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Originally Posted By: VideoTrack
I really like the way you captured the darkness of the underlying theme.
Interesting chord progressions that worked well to further exemplify the story being delivered.
Moreover, the ending certainly indicated that there is 'no end in sight' for the situation.
Definitely well portrayed.

Thanks Videotrack,
The narrative came into my scone almost fully formed.
It was a quick scrawl to get it down.
the chords were inspired by the cheapo spring reverb pedal mentioned. Certain chords ring through well, some choke and otters get muddy so the tool was the sorting hat!


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rayc
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Originally Posted By: Jim
Good lyrics from you & Stephen Smith...
Dark but good...
And I genuinely enjoyed the chord progression on this piece...
I believe It heightened the melodic structure & lyrics of your song...
All in all a very nice collaboration,

Jim.
Thanks very much. Simple chord shapes (in this instance A, F, G, E followed by Em G, C, Am A) are all I'm capable of really.


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rayc
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Originally Posted By: Teletwanger
Great song. Great performance. Reminds me of Ziggy Stardust era Bowie. Excellent.

Thanks teletwanger,
Nice to have an aural reference like that!


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rayc
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Originally Posted By: jptjptjpt
Big sound. Very Ziggy, which is very cool. Great use of BIAB as a foundation. BIAB is a great tool. Great instrumentation that you added too. Excellent mix.
I like it!

Thanks jptX3,
It is an excellent tool indeed.
Gettin' jiggy with Ziggy eh?
Ta!


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rayc
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Originally Posted By: Janice & Bud
The title certainly begs the question of how a narcissist could gain a wife smile
I must confess that even given my background in clinical psychology I can't figure it out!
The write is brilliant. The message creatively comes across with just the right
amount of subtlety.
The fine instrumental and vocal performances are wrapped up in another of
your room filling mixes...outstanding.
We enjoyed it and look forward to the next version...
J&B

Abusive relationships seem to be very complex interactions that outsiders like me see as B & W.
Feeding needs/isolation/fear/self worth/ and so many other things, as you know, congeal.
A couple of people have opined that this is a narrative about the president and his spouse but a casual reading shows the lyric ascribes an external self control that he who shall not be named does not possess.
The new mix is in the OP with a choice of solos - I'd appreciate your opinion as to which serves the song best.


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rayc
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Ray,
Very cool write! Seems it took quite some time to produce this, and got to tell you, it came out great! Musical bed is rich and full of surprises. I like a more pronounced Eric Drabwell guitar on it. Lyrical phrasing is very tricky on this and Stephen worked this out very skillfully. Vocals have a very distinct dimension. If I was the one to mix, I would leave them just the way they are and would not try to put them "deeper" into the mix. I liked the version on the second link.

Thank you for sharing!

Misha.

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Wow - what a unique and captivating tune. I loved the delivery, and the differences in each chorus kept it refreshing the whole way through. You captured a dark vibe really well, and it flows miraculously well. Really nice lyricism too.

I wouldn't change a thing on this one - thanks for sharing smile


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Originally Posted By: floyd jane
ray,

What an INTERESTING write!

The tracks form a perfect bed for the lyric and melody.

A really good mix. Everything blends well. A treat for the ear.

fj


Agreed!! Very interesting and clever!! I would bring the lead vocal a db or 2 louder.....it is very well performed! This reminds me a bit of The Wall. Very cool!!! Take care. Greg

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Originally Posted By: Rustyspoon#
Ray,
Very cool write! Seems it took quite some time to produce this, and got to tell you, it came out great! Musical bed is rich and full of surprises. I like a more pronounced Eric Drabwell guitar on it. Lyrical phrasing is very tricky on this and Stephen worked this out very skillfully. Vocals have a very distinct dimension. If I was the one to mix, I would leave them just the way they are and would not try to put them "deeper" into the mix. I liked the version on the second link.
Thank you for sharing!
Misha.

You are, as always, very kind Misha, thank you!
Yeah, I think I'm OK with the vocal level on this.
There's a new mix with a combo of cello & guitar up now.


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Originally Posted By: Deryk - PG Music
Wow - what a unique and captivating tune. I loved the delivery, and the differences in each chorus kept it refreshing the whole way through. You captured a dark vibe really well, and it flows miraculously well. Really nice lyricism too.
I wouldn't change a thing on this one - thanks for sharing smile

Thanks Deryk,
unfortunately I have made a change though - combo solo!


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Originally Posted By: Greg Johnson

Agreed!! Very interesting and clever!! I would bring the lead vocal a db or 2 louder.....it is very well performed! This reminds me a bit of The Wall. Very cool!!! Take care. Greg

Thanks Greg, you're generous as always.


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Ray,

This is very unique and captivating... Love your creativity.

Very well done.

Bob

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This is a very cool song Love the chord changes. Vocalist is also very good . Well done


Scott Collingwood
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Ray,

I listened to the last link, with the cello et al. . . . pretty brilliant tune. Love the complexity of the melody and the vocal is delivered with emotion and just the right prosody. From a production standpoint—and it may just be me—the vocal seems a bit back behind the music . . . or muted slightly . . . not sure how to describe it . . . maybe too compressed? Anyway, maybe just a bit crisper? Again, just one guy’s opinion—it’s such a great vocal and to me some of the nuance gets lost. Food for thought if nothing else.

But just an impressive tune. Wow!

Hope all is well with you.

Deej

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Originally Posted By: rayc
Originally Posted By: Janice & Bud
The title certainly begs the question of how a narcissist could gain a wife smile
I must confess that even given my background in clinical psychology I can't figure it out!
The write is brilliant. The message creatively comes across with just the right
amount of subtlety.
The fine instrumental and vocal performances are wrapped up in another of
your room filling mixes...outstanding.
We enjoyed it and look forward to the next version...
J&B

Abusive relationships seem to be very complex interactions that outsiders like me see as B & W.
Feeding needs/isolation/fear/self worth/ and so many other things, as you know, congeal.
A couple of people have opined that this is a narrative about the president and his spouse but a casual reading shows the lyric ascribes an external self control that he who shall not be named does not possess.
The new mix is in the OP with a choice of solos - I'd appreciate your opinion as to which serves the song best.


Well stated re the abusive relationships. Tom posted a song he and Janice wrote about spousal abuse a couple of years ago. Tough subject. And, yes, the "shall not be named" is totally bereft of self control.

We just kicked back and listened to all three on the monitors. We favor the combo mix. You did a great job with the compression on the cello. Often it seems that a cello in a mix tends to muddy things up with a droning sound. Your's cuts and adds to the production. Guitar is very cool.

Enjoyed the comparos and appreciate the effort you put into them.

J&B

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Hi Ray,

I'm a bit late getting to this one. I'm glad you've still got it posted on Soundcloud.

I found this mesmerising to listen to. The backing is excellent. You've created a bed of sound that induces a feeling of oppression and danger that matches the lyrics so very well.

You are remarkably creative in all you do. I seriously admire your talent!

All the best,
Noel


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