Let's start at the beginning .. just my humble thoughts ..

"1) For my main vocal, I have been recording the main vocal on three tracks (3 separate records) and I try and get the phrasing and pitch across all three as consistent as possible"

Don't do that <grin>
Sing it once, mute that, then sing it again, intentionally not trying to duplicate what you just did.
Repeat.

Now sit down and listen to each one separately, noting sections of each that you like.
Then cut/paste a comp'd track of the best parts of each.

Trying to sing something exactly the same over and over will likely lead to less creativeness in how you approach the task.
This approach also allows you to learn how to 'work the mic' by not focusing on doing the same thing exactly the same over & over.
Expect a different result each time. That's the goal, so you have something to pick and choose from.

I do not work here, but the benefits are still awesome
Make your sound your own!