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Excellent collaboration!


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Complex.
Complexity in the write - both lyrically and melodically.
Complexity in the production.
Complexity in the arrangement.
A complex collaboration.

And it all gels. Perfectly.

COOL vocals.

Damn good Listening.

fj

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Originally Posted by dcuny
Hi, Ron and David.

Nice catchy pop! The guitars are nice and jangle, and the vocals sound great.

The focus of the lyrics keeps jumping which makes the pronoun game a bit hard to play a times. But overthinking lyrics on this sort of song is the wrong way to go. laugh

Fun listen.

THANKS, David! Yeah, the pronouns do meander a bunch, but I agree overthinking them is a mistake. Funny story (to me)...I shared David's description of Michael Stipe advocating for the role of gibberish in rock lyrics with my lyricist/brother. My lyricist later said he was struggling with adding lyrical gibberish. I told him not to worry about adding more gibberish, his normal level of gibberish was fine. Not sure how he took that. frown


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Ron,

You, your brother and David have done an incredible job.
This is a really solid write and an outstanding presentation.
The three of you should write some more.
The sound of musical talent is everywhere in my headphones right now!

--Noel


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Originally Posted by B.D.Thomas
Nice and catchy pop, sounds old and modern at the same time.
Kinda timeless.
Great vocals, and David's guitar work isn't shabby either smile

THANK YOU, B.D.! As we discussed this song and what we were going for, we referenced "timeless" songs and albums more than once. So...very cool to hear that word reflected back. I still dunno about the vocals, but David's guitars are transformative for sure. smile


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Cool pop song. Very 80s-ish.

The mix is not bad and it's a good choice of guitar real tracks....

Enjoyed it.


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Add nothing that adds nothing to the music.
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Originally Posted by jannesan
Great sounding indie rocker. Interesting lyrics, I guess something to do with hypocrites or wrong prophets, "we should eat some bark" - yeah sure wink
I enjoyed those dazzling guitars, tasty vocals and the clear mix.
Another great example how collaboration is more than the sum of its parts, now I'm looking forward to a whole album of this style of creativity.

Janne

THANKS, Janne! I'm a sucker for dazzling guitars, and these really do it for me, too. Who knows, maybe an album is out there somewhere? smile


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Originally Posted by Ghostgum
Enigmatic, puzzling, mysterious, intriguing. But, hey, who said we needed to know the answer to everything? Years ago, deciding that life's too short, I gave up wondering why "someone left the cake out in the rain."
Sinful Savior challenged my self-imposed rules about rhythm, reason and prosody and, surprisingly, stood the test. Well done.

Brian, THANK YOU! Glad you escaped from your listen none the worse for the cognitive wear. smile

Originally Posted by Ezekiel's Storm
I love it---all aspects of the song. Kudos to Dave's jingle jangle REM guitar sound. More please...

I'll double down on kudos to David's jingly jangle. Early REM was certainly a musical reference as we discussed the sound we were looking for. I'm still shaking my head in awe and wonder when I listen to these guitar parts...


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Originally Posted by Andrew Dee
Originally Posted by David Snyder
I said I don't know really but have you ever noticed there are some people in the world who can live the most decadent, sinful and amoral lives ever, but then they decide that they're going to adopt a new weird religion and start eating tree bark, and if you don't start eating tree bark and adopt the same weird religion then you're just a horrible person, and they're the most wonderful thing on the face of the Earth. And they should be in charge and you should bow down to them. Have you ever met people like that?
David and Ron
I've never heard of eating tree bark - is it a 'thing' or just a metaphor (or both).
Anyhow, it resulted in a great song!
Andrew

Andrew, THANKS! I'm not sure I'd ever heard of eating tree bark either, but it's a nice (and lyrically delicious) metaphor that supports David's concept. But truthfully, I'd recommend skipping the bark at dinner tonight. smile Glad you liked it!

Originally Posted by Izzy
emoji free

"Sinful Savior"! Forget your polished, pristine pop...

cheers

Izzy

Izzy, REALLY appreciate the enthusiastic and detailed review. Have spent more than a few minutes going over your notes and listening to the music of Mr Iver and Mr Smith (MONSTERS!). You're right, the bass could be punchier, that's on me. Your notes on the arrangement are insightful, and I'll take them to heart. FWIW, the "Joe says the forest's..." section before the outro is what I think of as the Bridge to Nowhere, as it follows a different harmonic scheme and melody than the verses, pre-chorus and chorus. One of the things I value in my brother's lyrics is his often-non-traditional structure, which often happily takes the song to non-traditional places. And so here we are! Glad you liked the tune, and took the time to offer suggestions on how to make it better.

Last edited by DC Ron; 06/04/25 03:01 PM.

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Originally Posted by rayc
Cool piece of Power pop.
The jangle is a bit out of control for the 1st minute. Needs a compressor that has a PIN DOWN setting for 12 string. Density is a good example.
Great guitar sounds and a very cool song.

Thanks, Ray! Wasn't familiar with the Density plugin but looks like it could be pretty handy. THANKS for the tip!


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"They walk on the carpet
And not holy water
They don’t go to heaven
But someplace much hotter"

Truth

We are big fans of "connect your own dots" lyrics and this is an excellent one.

Great vocal and ax performances.

Stadium filling!

J&B


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David, I really like this, some fab guitar and vocal work and the mix is damn good. Excellent collaboration, thank you sir!

Pete


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Man, I really, really, really love this song! Best thing I've heard today. I'll be listening multiple times, that's for sure. It sounds like somebody I can't place, maybe Marshall Crenshaw? Great collab, you guys need to do more like this! Way to GO!


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Originally Posted by WaoBand
Excellent collaboration!

Thanks, Chay!

Originally Posted by floyd jane
Complex.
Complexity in the write - both lyrically and melodically.
Complexity in the production.
Complexity in the arrangement.
A complex collaboration.

And it all gels. Perfectly.

COOL vocals.

Damn good Listening.

fj

THANK YOU, Floyd! Was a little worried about your "complex" comments until I got to the "gels perfectly" part. Whew! The tune took a few interesting twists and turns on its journey, glad it got somewhere enjoyable for you. smile

Last edited by DC Ron; 06/09/25 03:29 PM.

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Originally Posted by Noel96
Ron,

You, your brother and David have done an incredible job.
This is a really solid write and an outstanding presentation.
The three of you should write some more.
The sound of musical talent is everywhere in my headphones right now!

--Noel

Geez, Noel, that's awfully nice of you to say. I'm fortunate to have such talented collaborators here for sure!

Originally Posted by Guitarhacker
Cool pop song. Very 80s-ish.

The mix is not bad and it's a good choice of guitar real tracks....

Enjoyed it.

THANKS, Herb! But SURPRISE...NO REAL TRACK GUITARS on this one. Those are all RealDavid's. smile Yeah, we're standing on the shoulders of a couple of 80's giants on this one.


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Originally Posted by Janice & Bud
"They walk on the carpet
And not holy water
They don’t go to heaven
But someplace much hotter"

Truth

We are big fans of "connect your own dots" lyrics and this is an excellent one.

Great vocal and ax performances.

Stadium filling!

J&B

J&B, when ya'll enjoy one of our songs it's virtual SRO, so...the stadium is filled! THANKS for listening!


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Originally Posted by PeteMcN
David, I really like this, some fab guitar and vocal work and the mix is damn good. Excellent collaboration, thank you sir!

Pete

Pete, glad ya'll liked our tune. THANKS for listening! Ron


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So glad you and David got together. David is excellent to collaborate with. Excellent song. Super vocal and loved David's guitars. Lyrics were excellent as well. Well done


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Originally Posted by TuneMonger
Man, I really, really, really love this song! Best thing I've heard today. I'll be listening multiple times, that's for sure. It sounds like somebody I can't place, maybe Marshall Crenshaw? Great collab, you guys need to do more like this! Way to GO!

Thanks, Rob! Wouldn't have thought of Marshall, but...MAYBE? He's going to be in concert at a little venue I could walk to in November. Might have to check him out!


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Originally Posted by DC Ron
Originally Posted by TuneMonger
Man, I really, really, really love this song! Best thing I've heard today. I'll be listening multiple times, that's for sure. It sounds like somebody I can't place, maybe Marshall Crenshaw? Great collab, you guys need to do more like this! Way to GO!

Thanks, Rob! Wouldn't have thought of Marshall, but...MAYBE? He's going to be in concert at a little venue I could walk to in November. Might have to check him out!

Yeah, I was reaching, but it does remind me of someone. He's going to be at the Ram's Head in Annapolis which is quite near me, but I think his voice might be shot. He was struggling quite a few years back, I can't imagine it's improved. Might not be worth it. (Hope I'm wrong, I love the guy's music.)


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