Thank you all for listening to 'Home Makers' and a special thank you to those who offered kind words and constructive criticism! It's the only way I'll get better as a songwriter is to hear from others who have the addiction, passion, and experience.

Originally Posted by floyd jane
Dewey,
Using the word "endangered" in the first line felt "harsh". I think a "gentler" opening would suit the song.
(opinion)
fj

Floyd, I'll definitely consider an alternate word or phrase; my intent was to highlight the decline of the nuclear family over the past several decades and then give honor to 'the few protecting it today'. Thanks for listening and thoughtfully commenting, my friend!

Originally Posted by dcuny
Hi, Dewey.

   And there are still a few protecting it today

While there is a higher percent of households with divorced parents, there are more than "a few" homemakers. As in, millions of them.

I'm sure you are correct, David; however, stating several million are still doing a great job decreases the effect of the line IMO

Originally Posted by dcuny
   From foreign wars to climate change pollution

Thank goodness, for most of us "foreign wars" are indeed "foreign", but to my ear, "foreign" sounds out of place. Maybe that's just me.

I'm not sure "climate change pollution" is a thing. There is "climate changing pollution", and "climate pollution", but I'm unaware of climate change pollution.


I suppose 'foreign' is a preference as you essentially stated (i.e., 'to my ear') and I will for sure consider an alternative word.

Climate change pollution, in my mind, includes everything from cow farts to auto emissions that the media has and still does, propagate. Not all pollution is supposed to affect climate change, though (e.g., Light pollution, water pollution). The point is that climate change (formally known as global warming) - and the pollution that causes it - is a common reason for environmental protests.


Originally Posted by dcuny
Hi, Dewey.

   Protesting seems to be the best solution
To be pedantic, protesting isn't a solution as much as it is a way to bring awareness of a problem needing solving.

Very true, David! I'll consider an alternative way to be more accurate in meaning. Good catch!

Originally Posted by dcuny
But in terms of the lyric, if you're looking to contrast "the world" against God:
   The world keeps looking for a solution

Actually, I wasn't consciously attempting to contrast the world against God; since 'world' is, in my mind, a key word I do not want to repeat it as it is set in stone in a the line a can't see changing at all - "It's time the world stood up to give them thanks"


Originally Posted by firesong
If I could offer an opinion: at the key change (2:49) I would like to hear the first phrase (HOME MAKERS Faith-filled soul savers) broken down with no percussion...then you could fade it back in or start it again at the beginning of a phrase...to me that would draw the ear to the lyric and add an added dynamic to the modulation...but that's just me

Dan, with your amazing production skills your opinion is a 'must do'! Thanks for listening and I'll mess around with it in my next iteration of this one!! Thank you, my friend

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