|
Log in to post
|
Print Thread |
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,931
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,931 |
THIS SONG IS REMOVED
RealTracks in style: ~518:Bass, Electric, Pop HalfNotes Ev 085
RealTracks in style: ~542:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm Dreamy Ev 085
RealTracks in style: ~362:Guitar, Acoustic, Strumming Ev 085
RealTracks in song: 2692:Organ, Rhythm ModernPopSlowMike Ev 075
RealTracks in song: 2337:Violin, Background, PopHigh Ev 085 (1TrackStringSection)
RealDrums [in style:NashvilleEven8^1-a:Sidestick, HiHat , b:Snare, Ride
Sam Efford of fivrr sang the vocal.
Lyric:
I've always heard
Look into your heart
The truth is there
That may be so
I don't really know
Or even care
I lost a love, suffered the sting
But here's the intriguing thing:
Every time I look into my heart
I find that she is living there
It may not be real but it's nothing I conceal
From anyone who cares.
All I ever wanted since the day we met
Was to have her for my very own
Oh, Never leave my heart, sweet illusion, don't leave me alone
Maybe I should take the blow and face the loss,
Can't be the guy who lives on lies
But as long as both our paths, sometimes cross
That's all I need to keep my dream alive
Violin Solo
Find somebody else
Friends they often say
Don't be a fool
Hard to fix your gaze
On a cheap array of glass
When you've seen a jewel
Someday she may find that special one,
Will I then, at last become undone?
Every time I look into my heart
I find that she is living there
It may not be real but it's nothing I conceal
From anyone who cares.
All I ever wanted since the day we met
Was to have her for my very own
Oh, Never leave my heart, sweet illusion, don't leave me alone
Last edited by TuneMonger; 01/07/23 07:32 AM.
Windows 11, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 2i2, Sony Acid Music Studio 10, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 7,170
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 7,170 |
I think Sam's 1st note, or three, is a bit iffy.
The vocal is a little loud or may need some more reverb to sit with the instruments/room.
Some sibilant stuff - not bad but there're spots I'd address.
Nice arrangement and the violin was a good solo choice.
The last cymbal hit cuts off suddenly...a little delay or cut n drag extension would be nice.
Last edited by rayc; 01/05/23 01:26 PM.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,045
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,045 |
I agree about the vocal volume and adding some effects.
I liked the vocal and the violin lead - brilliant!
Super backing tracks.
Great lyrics!
I'm in a fitness protection program. I'm been hiding from exercise.
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 8,172
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 8,172 |
Super vocal and lyric TM. I think this is an excellent tune. Super laid back listen. Well done..
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8,021
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8,021 |
OK, Rob... But remember that you asked! Plus, everyone else seems to disagree with me, so take a giant grain of salt.  I agree with your " meh". There's no energy, the song is too slow, and there are long gaps between lyrics. The singer's got no passion in the vocal, but that's partly because there's no feelings in the song, other than that the singer "wanted" to "have her". But there's no emotion to it, just analysis. The words that are used are cliches that don't sound like an actual broken-hearted person would say, such as: suffered the sting
at last become undone
But here's the intriguing thing
Hard to fix your gazeThe beginning of the song says you should look in your heart to find the truth. Or not: I've always heard / Look into your heart / The truth is there
That may be so / I don't really know / Or even careBut after singing that they don't "even care", they then state it's the core idea of the song: Every time I look into my heart / I find that she is living thereSo: too much "thinking", not much "feeling" in the lyric. And the words that should evoke feelings are used in a cliche sort of way. Here's what I think the emotional core of the song is: Someday you will find that special one,
And my heart will be undone
How will I believe this sweet illusion
That you still love me? Edit: To make it a bit less "thinky", I changed the POV as well.  But why not ratchet up the the emotions even more? Instead of making him worry about the future where he'll have to confront the illusion that she still loves him, why not make that the motivating element? The way you two exchange knowing glances,
brush back your hair then quickly look away
I know there's no chances
you'll bring back the love you took awayIs that helpful? It's just an opinion, feel free to ignore. 
Last edited by dcuny; 01/06/23 06:18 AM. Reason: Explained why I suggested changing POV
-- David Cuny My virtual singer development blogVocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?BiaB 2025 | Windows 11 | Reaper | Way too many VSTis.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 7,170
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 7,170 |
"The way you two exchange knowing glances,
brush back your hair then quickly look away.
I know there're no chances,
you'll bring back the love you took away."
Plural agreement.
or
"The way you two exchange knowing glances,
brush back your hair then quickly look away.
I know there's no chance,
you'll bring back the love you took away."
Last edited by rayc; 01/05/23 11:24 PM.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,615
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,615 |
I enjoyed this.
Thanks for posting TM.
Rob4580
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 4,808
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 4,808 |
Meh is just too strong a word, Bob. It's better than that, although not your best. My favorite part was the violin solo and the dreamy guitar. I like Ray's first post. Total agreement here. There IS, however, some emotion in the melody, but the vocalist is singing the notes, not the words. I really like David's assessment, although I may not agree with it all.
Listened three times and each one is better. The melody is really good (although the lower notes seem too low for Sam's comfort zone of expression), the idea is good, the chord changes are good. The whole song is way above meh.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 12,727
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 12,727 |
I made the mistake of reading the comments before listening.
That "jaded" my listen.
There did seem to be a "disconnect" between the lyric message and the tone of the vocal and the melody.
The melody, btw, is really nice (but, too "positive sounding" for the message).
I wasn't "convinced" by the singer.
Nice backing track/arrangement. Mix is nice - though the vocal is slightly too-up-front (opinion).
The discussion (above) certainly is interesting...
fj
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8,021
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8,021 |
"The way you two exchange knowing glances,
brush back your hair then quickly look away.
I know there're no chances,
you'll bring back the love you took away."
Plural agreement.
or
"The way you two exchange knowing glances,
brush back your hair then quickly look away.
I know there's no chance,
you'll bring back the love you took away." Ha! I did think about that, but figured I'd put rhyming glances/chances above grammar. I was just trying to suggest how the lyric could be reframed to be less passive, and got carried away.
-- David Cuny My virtual singer development blogVocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?BiaB 2025 | Windows 11 | Reaper | Way too many VSTis.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2022
Posts: 1,031
Expert
|
|
Expert
Joined: Feb 2022
Posts: 1,031 |
TM - I agree with Marty in this is well above "meh." I think you've got a good song in the making here. I agree with most of the comments made so far. Please don't give up on this one. I think that with the incorporation of the ideas above, you're going to come up with a song that really shines. The lead vocal seems less than passionate in putting forth the song - which may be unfair, just how it came across in my ears. I also thought it could use some background vocals. I liked the backtrack you used. Keep workin' it!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2021
Posts: 47
Enthusiast
|
|
Enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2021
Posts: 47 |
I enjoyed listening to your track although I feel that it is not an easy song to sing. I think the members have made some good suggestions which could improve the song. That’s what I like about the forum - members can give great feedback and advice.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,527
Expert
|
|
Expert
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,527 |
Hi Bob
A great song
Maybe not so well sung
But I think Sam is the right singer
He should maybe work more with the song
So I couldn't sing the song at all ;-)))
But in any case this is a great song
Many greetings
Andi ;-)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 2,372
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 2,372 |
Bob.
The vocal is a little pitchy on the high notes, which must be the top of his range. However if the key was lowered he'd be really struggling with the low ones.
He doesn't seem happy with this key though so maybe he needs to change the melody in certain areas so he can work in a different key.
The music has no dynamics to help him. It's the same tone all the way through.
Having said all that I think it's worth a rewrite, as there are parts worth saving.
Vic
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jun 2020
Posts: 2,671
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Jun 2020
Posts: 2,671 |
Hey TM, overall I think this is a good listen, but I do agree with those that say there is little emotion in the vocals. In a couple places I was expecting the vocals to jump an octave to really express longing or pain.
https://soundcloud.com/user-646279677BiaB 2025 Windows For me there’s no better place in the band than to have one leg in the harmony world and the other in the percussive. Thank you Paul Tutmarc and Leo Fender.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 2,733
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 2,733 |
I don't think it's a 'meh' song, but it can definitely be improved.
Make it a bit faster and add some dynamic changes, maybe make the chorus a bit less challenging for the singer, and Sam shouldn't put every syllable exactly on the beat, because that sounds rhythmically boring.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,462
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,462 |
Many good advices given already. To me, the vocal is too upfront and the arrangement is bit lifeless. That dreamy guitar works well, but I would use stronger drum track (or mix the current more upfront) to bring some extra kick. I would also add an electric guitar playing held chords in the chorus. But that's just me, the song itself is a good one, nice melody and yearning lyrics, "But as long as both our paths, sometimes cross/That's all I need to keep my dream alive" summarizes the sweet illusion nicely.
Janne
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jun 2016
Posts: 3,357
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Jun 2016
Posts: 3,357 |
Bob,
I`d like to hear this with a vocal that`s more connected to the feelings expressed in the lyrics... and that makes more of the melody.
Many interesting comments on this already; bottom line for me is that the vocal issues are too distracting to really appreciate the song, which I think is well worth saving.
Robert
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,931
Veteran
|
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,931 |
Thanks to everyone for your input. I've decided to scrap the song and have removed it from Soundcloud.
Windows 11, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 2i2, Sony Acid Music Studio 10, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 2,372
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 2,372 |
That’s a shame.
I hate to give up on a song. Maybe save it for another time?
Vic
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Band-in-a-Box 2026 Video: The Newly Designed Piano Roll Window
In this video, we explore the updated Piano Roll, complete with a modernized look and exciting new features. You’ll see new filtering options that make it easy to focus on specific note groups, smoother and more intuitive note entry and editing, and enhanced options for zooming, looping, and more.
Watch the video.
You can see all the 2026 videos on our forum!
Band-in-a-Box 2026 Video: AI Stems & Notes - split polyphonic audio into instruments and transcribe
This video demonstrates how to use the new AI-Notes feature together with the AI-Stems splitter, allowing you to select an audio file and have it separated into individual stems while transcribing each one to its own MIDI track. AI-Notes converts polyphonic audio—either full mixes or individual instruments—into MIDI that you can view in notation or play back instantly.
Watch the video.
You can see all the 2026 videos on our forum!
Bonus PAK and 49-PAK for Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®
With your version 2026 for Windows Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, Audiophile Edition or PlusPAK purchase, we'll include a Bonus PAK full of great new Add-ons for FREE! Or upgrade to the 2026 49-PAK for only $49 to receive even more NEW Add-ons including 20 additional RealTracks!
These PAKs are loaded with additional add-ons to supercharge your Band-in-a-Box®!
This Free Bonus PAK includes:
- The 2026 RealCombos Booster PAK:
-For Pro customers, this includes 27 new RealTracks and 23 new RealStyles.
-For MegaPAK customers, this includes 25 new RealTracks and 23 new RealStyles.
-For UltraPAK customers, this includes 12 new RealStyles.
- MIDI Styles Set 92: Look Ma! More MIDI 15: Latin Jazz
- MIDI SuperTracks Set 46: Piano & Organ
- Instrumental Studies Set 24: Groovin' Blues Soloing
- Artist Performance Set 19: Songs with Vocals 9
- Playable RealTracks Set 5
- RealDrums Stems Set 9: Cool Brushes
- SynthMaster Sounds Set 1 (with audio demos)
- Android Band-in-a-Box® App (included)
Looking for more great add-ons, then upgrade to the 2026 49-PAK for just $49 and you'll get:
- 20 Bonus Unreleased RealTracks and RealDrums with 20 RealStyle.
- FLAC Files (lossless audio files) for the 20 Bonus Unreleased RealTracks and RealDrums
- MIDI Styles Set 93: Look Ma! More MIDI 16: SynthMaster
- MIDI SuperTracks Set 47: More SynthMaster
- Instrumental Studies 25 - Soul Jazz Guitar Soloing
- Artist Performance Set 20: Songs with Vocals 10
- RealDrums Stems Set 10: Groovin' Sticks
- SynthMaster Sounds & Styles Set 2 (sounds & styles with audio demos)
Learn more about the Bonus PAKs for Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®!
Video: New User Interface (GUI)
Join Tobin as he takes you on a tour of the new user interface in Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®! This modern GUI redesign offers a sleek new look with updated toolbars, refreshed windows, and a smoother workflow. The brand-new side toolbar puts track selection, the MultiPicker Library, and other essential tools right at your fingertips. Plus, our upgraded Multi-View lets you layer multiple windows without overlap, giving you a highly flexible workspace. Many windows—including Tracks, Piano Roll, and more—have been redesigned for improved usability and a cleaner, more intuitive interface, and more!
Watch the video.
You can see all the 2026 videos on our forum!
Introducing XPro Styles PAK 10 – Now Available for Windows Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 10 for Windows & Mac Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 28 RealTracks and RealDrums!
Few things are certain in life: death, taxes, and a brand spankin’ new XPro Styles PAK! In this, the 10th edition of our XPro Styles PAK series, we’ve got 100 styles coming your way! We have the classic 25 styles each from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, and rounding out this volume's wildcard slot is 25 styles in the Praise & Worship genre! A wide spanning genre, you can find everything from rock, folk, country, and more underneath its umbrella. The included 28 RealTracks and RealDrums can be used with any Band-in-a-Box® 2026 (and higher) package.
Here’s just a small sampling of what you can look forward to in XPro Styles PAK 10: Soft indie folk worship songs, bumpin’ country boogies, gospel praise breaks, hard rockin’ pop, funky disco grooves, smooth Latin jazz pop, bossa nova fusion, western swing, alternative hip-hop, cool country funk, and much more!
Special offers until December 31st, 2025!
All the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 10 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea), or get them all in the XPro Styles PAK Bundle for only $149 (reg. $299)! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Video: XPro Styles PAK 10 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2025 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
Introducing Xtra Styles PAK 21 – Now Available for Windows Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!
Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Windows & Mac Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) is here with 200 brand new RealStyles!
We're excited to bring you our latest Xtra Styles PAK installment—the all new Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher)!
Rejoice, one and all, for Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box® is here! We’re serving up 200 brand spankin’ new styles to delight your musical taste buds! The first three courses are the classics you’ve come to know and love, including offerings from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, but, not to be outdone, this year’s fourth course is bro country! A wide ranging genre, you can find everything from hip-hop, uptempo outlaw country, hard hitting rock, funk, and even electronica, all with that familiar bro country flair. The dinner bell has been rung, pickup up Xtra Styles PAK 21 today!
In this PAK you’ll discover: Energetic folk rock, raucous train beats, fast country boogies, acid jazz grooves, laid-back funky jams, a bevy of breezy jazz waltzes, calm electro funk, indie synth pop, industrial synth metal, and more bro country than could possibly fit in the back of a pickup truck!
Special offers until December 31st, 2025!
All the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 21 are on special for only $29 each (reg $49), or get all 21 PAKs for $199 (reg $399)! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 21.
Video: Xtra Styles PAK 21 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 21 requires the 2025 or higher UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
Introducing XPro Styles PAK 10 – Now Available for Mac Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 10 for Mac & Windows Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 28 RealTracks and RealDrums!
Few things are certain in life: death, taxes, and a brand spankin’ new XPro Styles PAK! In this, the 10th edition of our XPro Styles PAK series, we’ve got 100 styles coming your way! We have the classic 25 styles each from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, and rounding out this volume's wildcard slot is 25 styles in the Praise & Worship genre! A wide spanning genre, you can find everything from rock, folk, country, and more underneath its umbrella. The included 28 RealTracks and RealDrums can be used with any Band-in-a-Box® 2026 (and higher) package.
Here’s just a small sampling of what you can look forward to in XPro Styles PAK 10: Soft indie folk worship songs, bumpin’ country boogies, gospel praise breaks, hard rockin’ pop, funky disco grooves, smooth Latin jazz pop, bossa nova fusion, western swing, alternative hip-hop, cool country funk, and much more!
Special offers until December 31st, 2025!
All the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 10 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea), or get them all in the XPro Styles PAK Bundle for only $149 (reg. $299)! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Video: XPro Styles PAK 10 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2025 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Forums57
Topics85,366
Posts791,312
Members39,862
| |
Most Online25,754
Jan 24th, 2025
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Dansk
Deutsch - Windows
Español
Français - Windows
Italiano - Windows
Nederlands
Polski
Português
Svenskt
русский
Japanese
Simplified Chinese
Traditional Chinese
Korean