Hi, Rob.

Sorry if this comes off as harsh. It's well written, produced and sung, but - by design, it appears - the narrative of the story doesn't go anywhere for me.

      Born to be a prom queen

Yep, POV is not clear at all.

Does anyone refer to the television as a "tube" anymore? That sounded a bit dated. The same with "sorry state", "No sirree", "muck" and "Now I was born, it seems..."

Lots of incel vibes to this already. The only redeeming line is:

      Now I was born, it seems, to be a lonely guy
      So I can't blame her existence No sirree

I have no sympathy for the narrator. He's basically repeating the same thing over, but there's no build, or reason. He's just fixated on a girl because she's pretty.

      Oh, I wanted that girl so bad
      That for years my life's been muck

Does he mean that his life is terrible because he's in a constant state of wanting? He just stays locked in his room in emotional pain because he's not married to the prom queen?

Or is he blaming the all the bad things in his life on the fact that she doesn't belong to him?

Either way, creepy mission accomplished! wink

For me, it just doesn't make a compelling narrative. But I'm not sure of your goal with the song, so it might be right on target for what you're trying to do.

-- David Cuny
My virtual singer development blog

Vocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?