Originally Posted By: Birchwood
Ai Ray, that came in, but that's what this forum is for. Giving feedback.
And yes, I hesistated about that choir as well, as I said in one of my posts before.
But the majority found it nice, even your friend Misha.

I didn't hear that crack you mentioned. I'll check it later again. Today I've heard the song too much.
And abouth my upward swing I hadn't noticed till you mentioned it. I was more busy with getting the two recordings of my voice align properly.
And yes, these lines were false rhymes, but because of the speed of singing I chose to do it like I did. Otherwise the words would sound too made up.

Thanks for your remarks, but read what Bob Dean has to say ;-) (this is a joke)
But thanks Bob!

Bye,
Hans

Hello Bob,
Hello Hans,
I offered so much commentary because the song is good and your progress has been rapid. I want you to remember to take time to consider things and make the most of the songs.
False rhymes are popular and work really well in most instances - most writers use them.
The "crack" is a quirk of compression or voice or both and it may be that my headphones ad sound card contributed to it but, to my ears, it was there so worth mentioning. I do reckon that you should sing "safe" rather than "save" as it is a false rhyme that will work in terms of syntax.
Most people on the forum are kind, generous and benevolent. Most folk on the forum want to present their stuff to be listened to and enjoyed. sadly I've spent time on forums that have trained me to listen critically and to offer constructive commentary before offering praise - ying and yang packages I suppose.
I've been told to leave off or go away by a few people who don't want any commentary and I've done just that for those individuals. Decades of writing reports on academic and social progress have instilled in me the use and value of the General Comment Sandwich.
You are doing fab work, I simply think you could do even more so.
Nah, I'm also a curmudgeon - but rarely actually cranky.

Last edited by rayc; 05/03/19 03:43 PM.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe