PG Music Home Forums General Discussion User Showcase While Al David's Away from the Forum

Al posted a blues instrumental in February. A lovely piece that caught my ear.
We started collaborating on turning it into a vocal track as well.
Al's been unavailable of late - circumstances & life get in the way.
I've continued to work on it and asked a friend, Alison Reynolds - singer, songwriter, cellist - to contribute a melody & vocals.
Alison did just that and it's fab.
The backing is Al's creation:
Key=Fm , Tempo 70,
Style MIDI Instruments are : Finger Electric Bass (34), Bright Piano (2)
RealTracks in song: 3438:Guitar, Electric, Soloist
BritPsycPopBallad Ev 065
RealDrums in Song: BluesRockSlowEv^5-Snr,Ride
RealDrums in Song:BluesRockSlowEv^5-a:Snare , b:Snare, Ride



I'm looking for comments/suggestions/ideas to improve it so that I can present Al with a tidy package of his excellent work.

Here's a faux mastered version for your ears.

WARNING - it's a bit dark.
All Night Tears
Here's a remix taking account of most suggestions made yesterday.
I tried all of them but not all "worked".
I discussed and trialled the "pitch" bits with Alison. She's adamant she intended and likes the slides/drops in V1 so we agreed to leave them be. I'm still working on the metallic sound Misha hears...there's a graininess to the el. piano that seems to be the problem.
All Night Tears 2
I've had another crack at suggestions.
Some are easily done - others less so. The lead licks between vocal phrases are edited from the main solo track which was, in the original, the star & song long. Editing them to fit meant working with, essentially, what was there in line with the progression. I've reduced them to very few in the verses and as long or short as the phrase allows. The reverb & delay are on the guitar from the outset...baked on.
I added the chop guitar - sadly BIAB didn't have a real track that worked at the tempo so I had to edit one - every beat of it - to fit.
I looked into the ride cymbal - it's there in the Real Drum track BUT is so quiet that it took three iterations of EQ boost to bring it forward enough & then there were, as expected lots of bits of snare & other cymbals that made things ugly. In the end I tracked down the ride in the BIAB RD folder required, found the samples track, snipped the ride and edited it into the song...one hit at a time that made the chop seem like a breeze.
El Piano removed from the intro.
I'm not sure how I feel about the result as yet. I'll need to listen for a bit. As mentioned, I'm trying to stay as close to Al's original as possible within the circumstances.
Oh, and to satisfy Mark's curiosity & cobbled together a different solo from the phrases available in the other two sections that are the same (verses).
All Night Tears V3
A little more tweaking and, since I was about it I temporarily replaced the bass with my own part. Not as busy, not as fretless and toppy, (though BIAB described it as finger played), just becasue I felt like it. Normally I'd have played the chop guitar but after the time editing I'll leave that alone. I'll probably ditch my bass tomorrow.
ANTears Bass Replace

Lyrics
You look as though you've faced a 1000 fears,
Your eyes are red,
Your nose is too.
Tell me what they did to you.
For you to flood with all night tears.

Chorus
It's black and white what's gone on tonight
It's black n blue what's been done to you
It's back to back
& blow by blow
Home is the last place you should go.

V2
It's plain to see what happened to you
The narcissist beat a fresh tattoo
Don't light a match
The gas is strong
It doesn't matter baby
It's not you who's wrong
Just weeks ago was wedding party cheers
A honeymoon a brand new life
Bad jokes about trouble & strife
Now love's drowning in all night tears.

Chorus
It's black and white what's gone on tonight
It's black n blue what's been done to you
It's back to back
& blow by blow
It's not a life that you should know.

Chorus
It's black and white what's gone on tonight
It's black n blue what's been done to you
It's back to back
& blow by blow
Home is the last place you should go.
Home is the last place you should go.