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#724627 07/19/22 07:27 AM
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No Longer With Me

I'm not too sure about this one - so, over to you :-) Thanks for listening and for any comments!

EDIT: link changed on 23 July 2022, after making some improvements suggested in your feedback - thank you.


LYRICS:

And I wake up in the morning
Realising I'm alone,
And it's been ever so long since
You've been gone ...

And I go visit the music site
Where some writers wrote a song
About love and life and friendships,
Marriages that last so long ...

Such beautiful songs ... such beautiful songs ...

And I want to write a classic,
A love song, for you and me,
Then I look around, remembering
You're no longer here, you see.

And I want to sing out loud
About all that we once were ...
And yet everything I'm left with are
Memories of yesteryear ...

Do you still care?
Do you still care?

There's the country star that writes
Stunning songs in voice so deep;
There's the rocker, there's the crooner,
They could write songs in their sleep.

And I want so bad to have
The kind of love they sing about ...
I remember what we had
And I wonder, full of doubt ...

Has all we had ... just turned to naught?

***

And I want to sing out loud
About all that we once were ...
And yet everything I'm left with are
Memories of yesteryear ...

And I want to write a classic,
A love song, for you and me,
Then I look around, remembering
You're no longer here, you see ...

No longer with me.


****** Song Summary *************
Title: No Longer With Me - 17 July 2022
File:No Longer With Me - Take 2 - 17 July 2022.SGU
Key=F , Tempo 70, Length (m:s)=3:59
No intro. 66 bar chorus, from bar 1 to bar 66. Repeat x1 chorus
No Melody
Soloist track has 285 notes, Soloist harmony is < no harmony >(0)
Song is saved with Volume, Pan, Reverb, Chorus, Bank0,
Style is _RUEFUL.STY (Rueful Country Soul Ballad)

RealTracks in style: 4020:Bass, Electric, ModernCountry16ths Ev16 075
RealTracks in style: ~688:Organ, B3, Background Pop Ev 065
RealTracks in style: 803:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm DrivingCountryBalladClean Ev 065
RealTracks in style: ~~369:Pedal Steel, Background Ev 065
RealDrums in style:NashvilleBrushesBalladPushEv16: a: Sidestick, Brushes b: Brushes

*******************

Last edited by musician17; 07/22/22 10:04 PM.
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James,

Sad lyrics that express the longing for the joy that others have. A lot of pain expressed that many could relate to! Great job with the backtrack! I liked it and the only thing I would do if it were my track would be to put a touch of reverb on that sax solo...but hey, that's just me! Good work!

Thanks, Torrey




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Nice one James. There's a lot of feeling to this song. I like the music you chose here too. I agree with Torrey that a bit of reverb on the sax may give it an even better sound.

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James,

A clever write.
I like the way the guitar works in the BAND.

The vocal is slightly boom-y.
Otherwise, the mix is good.

fj

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You Sir, are a lyricist. Nicely done on the song.

I'd love to hear you sing something rather than just spoken word.

Regarding the mix.... backing tracks are good.

Since the lyrics are the star and focal point of this work.....they should be easier to hear and understand. I think if you were to roll off the mids and lower frequencies a bit to allow the spoken word to be more easily heard without the mud on the lower freqs, they will sit on and in the mix a bit more clearly.

Just my 2 cents


You can find my music at:
www.herbhartley.com
Add nothing that adds nothing to the music.
You can make excuses or you can make progress but not both.

The magic you are looking for is in the work you are avoiding.
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Thank you all so much for your so kind feedback. I've made some EQ changes on the voice track, and also put some reverb on the background track, including the sax, so hopefully it should sound a little better, now? Here's the new link: https://amazingradio.com/profile/jamesdelsono/tunes/12087823-0a6c-44a1-b738-278e0de9a35f (I've changed it above, too).

Thank you again, all, so much for listening and commenting. I'm a little behind on listening to your tracks, again ... argh. I will listen either tonight (Saturday night) or tomorrow (Sunday). Thanks for your patience!

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Hi James
Cool song
The background track is really good
If there would be a sung chorus now it would be an absolute top song
Wouldn't that be an idea for the future ? A collaboration ? You with your chanting and a singer for the chorus ?
That would be really cool
But also so good work James
Many greetings
Andi ;-)

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Actually, I think this is one of your best so far James! I think your voice is very effective here and the arrangement/style sounds great.

Agreed, the saxophone could use a tiny bit of delay (no additional reverb). But that's just a small nit.

Rob


We are Rob Meulman and Anne-Marie Bovenkamp from The Netherlands.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1gsdNLE7_Gy8qavoOplQow/videos
http://rnam.net/


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Cool lyric James. The guitar was a neat add to the song. I am with Herb would love to hear more of your singing voice as well. Really well done


Scott Collingwood
https://soundcloud.com/scottt709
https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
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Thank you, Andi, Rob and Scott. So nice of all of you to listen and comment.

I'm a little behind on listening to everyone on the forum (life getting in the way, as usual) ... but should be back soon!

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The lyrics really hit me, excellent description of sadness and harsh reality for a songwriter, very easy to relate to, good counterbalance for those love songs mentioned. Very nice soulful band, the country guitar nicely introduced, the bass plays beautifully at the end and sax is always good choice to express melancholy. I like the emotion in your spoken vocal, still this is such a great song that I would love to hear this sung with a melody.

Janne


Hear My Music:

Soundcloud
YouTube

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