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I started this song in December, a week ago David Smith provided an excellent solo. Two days ago I wrote the,lyric and yesterday drafted a melody. It has a bit of a "sound" that can be vaguely tagged to the inspiration: Marquee Moon. This morning I read that the singer & co-guitarist of that band died. The song seems a little tawdry or churlish if considered a post death ka-ching. It may be described as that but it, definitely, wasn't planned as a dark, death tribute. Band In A Box provided the drums & piano. David did the solo & I scratched about to managed the rest. It is, at present, a work in progress. 1st Mix Here's a remix based on suggestions.. REMIX #1 Read your way in Speak your way out You can't make the changes If you're crippled with doubt. Hide in your own skin Mute your scream & shout You can't talk to strangers On the roundabout C1 Minutes Hours Days Lifetimes Like rats in a maze Minute computations Our procrastination Dazed and still confused Life crimes & the serial abused V2 Talk your way in Crawl your way out It all rearranges If you're with or without. Peel off your old skin Mute your scream & shout You can't walk with strangers On the roundabout C2 Minutes Hours Days Lifetimes Like rats in a maze Minute implications Our predestination Dazed and falsely accused Lifetime serially misused V3 Lie your way in Buy your way out It all rearranges If you're caught without. Try on your new skin Eat your scream & shout No silver spoon or manger When the reigns a drought. C2 Minutes Hours Days Lifetimes Rat's likely amazed Minute alterations Our brief fascinations Dazed and still confused Lifetime's crime excused
Last edited by rayc; 01/30/23 05:24 PM.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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I thought 'NOT QUITE READY but circumstances dictate' was a pretty interesting song title until I read that it wasn't  I think it sounds already pretty good and mature for a WIP. I like the verses a lot, the choruses are a bit bumpy and could have a better flow. Interesting (in a good way) drum pattern, the ride cymbals could have a little break here or there.
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Howdy Ray, I think you've got a good one going here. I'm unfamiliar with the band you've mentioned, so I don't know how the words fit in that respect, but I think it's a good write overall. It may be just a personal thing, but I like the simplicity of this mix as compared to some of your others. There were a couple of places where the vocal could use a little polish, but I liked the way you sang it. I thought the bass work was good too. I also thought that ending music could have been a little more abrupt, but again that's just a personal style thing. I'm looking forward to hearing the finished product - this is good.
Brad
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Ray,
The guitar panning really kicks this off in an interesting way! While I'm not familiar with the singer/group you referenced this certainly sounds good to me! Your vocal is mixed really well to my ears! It's setting hotter in the mix than what I remember from earlier tunes of yours and I think it sounds just right! The guitar solo sounds like a great choice for this one! It really fits the whole vibe of the song!
Thanks, T
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Ray,
It's a good song. Nice guitar work by Mr Smith.
Perhaps the guitar runs from the verse to the chorus could be louder - they sound good to me.
Much louder than usual vocal from you and it sounds fine.
Nice bass & rhythm.
It's coming along really well.
Peter
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Ray,
A lot of good stuff happening in this
The instruments all sound really good
Bass and drums are especially good (though not a fan of the open hat during the chorus)
Cool solo
Vocals are in a good place
The hard panned guitars tugged on my ears during the verse then sounded "right" during the chorus and solos
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I thought 'NOT QUITE READY but circumstances dictate' was a pretty interesting song title until I read that it wasn't I think it sounds already pretty good and mature for a WIP. I like the verses a lot, the choruses are a bit bumpy and could have a better flow. Interesting (in a good way) drum pattern, the ride cymbals could have a little break here or there. Thanks B.D. I did consider it for the song title...actually I haven't settled on a title yet. Originally it was CRT then M/H/D what it ends up I don't know as yet. I'll listen for the ride - it's only really busting loose in the last chorus but I'll listen.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Howdy Ray, I think you've got a good one going here. I'm unfamiliar with the band you've mentioned, so I don't know how the words fit in that respect, but I think it's a good write overall. It may be just a personal thing, but I like the simplicity of this mix as compared to some of your others. There were a couple of places where the vocal could use a little polish, but I liked the way you sang it. I thought the bass work was good too. I also thought that ending music could have been a little more abrupt, but again that's just a personal style thing. I'm looking forward to hearing the finished product - this is good.
Brad Thanks Brad, despite their influence not a lot of folk know the band, certainly not a chart act except in the UK. The lyrics aren't related to the band in any way - just words to fit the spaces. The vocal could use A LOT of polish but thanks for your kind words.
Last edited by rayc; 01/29/23 03:12 PM.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Ray,
The guitar panning really kicks this off in an interesting way! While I'm not familiar with the singer/group you referenced this certainly sounds good to me! Your vocal is mixed really well to my ears! It's setting hotter in the mix than what I remember from earlier tunes of yours and I think it sounds just right! The guitar solo sounds like a great choice for this one! It really fits the whole vibe of the song!
Thanks, T It's an old band - kicked off around 72 but didn't release an album until 78. Thanks for your generous words.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Ray, I really love this. It totally reminds me of Television, who I love. Brings back very pleasant memories of my NYC youth. I am smiling right now. 
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Ray,
It's a good song. Nice guitar work by Mr Smith.
Perhaps the guitar runs from the verse to the chorus could be louder - they sound good to me.
Much louder than usual vocal from you and it sounds fine.
Nice bass & rhythm.
It's coming along really well.
Peter
Thank you Peter, I was nervous about that guitar interlude, the key is right but it is me playing so I couldn't be sure if it worked simply becasue I liked it. I'll bump it a bit. The vocal is vastly improved by the JSFX Spectrum Matcher...I used David Bowie's verse vocal from Space Oddity as the reference track and the VST filled in the gaps to make me sound a bit warmer. Yes, David did a cool thing.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Ray,
A lot of good stuff happening in this
The instruments all sound really good
Bass and drums are especially good (though not a fan of the open hat during the chorus)
Cool solo
Vocals are in a good place
The hard panned guitars tugged on my ears during the verse then sounded "right" during the chorus and solos
Thanks Floyd, The options were to continue the same as the verse, the open high hat or the full on ride assault of the final chorus. I opted for change/variety but will look/listen again. Hard panned guitars - that's my laziness. It makes sense in the chorus with two very similar parts hard panned for a big sound but not in the verse. I'll pull the verse guitars in a bit - thanks for the good ears, (as usual).
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Ray, I really love this. It totally reminds me of Television, who I love. Brings back very pleasant memories of my NYC youth. I am smiling right now. Ah, life and experience, enhanced by music. Well, your experiences in the Big Crapple both musical, cultural and social would predispose your mind to Television style openness. THANKS!
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Hi Ray, you never disappoint I like the swapping guitar left to right. Great job enjoyed very much thanks for sharing, Eric!
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I listened to the remix.
Love the pan on the guitars, very different, but effective.
Good vocal, I can hear you getting more confident with that. Great bass! And I really like the solo from David.
Cool song, Ray, enjoyed the listen.
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Ray, I hadn't heard of that band or band member so I can't compare this song to their song but I really liked this one.
Super groove, those choppy chords in the verses were brilliant.
Super vocal and mix.
Outstanding guitar and bass chops.
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I listened to the second mix. Sounds good, but the vocal was a bit buried in the second half.
Speaking of which, the best vocal I've heard from you yet!
Good work!
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Ray,
I listened to the first mix a couple of days or so ago . . . listening to the remix now. It’s got a catchy vibe and I love the guitar runs in this (as well as the lead solo). I’m not sure at this point I have any suggestions . . . I’m wavering on whether the vocal should come up a bit . . . thinking so. It’s a really good vocal, would like to hear it a bit more I think. See what others think.
Sounding great so far!
Deej
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I listened to the remix.
Love the pan on the guitars, very different, but effective.
Good vocal, I can hear you getting more confident with that. Great bass! And I really like the solo from David.
Cool song, Ray, enjoyed the listen. Thanks sir, The vocal is the result of JSFX Spectrum Matcher giving some roundness to my voice.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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