Greg and Alan,

What a joy to it is, at a bit after 6:00 am here in Australia, to sit back, to close my eyes and to drift along on the sound of this wonderful song. Everything about this is gentle on the soul and the psyche.



Greg, these lyrics are outstanding. The rhyme scheme is amazing and it guides the listener's ears along seamlessly from thought to thought. When I look closely at these rhymes, I see an ABABCCDDEE rhyme pattern.

But there are some REALLY, REALLY interesting things happening that take the song's lyrics to that much sort after 'next level'.

The first is that the DD rhyme occurs as an internal rhyme in line 7 of each A-section (very nicely done!). This is a very cool moment of lyric acceleration which made my ears pay attention.... an excellent way to set up the hook!

The second thing that I saw was that all the rhymes are perfect rhymes with the exception of the last two lines in each A-section. With these closing couplets, you've chosen to use the less resolute assonance rhyme. Because this rhyme lacks some the closure that perfect rhyme has, the effect is that the final line is left hanging a little. What a stunning choice for making: (a) the title stand out; (b) the listener sit back and reflect on the lyric journey; (c) boost the emotion resonance of the A-sections.

The third thing that stood out to me was how adroitly you've used the design device of 'apostrophe' as the vehicle for these lyrics. When I was listening to these words, in my mind, the singer had a glass of red wine in his right hand and was holding a framed photo of his lost love in his left hand. To me, these lyrics were a one-sided conversation with that photo. This conversation was anchored in self-reflection.

Every way I look at it, this is skillful, skillful, skillful lyric writing. I also marvel at how challenging it must have been to write such heavily rhymed sections and, all the while, maintain a relaxed, conversation style so that the rhymes slip by as perfectly natural. Just....



Alan, your music is stunning. I have never heard AABA form used and arranged any better that what you've created here. The musical journey sails from chord change to chord change with sense and purpose and, all the while, nothing but beautiful melody glides across the sea of harmony. Just wonderful.

All up, it's a definite and resounding...



As I said at the start, what a joy it is to sit back and listen to this music unfold.

All the best to you both,
Noel

MY SONGS...
Audiophile BIAB 2025