Hello James,

At the start of your song it looked as if voice appears from out of the fog. That was a nice effect! Don't know if you made it do so, or it just happens. The song is very nice and it seems that you are a man of few words, looking at your lyrics.
There is one thing I missed in this song. A kind of surprise or something like that. Without this your song became a bit predictable.
You have an instrumental section, maybe in that part you can transpose your song? Than you sing your last chorusses a bit higher. But this is how I would deal with these things. If that doesn't suit you, don't bother.

Hans


Hans Berkhout
(Birchwood)
https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130