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Hi everyone,

I wanted to make a bit a different song where the piano is in lead. It even starts with it...
And then I continue with the vocals and some other instruments. The SoundCloud link:
https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130/how-the-dice-fall?si=0aee54ec3a5a446cb03d1c7cbef2e768

I hope you like it, but I'm interested in what you really think of it.
I made it, because when I was young I really had those dreams of falling off a wall and then -in my dreams-learned how to fly. I still like that part!

Hans
=========================================
The Lyrics
How the dice fall
(c) HWBerkhout, 26/09/21

V
I took my heart in my hands
And I stared at that worn out thing
There is some love  inside it
Though for years no one came in

R
In early dreams I was falling
Allways from a wall
I never got me answers
About the meaning of it all

V
I had my heart in my hands
And I stared at that worn out thing
There is some love inside it
Though I let no one in

R
Now I have dreams about nothing
Only falling from a wall
But I won't be moaning
About the meaning of it all

=Solo=
V
I have my life in my hands
And I stared at my worn out soul
There is some crying inside it
A child, I can see through a hole

R
But I have dreams about nothing
Only falling from a wall
I learned some living and to understand
How the dice may fall

Still I have dreams about nothing
Only from that wall
I learned some living and to comprehend
How the dice must fall

=bridge=

V
But I ignored the child in my soul
Weeping on a wall
I was the one I neglected
That's how the dice really fall
===========================================
The instruments and other stuff:
Style: PBallads, Key: G (BiaB)
Bas, 3467Drums, ModernPopBallad 16thPiano 1 (1006) Symphony
Piano 2 (chorus) 3670
Me: composition, lyrics, vocals and keyboard for Strings (Sunset Strings, Realivox) and Drop sounds (Piano Colors from Native instruments)

Last edited by Birchwood; 10/06/21 01:27 AM.

Hans Berkhout
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https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130
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Lovely intro Hans. Just loved the lyric. Super vocal. Backtrack was very cool. Excellent choice of instrumentation. Well done...


Scott Collingwood
https://soundcloud.com/scottt709
https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
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Hans,

This is a really nice progression along with a lovely melody and narrative.

at the 0.17/8 point there's a very rough edit within BIAB of the piano chords...it's happens a coupe of times more after that one.
It's often difficult to over come but would be worth the effort as a) it's pretty naked in the intro and b) the progression is really nice.

Your vocal is still a little harsh in spots, as mentioned some time ago, but not off-putting.

Nice package, the strings add their sweetness well.
Good work!


Cheers
rayc
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I really like this one. Super job with that piano and the chord progression. The lyrics are top notch for sure and your vocal was very good, as was your mix.

It was very refreshing hearing a piano as the main instrument. Extra praise for that!

Thumbs up.


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Liked the emotion in your singing, it made the song for me. Good lyrics. I felt the piano solo was a little sparse, but it was short, so no big deal. Good work!


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Oh, yeah. Flying In Dreams. A lot of us did/do that. It's interesting to ask folks their method and there are a lot of them. WOW! I typed that while the song was cuing, and I was preparing to tell you what I REALLY think of it. Then it started playing and, man, it hit me. Had to stop it and start it over.

I REALLY think this song is outstanding in melody, lyrics, vocal and band, and the mix is perfect. It is so well developed and so emotional. Your vocal is your best. Those strings are so well arranged and played. When you asked how I really felt, I really wanted to give you the tongue-in-cheek response, but the song kept my tongue in check. Man, Hans, I gave it 3 spins so far, and still think it's one of the best songs. Really!


Enjoy whatever happens!
marty

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A great write.
The instruments fill the space and the vocal dances across the top.

I can tell this has some deep meaning to you, it shows in your passionate delivery.

Don't change a thing.

moto

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Gorgeous classic hit ballad! Very emotional lyrics and the way you interpret is very heartfelt.
I really like how you make heart and soul something tangible. And how the story (and the person) progress with small steps to the revealing end.
Lovely piano, it truly shows the beauty of the chord progression and supports the strong melody. Strings complete the masterpiece. Drop sounds work nicely.
Perfect fit for the darkening autumn days.

Janne


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Hi Hans,

This is an excellent song - music and lyrics.

I particularly like your vocals - lots of passion.

Best Regards
Nigel


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Hans.
A lovely production with excellent vocals . I very much enjoyed this. Well done.
regards
Gary.

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Hans,

A very good write. Both lyric and melody are good.

I like the production. I agree with Ray about the piano. It's a great choice, but there are a few "glitches" to the track. And the vocal is a "bit too crisp" in places (there is more high-EQ than you need). It IS well sung!!

An excellent song.

fj

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"I had my heart in my hands
And I stared at that worn out thing
There is some love inside it
Though I let no one in"

"But I ignored the child in my soul
Weeping on a wall
I was the one I neglected
That's how the dice really fall'

A few of our favorite lines ... great write.

John Lennon is back! We love this, Hans. The piano is lovely, as are the strings and the dramatic arrangement is powerful to go along with the powerful lyric. You are a master at dynamics.

And the mix sounds fine on our monitors.

Well produced in all aspects!

J&B


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This is very nice. Your vocals are the star of this show. Wonderful. Great lyrics. Then band isn't too bad either, especially that piano player.


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One of your best I think, Hans!

Love the melody and chord progression, and great vocal.

Well done!

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Hi Scott, Ray, Mario and TuneMonger,

Thanks a lot for listening and your reply on my song. I appreciate that very much.

I feared the song might have been a bit too dramatic, but after reading the posts I admit I was wrong on that.

Originally Posted By: Scott C
Lovely intro Hans. Just loved the lyric. Super vocal. Backtrack was very cool. Excellent choice of instrumentation. Well done...


Hi Scott, thanks! Especially about the lyrics.

Originally Posted By: rayc
Hans,
This is a really nice progression along with a lovely melody and narrative.
at the 0.17/8 point there's a very rough edit within BIAB of the piano chords...it's happens a coupe of times more after that one.
It's often difficult to over come but would be worth the effort as a) it's pretty naked in the intro and b) the progression is really nice.
Your vocal is still a little harsh in spots, as mentioned some time ago, but not off-putting.

Nice package, the strings add their sweetness well.
Good work!


Hi Ray, thanks as well for your nice comment, also on the narrative. After your post I had changed the song a bit. I renewed the singing part and I rendered the first piano a couple of times to get what it is now. But beside the renewing of the piano I didn't hear what you wrote about it. Floyd also mentioned some glitches in the pianotrack, while he listened to the newer version. So they still have to be in it. But I don't hear any of this, nor did I read complains about it from others. On the contrary, some said to leave it as it is. And that is how I feel about it too. Also about that 'naked' part...
But keep telling me what I can improve in my songs. I need that information.

Originally Posted By: MarioD
I really like this one. Super job with that piano and the chord progression. The lyrics are top notch for sure and your vocal was very good, as was your mix.
It was very refreshing hearing a piano as the main instrument. Extra praise for that!
Thumbs up.


Hi Mario, what a nice comment! And what a wonderful mark I got on the lyrics. Thanks!

Originally Posted By: TuneMonger
Liked the emotion in your singing, it made the song for me. Good lyrics. I felt the piano solo was a little sparse, but it was short, so no big deal. Good work!


Hello TuneMonger, Thanks for these nice words and the qualification of the lyrics! I think you've heard the first version of the song, in the second version the piano wasn't sparse (in my opinion). So, I listened :-)

I hope you all have a nice weekend,
Hans


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Hans

A really emotive and well sung ballad.

Nice lyric and impressive use of the piano and percussion.

A very good song.

Peter

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Hans,

I love a piano song . . . and this one is pretty darn sweet. At 45 seconds, I’m wondering whether the intro is a bit too long, but once the song kicks in it takes off. So perhaps fine as is. The vocal is stellar, crisp and magnetic. The melody on the chorus sticks the ear well. Like the strings behind the piano—just the right touch. A compelling emotion to this piece that resonates. Impressive work!

All my best to you,

Deej

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Hans.
nice piano and lyrics mate.
i like it when you push yuour vocs.

nice ending .
happiness.
om


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Hi Hans,

You've really done a great job, here. Piano is my instrument and it always makes me feel comfortable when I listen to it.

As I listened, I closed my eyes and simply let your singing and the music drift around me. There's nothing I'd change.

Another fine addition to your ever-growing collection!

All the best,
Noel


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Hans,
I believe you achieved your goal. Nice piano lead ballad. Good use, not overly busy synths. Liked that sub bass synth. Good fit. Solid set of lyrics. Zero complaints on your vocals, which in my opinion were pretty good and mix is clear. Easy listen.
Thank you for sharing.

Misha.

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