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Interesting tune, good work. Song structure needs attention... Define your verses & choruses, using A & B Drums parts... Vocal phrasing could be smoothed out a bit in places... keep at it.
Bandcamp Win-11; BiaB-2026 Audiophile (latest version)
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Journeyman
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Your voice doesn't suck as bad as you imply in the other forum topic. I have heard people playing in a bar that couldn't carry a tune in a bucket. You just need to keep at it and practice, work on phrasing as Bloc-head said.
Keep it up!
My wife asked if I had seen the dog bowl. I told her I didn't even know he could.
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Thanks! I might actually try to learn to use Cakewalk I've had for 9 months.
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Thank you. I'll read up on those things and try to implement. I think YOUTUBE will be my friend in the learning process.
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Yeah, it's not a terrible voice as you implied in other threads.
I do think some kind of tuning plugin would help a bit; you know the pitch and can sing it, but sometimes not nailing it. Practice would help more in the long run, especially by practicing and then listening back after, to see how close you actually sang it compared to how you heard it in your head.
Note what you hear (in writing if needed) and try again. Doing this a couple dozen times will likely help quite a bit. Same for phrasing, as mentioned above.
I've been handed worse and managed to make it work, so just keep at it until you are happy with it.
FWIW that will likely never happen, it is common/normal to not ever be totally satisfied with your own performance. <grin>
I do not work here, but the benefits are still awesome
Make your sound your own!
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Hey Blong,
Welcome to the forum.
Your voice is actually good. Nice timbre. Very pleasing. When you get into vocal processing (Ozone etc.) be careful not to over do it or you will ruin the natural warmth of your vocal chords and make it all too harsh. Easy does it.
So, you have the tools, your voice is fine, even pleasing, so no worries. Now just write and produce 100 or more songs his year.
You will only learn by doing. But have no fear. Full speed ahead man.
Good job.
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Expert
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Expert
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Man, I was disappointed! I was expecting some really horrible vocals, but your singing is fine. =8^)
Not strong, of course, as you know. But when I listen, I hear an OK singer who could probably get pretty good, especially if he's writing his own material. No need for robotic support and I don't think autotune is needed either.
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Man, I was disappointed! I was expecting some really horrible vocals, but your singing is fine. =8^)
Not strong, of course, as you know. But when I listen, I hear an OK singer who could probably get pretty good, especially if he's writing his own material. No need for robotic support and I don't think autotune is needed either. I agree. You do have a good voice. I would bring it up a tad. I think is an excellent first song and with a little polish it would be a winner.
Life is short so make sure you spend as much time as possible on the Internet arguing with strangers.
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Refreshing to hear that. Thank you!
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I guess no one told me it would be easy, so I'll work harder. Thank you.
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I'll work on a brighter tone. I appreciate the feedback.
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Good song...good/fun narrative.
As mentioned, the sound of your voice is good you just need to hit the notes a little more accurately.
The native tuner in REAPER - ReaTune - is good and easy to use...it's easy to be subtle with it as the user set the rate of change from 250 as slow and almost passive to 5 which hits beyond Cher territory. It'll do it automatically if you set the key and are close enough to the notes though I'd recommend tracking and them adjusting the notes manually.
The solo tone is awful I thought.
Good stuff.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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I thought the song premise was brilliant, I got a real kick out of it. Nice job on that one.
Singing is tough, most of us can't do it the way we'd like. Sounds like you have a good ceiling if you work at it some. Keep working on it, and work on defining your verses and choruses as bloc-head said. You can add instruments and more voices (in time) to make your chorus pop.
Last edited by TuneMonger; 01/16/22 04:17 PM.
Windows 11, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 2i2, Sony Acid Music Studio 10, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
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Love this, Blong --the whole story-- AND your vocal. Perfect. Excellent lyrics. There are so many to quote, but I'll settle with "polishing his wood." Danny O day been rotting away. Love your style, man. Man, so cool. Please, if it's easy enough for you, post the lyrics. Well done!!
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Ok BLONG, when I saw "90% true story of me losing my girlfriend to her ventriloquist dummy.", I couldn't resist hitting play on this! Great job and nothing wrong with those vocals! Keep up the great work! Thanks, Torrey
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OK, that's a different sort of song.  As others have said, make sure you don't bury your vocals behind reverb, and try to keep the energy strong through the singing. But not so loud that it becomes harsh and off-pitch... that's my speciality! Amusing write. 
-- David Cuny My virtual singer development blogVocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?BiaB 2025 | Windows 11 | Reaper | Way too many VSTis.
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Danny O'Day took my girl away
He could produce wood on demand and I couldn't
Danny O'Day could perform in every way
I asked my girl to hold me like that but she wouldn't
Local talent contest my band would win, there was no doubt
We left them begging for more with our cover of "Twist & Shout"
Then my girlfriend took the stage a wooden dummy on her lap
I had to stifle my laughter and stay until the end and clap.
Imagine my surprise when my girl took home first prize
And gave all the credit to her new companion
From that moment on I would swear she was full of lies
She said it was her new partner who was the real champion
Night after night she devoted to polishing his wood
She claimed by doing that he began to grow
They started sleeping together because it felt so good
She would come to school with her face all aglow
Danny O'Day that dummy took my girl away
He could produce wood on demand and I couldn't (though I tried)
Danny O'Day performed in every way
I told my girl to treat me like that but she wouldn't
I said, "Your acting like that makes you look like a fool.
You can't come to class with your hair full of wood chips
Or carry in your purse what looks like a wood-working tool
And you're embarrassing yourself with wood polish on your lips."
But Danny O'Day took my girl away
He could provide wood on demand and I couldn't.
I finally had enough of those lonely sleepless nights
And hoped my girl would recover from a case of termites
So Danny O’day began rotting away
I know I did wrong and I shouldn’t.
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A very pleasant song!!! Nicely arranged, and yes sung well too!! Good use of BIAB!! Take care. Greg
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Welcome to the forum. Really liked the vocal. Like any skill the more you play and sing the better you get. This is a really cool song. Look forward to hearing more tunes from you. Well done
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