Hey that sounds like my life and the never married no children.
I went through all the facing "death" at a young age with anxiety and fear but after experiencing it, total peace, total love, total knowing, no time as we know it, it's just the opposite, I was out of my body but did come back or sent back, after that you know that "life" is just an optical delusion and you don't buy into it anymore, you loose any materialism and spend all your time helping others though it does totally drain me at times.
And yes music is what's kept me going, if you go watch a ball game you come away happy or disappointed but you go to music concert you come away feeling good, uplifted same with creating it. 20 year ago after all the crap I saw a woman singing on some "CMA Awards" just goes to show what I knew then about country music, but she blew me away, I found out some time after it was Shania and her music and the other country artist healed me and got me grounded back down here.
Anyway I'll get back to it.
So hopefully we will hear back from you soon, but if not we will catch up with you some other time and place for sure.