Originally Posted by dcuny
Hi, Marty.

Clever write, musical and well put together.

Love the mash up at the end.

Nice work! laugh
Thanks for mentioning the mashup, David. I think the idea there is finding the truth in the song through all the clutter. wink

Originally Posted by vicarn
Hullo Marty.
There's a lot of writing going on here.
I like the in depth lyric but my only nit here is the line ending in "sus".
Maybe "leaves me a little nonplussed" might be slicker. Not sure. Call me picky.
Your vocal could be brought up a tad in my ears.

Vic
Thanks for the suggestion, Vic. You would be a lot of fun to write with. I originally had something with nonplussed, but our granddaughter Charley tacitly suggested sus. She may not be as good of a collaborator, but she does hold more weight in the final. hehe For me my vocals have way too many cringe moments to stand out front.

Originally Posted by BYOBand
Hi Marty,
Guess we're in the mutual admiration society. Loved the message. Really liked your voice and that ending was great ear-candy. I don't mind "sus" but I'm curious what Vic's suggestion would sound like there.

Thanks, Beth. Glad I got the message through in that ending. It was tricky getting the two different melody lines to mesh, and I know it could be done better in more capapble hands. Truth. Note my reply to Vic above. That sus line originally ended with "...and I'm left nonplussed" to fit the same syllables.

Enjoy whatever happens!
marty

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@babumusic51
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