|
Log in to post
|
Print Thread |
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 2,060
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 2,060 |
Hi, all: Here’s almost something new . . . and by almost, I mean that I’m not quite sure if I’m done with it . . . and by that, I mean there are other things that I’m thinking of doing with it but not sure if I should . . . which is also to say, that I’m not sure it’s even a song worth spending more time on--my answer to which changes from moment to moment. So, I figure, why not put out what I have so far for some input to help me decide? It’s about the only thing new I’ve got going, for better or worse. Thanks in advance for the listens and feedback. My best to you all, Deej Here’s the song:NEVERMORE Here are the lyrics:Hey, girl, there’s a raven at your door Speaking truths that you’ve well heard before A cheater’s proof in hand Your man doesn’t love you anymore And it’s high time you know it And the answer to the question you Have asked a million times Is the same one you’ve tried so hard to ignore There’s a message in this raven’s wings Now scream it to the skies Nevermore Hey, girl, it’s a shout out from the dark A true confession of a tell tale heart You’ve been left guessing, but now you know So blow it all apart You’ve got the strength Don’t be shy to show it Walk away, but it’s okay if you need to cry I’ll be here, ever near You can take this feathered hand And we can fly (Never more waiting in the dark Evermore in this raven’s heart) And here’s the band:RealTracks 1826: Bass, Electric, PopModernGrooveSync4s RealTracks 3182: Guitar, Acoustic, Rhythm GrungeUnpluggedQuinn RealTracks 1830: Guitar, Electric, Rhythm PopModernGrooveBrightDist RealTracks 3520: Guitar, Electric, Rhythm Americana16thsDelayBrent RealTracks 1262: Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm PopShiningHeld RealDrums: RockNorthern^7
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 8,647
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 8,647 |
HI Deej ...
I always look forward to a new one from you.
I enjoyed this from start to finish. I like the idea of using a raven as the messenger - unique and interesting in a most favorable way.
Nice chord pattern, too - especially in the chorus. There's just something about the I - 1V7 chord combination that piques my ears' interest. Good lyric, vocal, and arrangement. I enjoyed my listen very much. Spot-on mix, too.
This couplet is, in my opinion, the best in the lyric:
Hey, girl, it’s a shout out from the dark
A true confession of a tell tale heart
Take care ...
Alan
BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*32GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,617
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,617 |
I'm on my cell phone, so I may be more succinct than usual. Where's the problem?  Listened to it only once, but enjoyed every second of it. The form is excellent, you vary things in between repetitions of the chorus and the verses in between, and that more than keeps the listener's interest. The writing is very, very good. If I am to be INCREDIBLY picky, make sure you land that falsetto note on the word "okay" It's so high! But, look, this is an excellent, really excellent song. I would put it amongst your top ones. I wouldn't change a thing, me, but (as you yourself told me many times) don't second guess your own artistic instinct. I, myself, really loved it ... and its message is original, if only because of the way it's presented in. Maybe I am easy to please, but I can't see a problem, here.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 8,967
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 8,967 |
Deej,
This is superb! Your vocal is stellar and the production is excellent. Love the song and the arrangement. Great track selection.
This was definitely worth putting out.
Bob
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 851
Expert
|
|
Expert
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 851 |
Interesting and thoughtful lyric
Cool Melody that took you to the catchy chorus.
Good mix and production and your voice sounds perfect for this tune
Nice jobNice job
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 12,919
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 12,919 |
Deej,
A solid track. That BAND holds together well.
Vocals are excellent - as always. Well recorded. (Stellar falsetto in the bridge!)
A "clever" write. A bit esoteric for my tastes, though. Still...well done.
A VERY catchy chorus.
You are a talent.
fj
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 3,033
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 3,033 |
I can't find anything I would change, so my advice is: leave it as it is Love the lyrics and its delivery, the production and especially the chorus. Very catchy!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,527
Expert
|
|
Expert
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,527 |
Hi DJ
WOW - Really good song from the beginning to the end
Excellent vocal work
You can't get the chorus out of your head ;-)))
1A work DJ
Many greetings
Andi ;-)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 7,263
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 7,263 |
Deej,
it's excellent as it is. The lighter arrangement contrasting with the dark associations with the lyric.
ACE melody and progressions.
Superb vocal performance.
I don't know - you could try it in the BIAB Doom style for fun.
I'm sure it work a treat...can't hurt but, as it stands, this is a cool thing already.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,825
Expert
|
|
Expert
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,825 |
Hi Deej,
Very good song, good lyrics and well mixed.
No room for an instrumental solo?
Best Regards
Nigel
Nigel Spiers
Christchurch, New Zealand
info@nzacoustics.com
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 6,062
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 6,062 |
Hi Deej,
Love this! You got your inspiration from Edgar Allan Poe I guess? Great idea, works really well.
Man, that vocal! Especially love the bridge.
Enjoyed!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 5,059
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 5,059 |
Keep at it, Deej, and soon everyone will be raven about it (couldn't help it). You know I like your voice so much that I'd listen to you sing the phone book. I really like the melody, and the band and mix are perfect. I've got nothing for ya to consider except I like Ray's suggestion to try other Styles. Not because the song needs it, but because it's fun AND it could inspire you to make a few changes --again, not that change is necessary. Next month I'll post the 3rd version of a song that will feature Ray on bass.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,592
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,592 |
Nice lyrics, I like the use of raven as the caller for liberation.
Really enjoyed the chord progression, especially the minor of verses and then the more major choruses. Catchy chorus.
Very strong vocal performance, very good work with the high notes and the backing vocals are tasty.
I don't have ideas for improvement, although reminds me of Aerosmith ballads, maybe stronger electric guitars in the chorus (+solo) might give some extra spice.
Janne
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,361
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,361 |
Deej...I can't really add much to what has already been said but I would like to reiterate some of it...my first impression is what a clever write and hook...E.A.P. would be flattered...secondly I agree with Marty and Ray's thought of trying other styles for fun and you did say you weren't quite sure if it's done yet or not...I know there have been times I've done that and found something I liked better...in fact after I get my chord structure into BiaB as a regular practice I play them through as many styles as I can in search of the "one" that enhances the lyrics the best.
BUT, you don't have to change a thing to make this a great song with a cool hook and a killer vocal (as usual)!
www.soundclick.com/firesongBiaB 2024, Steinberg Cubase Pro 13, Wavelab 11.2, SpetraLayers Pro 10, Audacity, Steinberg UR44 Interface, Yamaha Genos, Roland FP60 and FP10, Windows 10 You are who you are because you do what you do because of what you believe.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,686
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,686 |
DJ, if I were you I would be "raven" about this one!
This is one outstanding song.
Fantastic vocal, backing tracks, mix, and lyrics.
I wouldn't change a thing.
Loved it.
Tips on how to fall asleep in a living room chair:
1- Be old
2- Sit in a chair
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 2,060
Veteran
|
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 2,060 |
Alan, James, Bob, Elliott, Floyd, B.D., Andi, rayc, Nigel, Dave, Marty, Janne, Dan, and Mario:
Thank you all for the listens and really helpful feedback. As you may have picked up, I wasn’t too sure about this and had mixed feelings about it . . . so your positive comments are encouraging. I’ve tweaked the mix a bit based on your comments.
One of the things I was concerned about was the abrupt start—that is, no intro. No one seemed to mind it, but I decided to add a short sound effect driven intro. I also added some beefier electric guitars into the chorus . . . and lastly, a cello. All of those those tracks are from the Doomsday style that rayc recommended. I think it all works, but I’m sure you’ll let me know if otherwise.
Some thoughts on the specific comments:
Floyd: Yeah, “esoteric” is a fair word for to describe the lyric . . . and I think that’s in part what has worried me . . . it’s not easily accessible , particularly with the Poe references. But hopefully the sound and melody compensate, and it resonates more on a further listen? Dunno.
Ray, Marty and Dan: So I did play with a number of additional styles following your comment. The Doomsday style with the cello was really cool . . . unfortunately for the verses, the chugging guitars didn’t really play the diminished chord so it wouldn’t work all the way through. But as noted above, I added the Thrash electric guitars into the chorus, and used the cello as well (with some restraint occasionally conflicted with the melody). Hopefully a good addition.
Nigel: Perhaps a function of my not being fully confident in the tune, I wanted to keep this short and sweet . . . under 3.5 minutes. Another reason I skipped the intro. But beyond that, I couldn’t find a natural place for one. The best option would have been before the bridge, but I thought that would take away from some of the song’s momentum. So, opted to do without. A good thought though.
Dave: I’m not sure I can honestly say it was inspired by Poe . . . that is, I didn't start writing the song with Poe in mind. I fell upon that opening line during my usual writing process . . . which is me strumming away on guitar while I mumble random nonsense until a line or phrase jumps out at me. But once I had the first line, I knew I wanted to incorporate more Poe elements . . . leading ultimately to the title of the song and the “tell tale heart” reference.
Janne: See above . . . stronger electrics in the chorus added . . . great suggestion!
Thanks again all . . . hope the changes are for the better.
Deej
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jan 2023
Posts: 2
Newbie
|
|
Newbie
Joined: Jan 2023
Posts: 2 |
The chord pattern is quite impressive, particularly in the chorus. Experience the captivating allure of the I - IV7 chord progression that is sure to capture your auditory senses. Experience the perfect combination of captivating lyrics, mesmerizing vocals, and flawless arrangement. Experience the joy of listening with our exceptional audio quality. Perfectly blended, as well.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 3,664
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 3,664 |
It all sounds good to me. No, that's wrong. It sounds great to me. Clever lyrics and use of Poe. Catchy chorus. Vocal is tops, as usual.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Mar 2018
Posts: 7,248
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Mar 2018
Posts: 7,248 |
Deej,
You are one of my favorite vocalists here. Never a disappointing experience. Actually, I liked this tune a lot. Probably would make first 3 top songs by you on my list. Excellent lyrics, vocal performance and arrangement. The "abrupt start" you mentioned did not bother me personally at all. However if you want an opinion, there might be an easy cheat/addition to make intro a bit more smooth. After the last "knock" consider a sliding note of a bass or other instrument that would lead into the tune. In any case amazing effort and thank you for sharing.
Misha.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 8,491
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 8,491 |
Hey DJ,
Great song man. All of your stuff has a real classic old school radio vibe.
Love it..
Excellent production and vocals.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Band-in-a-Box 2026 for Mac Videos
With the release of Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Mac, we’re rolling out a collection of brand-new videos on our YouTube channel. We’ll keep this forum post updated so you can easily find all the latest videos in one convenient spot.
Whether you're exploring new features, checking out the latest RealTracks or Style PAKs, this is your go-to guide for Band-in-a-Box® 2026.
Check out this forum post for "One Stop Shopping" of our Band-in-a-Box® 2026 Mac Videos!
Band-in-a-Box 2026 for Mac is Here!
Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Mac is here and it is packed with major new features! There’s a new modern look, a GUI redesign to all areas of the program including toolbars, windows, workflow and more. There’s a Multi-view layout for organizing multiple windows. A standout addition is the powerful AI-Notes feature, which uses AI neural-net technology to transcribe polyphonic audio into MIDI—entire mixes or individual instruments—making it easy to study, view, and play parts from any song. And that’s just the beginning—there are over 100 new features in this exciting release.
Along with version 2026, we've released an incredible lineup of new content! There's 202 new RealTracks, brand-new RealStyles, MIDI SuperTracks, Instrumental Studies, “Songs with Vocals” Artist Performance Sets, Playable RealTracks Set 5, two new RealDrums Stems sets, XPro Styles PAK 10, Xtra Styles PAK 21, and much more!
Special Offers
Upgrade to Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Mac and save up to 50% on most upgrade packages during our special offer—available until May 15, 2026. Visit our Band-in-a-Box® packages page to explore all available upgrade options.
2026 Free Bonus PAK & 49-PAK Add-ons
Our Free Bonus PAK and 49-PAK are loaded with amazing add-ons! The Free Bonus PAK is included with most Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Mac packages, but you can unlock even more—including 20 unreleased RealTracks—by upgrading to the 2026 49-PAK for just $49.
Holiday Weekend Hours
As we hop into the Easter weekend, here are our holiday hours:
April 3 (Good Friday): 8:00 AM – 4:00 PM PDT
April 4 (Saturday): Closed
April 5 (Easter Sunday): Closed
April 6 (Easter Monday): Open regular hours
Wishing you an egg-cellent weekend!
— Team PG
Update to Build 10 of RealBand® 2026 for Windows®!
If you're already using RealBand 2026 for Windows, download build 10 to get all the latest additions and enhancements.
Band-in-a-Box® 2025 for Mac® users: Build 904 now available!
If you're already using Band-in-a-Box® 2025 for Mac®, make sure to grab the latest update! Build 904 is now available for download and includes the newest additions and enhancements from our team.
Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows® users: Build 1237 is now available!
Already a Band-in-a-Box 2026 for Windows user? Stay up to date and download the build 1237 to get all the latest additions and enhancements.
PowerTracks Pro 2026 for Windows is Here!
PowerTracks 2026 is here—bringing powerful new enhancements designed to make your production workflow faster, smoother, and more intuitive than ever.
The enhanced Mixer now shows Track Type and Instrument icons for instant track recognition, while a new grid option simplifies editing views. Non-floating windows adopt a modern title bar style, replacing the legacy blue bar.
The Master Volume is now applied at the end of the audio chain for consistent levels and full-signal master effects.
Tablature now includes a “Save bends when saving XML” option for improved compatibility with PG Music tools. Plus, you can instantly match all track heights with a simple Ctrl-release after resizing, and Add2 chords from MGU/SGU files are now fully supported... and more!
Get started today—first-time packages start at just $49.
Already using PowerTracks Pro Audio? Upgrade for as little as $29 and enjoy the latest improvements!
Order now!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Forums57
Topics86,174
Posts801,622
Members40,061
| |
Most Online64,515
Apr 8th, 2026
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Dansk
Deutsch - Windows
Español
Français - Windows
Italiano - Windows
Nederlands
Polski
Português
Svenskt
русский
Japanese
Simplified Chinese
Traditional Chinese
Korean