Samuel,

This version is very cool but I can hear an alternate. Let me just throw something out as a secondary take that would address what Floyd has outlined as a perspective/point of view issue. It is totally up to you as the artist to make that call though.

If there is a perspective issue, try this:

You could try a second, alternate approach with a simple shift in perspective and keep the metaphor intact. I will just be throwing out ideas, and feel free to keep what sticks.

The music is great, but this might work as a skeleton for "Version 2." (If you are interested in further exploration.)

V1

I miss her cashmere sweater
and the things that she used to say
I miss her sweet love letters
and the....
I miss the...
I miss the records that we used to play
I miss the ...
I miss the...

Pre Chorus

And when I said I couldn't live without her
that's the day that she walked away
And now I'm standing in the rain and miss her
I can't believe that we've been washed way

CH

And every day
I dream of ways to go get her
cause all I have is
yesterday
and as many holes as that
cashmere sweater
the one that she just threw away
just threw away
just threw away

or something like that

I am just typing man.

anyway you can keep mentioning the cashmere sweater but list all the other things you miss, and talk about how much you love the sweater, but she actually threw it away, it means everything to you but nothing to her

I think if you can pull that off it would be absolutely heartbreaking and have major hit potential.

On production, don't go too crazy with all those new toys now.

smile

This song is about mid range and wood ...keep it warm as, well, a cashmere sweater.

Hope that was helpful. Use any of those ideas that are helpful and throw the rest away.

Again, totally love the originality of the original. This could just be a different way to explore the metaphor.

smile

Love your stuff man.