PG Music Home Forums General Discussion Off-Topic For Those Post On The Showcase Forum - Will Be Gone For A While Longer - Di Is Now On Hospice Care

Di went on Hospice care last week. Our house is in the process of being equipped for that support: hospital bed, bedside commode, IV poles, and other stuff. My attention is dedicated to that support. I might drop in for a listen once in a while, but not sure if I'll be posting anything new for a while.

But I do have two songs almost ready. I might finish them and post them soon, but that's about it for now. I'll reply to comments as I can.

For those interested, I'll update this post as things change.

Alan

Our thoughts are with you both.
Take care of the important stuff.
The little stuff will keep.
Give Di a wink, a smile and a gentle squeeze of the hand for me...

Alan, sooo sorry to hear this.
Know that she (and you) are in our thoughts and prayers.
--Steve

Sorry to hear Di's health is declining. My thoughts are with you both.

Charlie

Alan,

You and Di are in my thoughts… All my best to you both.

Bob

I hate hearing about these issues of life. So sorry you are dealing with this. Best to you and your loved one!

Alan, I'm sorry Di's health has declined so much. My thoughts and prayers are with you both.

Alan,
You are in my thoughts. Send kind regards to Di.
M.

Alan, thank you for the update on behalf of all of us who are invested in you and Di. Hope the two of you find peace in the time ahead. You are both in our thoughts and prayers.

Alan, that is so sad.
You and Di are in my prayers.

My heart goes out to you and Di...

You can definitely believe that the PG Music Forum family have you both in our thoughts.

Hello Alan,
I'd noted your absence and felt reasonably safe in my assumption as to why.
You've your priorities screwed on right and you've much to do & have done around you making the best setting for Di's circumstances.
I look forward to your possible posts but am just as happy wait for them as I know they'll be good value.
Look after yourself please. You're all Di has.

Dear Alan and Di,
I'm so sorry to read about this latest development. I wish you both the kindest journey possible as you settle into these new circumstances. Life is so unfair at times, and I know from comments made over the years that you both have had to wear an awful lot of that terrible unfairness. What I sincerely admire is the grace with which you work through these immense challenges that come your way. Honestly, you are truly one of the most inspiring couples I have got to know.
Sending you both a truckload of healing thoughts.
--Noel

Thoughts and prayers for comfort and peace for the family and for you as you walk this path.

Come back when you are ready.

i echo every single post here and am saying lots of prayers for you and your family.

om

Thinking and praying for you Alan and Di over here in Ireland.

Hi, Alan.

Sorry to hear it! Thoughts and prayers for you two.

A prayer for a large measure of the peace that passes all understanding for you both.

To Everyone Who Has Commented So Nicely,

Di and I thank you so much. It's a difficult time, but we find a way to manage. Even with all her issues, she still manages to sing. I think that's what keeps her going. Music in general, BIAB, and the great folks here play a large part in her happiness. You have no idea how much ya'll mean to us. Again, a heartfelt thanks to all of you.

She's holding steady at this point.

Best to all of you,

Alan & Di

We know your love will help you through such difficult times.
While you are caring for her remember to take care of yourself.

❤️❤️❤️

J&B

Update On Di:

She is actually doing a little better. New eyes and ears attending to her have made a small amount of progress. We'll take any tiny bit we can get. Taking her off of one med, changing the dosage on two of them, and changing the timeline in which she receives her meds seems to be helping. She is more alert, and she is thinking more clearly. Her internal medicine specialist says if she continues to improve over the next month, they might be able to elevate her treatment status to palliative care - the step before actual hospice. She is responding well to the treatment she is receiving.

We are very thankful for that improvement.

Again, thanks to all you for your kind words & support.

Alan & Di

saying lots of prayers for you both..always.

om

Ditto!

I have a friend who has been in palliative care for almost 2 years now.

Yes med can mess you up. I'm glad she is doing better.

Hi Folks,

Thanks a bunch for all the nice comments. Di said to tell you hello and that she appreciates your sentiments. As do I.

Alan

I'll take good news any day. Way to go Di.

Alan & Di

I am hoping that knowing you are not alone may help you both find some peace with this Long Goodbye. You are in our prayers.

https://www.pgmusic.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=814719#Post814719

Dan and Carol

Hi Again, Folks,

Well, I've been absent for almost a month - not so much because of Di's health recently - my computer was hacked and I lost almost everything - logins, passwords I hadn't written down, etc. Fortunately, I had almost all my songs saved on an external hard drive. I'm slowly getting things in order again.

Di is holding steady. Anytime there's no regression for a couple of months, we are very happy. Her memory is slowly fading, but her physical status is stable. She clearly remembers people for the most part and things that happened at least a couple of years back. But her short-term memory is basically gone. In more general terms, she doesn't know what day, month or year it is. Similarly, she's unaware of who the president is, etc.

We deal with it. She's very much aware that her memory is flawed, so that's actually a good thing.

Anyway, I thought I'd bring everyone up to date on her status and to thank all of you, again, for the very kind words of support. We truly appreciate them.

Wishing everyone well - and keep making music.

Alan & Di

Hi Dan,

Your kindness is appreciated. And I'm very sorry to hear of your wife's medical journey. Will put her in our prayers. Your song was beautifully written and deleivered. There's a lot of truth in the lyric. Thank you very much for sharing that with us.

Many years ago, I wrote a song about my former mother-in-law, who had advanced dementia. It was called "A Thousand Miles Away". The signature line is "Though you're just across the room, you're a thousand miles away. Once I've finished getting all my computer hacked issues resolved, I've find some BIAB tracks and put it together and then post it.

Buit your song is very emotional and touched us both.

Wishing you & Carol all good things that are possible at this time. Prayers and blessings,

Alan & Di

Keep in touch, Alan.
Everyone here is hoping in some small way to contribute to you and Di's support.

Just a quick update: Di is holding steady for the most part. But she is now on oxygen most of the time and her pain level is increasing.

As always, we appreciate the kind words from everyone who has commented.

Alan & Di

Alan, my heart goes out to you guys and am still praying.

Alan, you are still in my prayers. Just be sure to take care of yourself while you take care of Di.

Alan, know the many forum friends you and Di have made over the years join those who reply to your post with thoughts and prayers. As Mario said, take care of yourself. Di needs you. Bless you both...

Steve, Mario, and Ron,

Di and I thank you so much for the encouragement, well wishes, and kindness. We consider the BIAB family as part of our extended family. You have no idea how much your words and kindness mean to us.

And we will keep all of you in our prayers.

Alan & Di

Alan, I'm praying for your peace and serenity.

Alan & Di

i cant express in words the many many emotions i'm feeling reading this and i'm sure many people in this thread are much better in expressing their feelings.
all i can say is from my wife and i...we echo every single sentiment in this thread.
and will say prayers continually for you every single day.

om

Notes & old muse,

Thanks very much. She's having a rough go at the moment, but we remain optimistic for improvement.

Hope to be back posting and listening within a day or two.

Alan

PS: Di says "Hi" to everyone, and she appreciates you taking the time to send your greetings.

You are in my thoughts, Alan. You've always been incredibly kind to me and to everyone on this forum, so I do hope there is such a thing as karma, so that you get rewarded for every single kindness you've shown me and others. Praying for your wife, praying for you. As many have already said, I hope you remember to take care of yourself, too, so you can care for your wife. Anything I can do, just ask. God bless you both.

Praying for you both Al & Di.

Josie

Stay strong the pair of you. You have a family of supporters here, but you already know that.

Thanks a bunch, Audio Track. And yes, this community is fantastic!

Di fell out of bed earlier this week and hit her head on the side table and suffered a concussion and a cut on her earlobe. She's somewhat confused and her speech is a bit slurred. She has another appointment with her doctor this coming Tuesday. I keep a close watch on her. She needs lots of rest and limited mobile activity.

We appreciate your thoughts.

Alan & Di

So sorry to hear that, Alan.
Prayers for you both.

An Update ...

Di is in the hospital. She had a heart attack Friday evening. She's stable and coherent. She also has septecimia (blood infection). They're monitoring her to ensure it doesn't progress to sepsis. She's at the Decatur-Morgan Hospital in Decatur, AL. I feel they are taking good care of her.

I'm doing pretty good - just tired and concerned.

Alan

Thanks for the update, Al.
Keeping yourself occupied with music creativity is hopefully helpful, as no doubt there is a lot of stress in you life right now.

Alan, Di is in excellent hands. Take care of yourself as you and they take care of Di. Thanks for the update. If you have better things to do than update us, we all understand. Know you have love and support coming from this forum. Take care, my friend. Ron

Alan,

All the best to Di. Stay strong. Get some rest. Know that you and Di are in my thoughts.

Bob

Alan, you both are in my prayers.

You be sure to take care of yourself.

Alan & Di

I am well aware of the tough road you have travelled together the last few years. I am in your corner.

Essential Listening

Sending prayers out to both of you.

Not great news Alan,
I'm glad she's being cared for. Of course you know of the risks at present so I'll just offer fingers, thumbs, arms, legs, toes and eyes crossed for a great outcome for both of you. While Di's in care remember that you also need to breath, rest & recharge.

Many sincere thanks to all who have commented so nicely over the course of this thread. It's been uplifting and a source of strength.

The good news is that Di came home from the hospital late this evening. She's exhausted but doing a great job of hanging in there. She asked me to express her personal appreciation for your concern and support. She's resting comfortably in her own bed as I type.

Wishing all of you nothing but the very best. And thanks again.

Alan & Di

That is good news. I hope she continues her healing and recovers quickly and completely.

That is very good news. I will pray for a full recovery.

Bob & Mario,

Many thanks! All kindness and support is welcome. We appreciate all of you.

Alan & Di

A Quick Update ...

I've been away from the site for several weeks, but I'll be writing & posting again in the near future - might wait until BIAB 2025 arrives before starting any new projects. So, maybe a couple from years past in the meantime. I just needed a break to reorganize and rejuvenate a bit. I have to stay healthy enough to care for Di.

She is holding steady except her physical strength continues to diminish. I got her out of the house for the first time in a very long time (over a year - other than medical appointments). Our daughter's birthday was Friday, and we went to see her and take her a gift. We stayed about 2 hours. That was a significant effort for Di, but she managed with help.

Hard to believe our daughter is 56 years old! Yikes!!!

Anyway, just wanted to pass on her current status and, again, offer our thanks for everyone's support and kind words.

Wishing everyone the best and wishes for the best with your musical journeys.

Be safe and keeping post those terrific songs on the User's Forum. And wishes for success for those who create with BIAB but don't post on the forum.

I'm doing pretty good, all considered.

Alan & Di

Alan & Di, happy birthday to your daughter! Yes, birthdays can be surprising reminders, can't they? Don't know where the time goes, or how it gets there so fast...

Glad you are both doing well under the circumstances. Staying as active and focused as you can sounds like a good strategy for conserving your energy and being there for each other. Imagine that's easier for me to say than it is for you to do.

THANKS for the update! Miss you both and think of you often.

All the best, Ron

Alan, Updates are always welcome. Great to read Di was able to get out of the house for a few hours. I'm sure the visit lifted up everyone's spirits. My thoughts and prayers are with you and Di.

Here's a news item that might bring you encouragement. Former US President Jimmy Carter recently celebrated his 100th birthday and voted, all while receiving hospice care for more than a year.

A New Update:

Di just got home from a 17-day hospital stay. She had an aggressive UTI that turned into sepsis and E.coli. She had a couple of other minor issues. I won't bore you with the details, but the long-term picture isn't very promising. We do what we can as each day passes. Hospice is doing all they can. My time on the site has been hit and miss for a while, and will be for the foreseeable future.

We both appreciate the kind words everyone has left for us.

Hope everyone has a great 2025!

Alan & Di

And we appreciate you guys.
Stay strong and never lose hope.
--Steve

Alan, you and Di are in my prayers.
Be sure to take care of yourself as you take care of Di.

Alan, thank you for the update. Know you certainly have more important matters to tend to. Do take care of yourself as well so you can be there for Di. You and Di are in our thoughts and prayers.

Alan,

Keeping you and Di in my thoughts...

Bob

Sad to read this but we all appreciate the updates. Take care the best you can.

Thank you for the updates Alan. You and Di both have friends here to turn to for support. Good wishes to both of you my friend.

Our very best wishes to the both of you during such an extraordinarily difficult time. Janice mentioned today that she heard a song that reminded her of Di’s voice and that it brought her joy.

Bud

Update On Di- Not Looking Good

Di's dementia has become very aggressive, and her remaining time is getting very short. Her hospice nurse thinks it's just a matter of days, if not sooner

I'll update as things change. Thanks to all for your kind words along the way to this point.

Alan

You and Di are in my prayers.

Thanks for the update Al. My thoughts and prayers for both you and Di.

Alan...Just to let you know I'm thinking of you and praying for you and Di...sorry I haven't responded earlier but like you caring for my wife M'Len has captured my attention for the last 6 months...but perusing through the site today I caught your post...so just to let you know I'm thinking of you all just now...you're not alone! Dan

Alan,

Keeping you and Di in my thoughts...

Bob

Dear Alan,
I'm so sorry to read this post of yours.
With all my heart, I hope that Di's journey is as tranquil and as pleasant as possible for the two of you.
Thinking of both you and sending lots of peace your way.
--Noel

Alan,

I've come from listening to your latest showcase song - ab fab as always.

look after yourself.

Alan
My thoughts and prayers to Di and yourself.

“Grief is the price we pay for love.” — Queen Elizabeth II

May Di have a peaceful rest. Thinking of both of you.

Alan, keeping you and Di in my thoughts and prayers. Ron

Thanks Everyone. Di just got out of the hospital - again. The outlook is slightly better but still sad. The doctors are now saying they've managed a few contributing factors that will probably give her a few weeks rather than days. But there is little they can do to impede the progress of the dementia. Her kidneys are starting to fail and her ability to digest food is rapidly decreasing, triggering her brain to tell her she's not hungry. Thus, she eats very little, usually half a sandwich daily. Supplying nutrition by IV infusion would do more harm than good. These are all typical symptoms of end-stage dementia.

Di and I appreciate your thoughts, well wishes, and prayers. It's very comforting.

Best to all of you. I'll be over to the User's Forum as time permits.

Alan

Alan & Di,
You are in my thoughts.
Alan, no matter how much time is left, the main thing is that you are with her.