but never found a place, to go lookin for a wife Thought I'd try a bar, and maybe a few drinks so I jumped in my truck, drove down to Thumperdinks Got up my courage, and went into the bar after 6 drinks later, met a girl name of Star She waltzed right on over, and she said to me Hey there gorgeous, are you too good to be? I said that alcohol had never touched my lip it was my first time, and was already lit She asked me what I did, and do you love me honey? I'm a Toe Teedler, but thought I'd made a funny. She yelled out and threw me, there upon on the floor ripped off a boot and pitched it, right through the door then she shoved her foot, smack dab in my kisser then she started sangin, and she told me mister Teedle my Toes…….no body ever Teedled them before Teedle my Toes……. don'tcha stop a Teedling forever more Next thing I remember, was crawling out of bed head was pounding heavy, and wishing I was dead and on my left hand finger was a shiny band of gold grinning right beside me, the first thing I was told Teedle my Toes…….no body ever Teedled them before Teedle my Toes……. don'tcha stop a Teedlin forever more The moral of this story I'm sure you'll all concur It's better to be the Teedlee, than the Teedler if your wife says jump, don't even ask what fer. if she says Teedle me, ya better Teedle her I'll Teedle your Toes…….like no one has Teedled them before I'll Teedle your Toes……. and I won't stop Teedlin forever more and I won't stop a Teedlin that's for shore!!!!! At least let me take my teeth out first…..Dang it I'm Teedlin as FAST as I can!
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Tommy, your songs just keep getting more and more entertaining !
Floyd hit the nail on the head when he compared you to Ray Stevens... you have a real knack for coming up with outrageous concepts and developing them to a clever finished product!
I liked this part of the song:
The moral of this story I'm sure you'll all concur
It's better to be the Teedlee, than the Teedler
if your wife says jump, don't even ask what fer.
if she says Teedle me, ya better Teedle her
if you aren't already performing live for money, you are missing an opportunity... certain audiences would go nuts for this sort of thing!
I'm impressed! I think you are well on your way to developing your own highly recognizable crazy music franchise!
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I'm glad you like it Pat, been re-writin it all week. Mostly on the porch a sangin to my pet hog (Nelly Belle) she runs like heck, when she hears one note. Think A. Hugh Jiddyut is a good Nom de Plume? Say it fast er it don't count! 
Last edited by Tommyc; 04/21/16 06:15 PM.
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Journeyman
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I like it, what is the style you used.
Last edited by dga; 04/21/16 06:21 PM.
"When you help somebody else you are really helping yourself"
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_FIDRHYT.STY Driving Blue grass with Bluegrass Doc 589 Banjo, and 596 Fiddle. Glad you liked it dga! 
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A great laugh!! Thanks you Pat Marr for bringing this side out in Tommy. Keep 'em coming Tommy!! Take care. Greg
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Thanks Greg!!!!! Pat HAS UN-Leashed a Monster! A fat, bald, toothless Monster!!!! So lookout Wurld!!!!
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Tommy
Very clever (and a catchy tune).
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Thanks Peter! Just having BIAB fun!
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
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Last Chance! The Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Mac® Special Ends Today (May 31, 2026) at 11:59pm PDT!
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