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Excellent write Floyd (and Reid). The band you've assembled sounds great, as of course do you and Janice. A real shame it wasn't picked up by Tanya Tucker or one of the hats. Bob mentioned Dwight Yoakam - I can totally hear him doing it.
Regards,
Leon

Thanks, Herb...




Thanks, Derochette. Janice always takes things to a new level.

Darn good stuff. Shame they didn't pick it up. Excellent vocal performances.

Your production sounds like an authentic band.

Thanks for the nice comments, Peter...




Thanks, Dave. Like I said, having Janice join me on this was a no-brainer...just the right touch...

FJ/Reid & Janice,
Wow, this is different and unexpected. Fun tune! Cool opening. Excellent rhyming with all these stops. Excellent vocals from both of you. Easy listening, airy backing. Goes in very well. Mix is nice and crisp. Would be interesting to hear original ver. too.
Thank you for sharing.

Misha.

Not Honky Tonk, not Brownsville but a whole lot of both...the honey trap in the 1st two lines is like a jag hook.

Hi floyd,

Another masterpiece! And as others have already said, there’s nothing that sounds dated about this at all. It’s still rings fresh to the ears.

Your work is always superb. This is no exception. Your band is a perfect fit. You and Reid Richmond have written a really fine song. And the cream in this cup of coffee is the best backup (and lead) singer I know. Janice’s vocals never fail to work magic Everything about this is a credit to all involved.

The chorus intrigued me! I love, love, love that triple rhyme in line 3 (strung it out/hung it out) and then paralleled using two syllables in line 6 ([un]fair to/there to). This is sophisticated lyric writing by every measure (no pun intended).

That’s when I thought I’d better analyse your chorus. As you know, you’ve been inspirational for me when it comes to lyrics and it’s been a while since I’ve seriously analysed any of your work. I’ve discovered that if I want to enhance my own writing ability, I need to understand how it’s done by competent people such as yourself.

So let’s go...

I’ve colour-coded the rhymes and I’ve looked at the rhyme scheme and the poetic meter (that is, the number of stressed syllables in a line). And putting everything together, I created the table below. Yellow and green end-of-line rhymes are used to separate the first section from the second section with it's gray and blue end-of-line rhymes.





This is what stands out to me at first glance…

► Lines 7 and 9 don’t rhyme but there is a strong connection of consonance through “s” and “m”. Also the “o” sound in “promised” is close to the “u” sound in “something”. So, while there’s not a strict rhyme between these two words, there is definitely some sonic paste that glues them together a bit.

► By and large, the lines scan as 3, 4 and 5 feet (strong syllables). Moreover, there is a kind of symmetry in how the meter flows (e.g. 4-4-5, 4-4-5, 4-3, 4-3). Then the last line stands all by itself—lonely—with just two strong/stressed syllables. This is a powerful way to isolate that last line and shine lots of sonic spotlights on it. It’s also the eleventh line and it interrupts the laid back flow of symmetrical lyrics. All this make it 100% perfect for the title!

► Moving from 4-4-5, 4-4-5 meter to 4-3, 4-3 meter brings some lyric acceleration. When I say the lyrics aloud, I can feel this. This makes the words give a feeling of speeding up as they head into the last line.

► It’s interesting that the chorus is also book-ended in that the first three words and the last three words are identical. Nice!

This is excellent material to understand and deconstructing it has been very valuable for me.

I didn’t stop with the above. But I shan’t bore you with adding what followed into this post. If you want to discover where I went next, after thinking about the above, it’s on the below pdf file.

Here’s the link…

Continued on this pdf (Link)...

All the best and thank you! I'm really, really grateful for all the guidance that your work has provided me over the years.

Noel

I can see why there was interest in this, it's a winner1
Too bad they couldn't make it happen.............yet.

moto

It would be the same for lines eight and ten of your matrix: "back" and "that" have a strong "a" which carries the day rather than a strict rhyme. It reads well enough and "RIGHT".

Thanks, James. "Seamless" - that is a good description of Janice's harmonies on this...




HA! If you find that malleable time, let me know...I've been looking...

Peter and Dave

Thanks for the harmony comments!

Janice

As stated many time, very clever write. Timeless subject, ages well (actually doesn't age at all), and the backing is fresh. I am always intrigued by songs that have a "down" subject with a very upbeat melody and backing. It fascinates me how well that works. I have written several like that, myself.

Thia is really great, in every way. The words are very well placed. The band is hot. And your vocals, as well as your musical-sister's spot on harmonies make for a very nice listen!

Steve

Hi Floyd,

Foot-tapping good. You can dance to it as well - a good workout.

Absolutely classic Floyd all the way through.

Great performances and a wonderful "live" sounding mix.

Proper job.

ROG.

Thanks, Eric!




Really appreciate that, Scott...

Delightful write, arrangement, production and performance. This was right in the bullseye for what I recall of 90's hits. For me, this song sounds like it would fit into the wheelhouse of the Oak Ridge Boys during that time period unless the band was wanting to move into another direction and this one was too close to their current work.

No matter, the 90's came and went without it but fortunately for us, it's still a winner today. As always, you and Janet sound great together. Enjoyed my listen.

Thanks, Mr. Snyder...




Well...if your music cannot provide a harrowing experience, what good is it?

Thanks, Marty!...

M17, David S., Robert, JPT & Leon,

Thanks y’all for mentioning my small part on floyd’s wonderful song!

Janice

Thanks for the nice comments, Robert...




Thanks, jpt3...

Trev - always appreciate you dropping in... thanks!




Thanks, TM. It was always nice (sometimes exciting) to have a song put on hold - regardless of how long (or short) - but it was/is a very crowded market. There are literally hundreds of thousand of songs on the shelves in Nashville that no one will ever hear...and they ALL sound like hits...

Thanks, Leon!!!




Appreciate that, Scott....




Thanks, Misha. The original demo was, of course, done in Nashville - top studio and top studio musicians...Reid actually did the vocals. The only copy that I have found is a very worn cassette tape and the sound does not do it justice. If I can find a better copy, I'll see about adding it to the thread...