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rayc Offline OP
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Hello Folks,
this one will probably have Terry's vocals once he can get to it, (life is in the way at present).
V2
Dynamic changes in verse three. Tweak to the ending. Vocals a little more even & slightly louder - though, again, this will be Terry singing so I don't want to spend time on mine but will appease the chorus a little. Oh, I remembered to include the bvox in this one.
TTAW Version 2
V1
To Tilt At Windmills

The title probably is a nod to my last couple of song though the origin "worthy".
My main & harmony vocals are a guide for Terry but included here for completeness.
Terry's vocal texture is close to what is presented so that suggestions regarding mix tweaks would be appreciated.

BIAB components:
RealDrums popjazzfast
Right hand guitar 4162
Organ 3993
My parts:
Squire Mustang - guitars Left
Vantage Bass
Midi piano - piano roll written

LYRICS:
V1
Upstairs, downstairs
Too, too twain
Top floor, closed door
Same refrain.
New tears, old fears
Still unchanged.
Fraught night, blurred sight,
Rearranged.
C1
Walk, walk up the stairs
To tilt at windmills
No, no dragon slain
Walk, walk down again.
Though I've lost the plot
Of who who and what what
No, not what I am
But what I am not.

V2
Spoken unheard
Utterance
Written unread
Happenstance
New thought old ways
Open closed
Restart reject
Now deposed

C2

V3
Upstairs, downstairs
Two, too insane
Top floor,red door
We trained in vain.
New tears, pain sears
Still deranged.
Fraught night, old blight,
Now estranged.

C2
Walk, walk up the stairs
To tilt at windmills
No, no dragon slain
Walk, walk down again.
Though I've lost the plot
Of who who and what what
No, not what I am
But this misbegot.

Last edited by rayc; 07/25/25 07:27 PM.

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rayc
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Ray, like this a lot. The bass and left channel guitar are really popping. Especially like that opening bass section. Your progression is very slithery and cool, too. And I quite like your vocals and where you've placed them in the mix. Plus you used "misbegot" in your lyric, that's something. smile

Don't have a lot of input for changes. Maybe make the organ section at 2:30 an even more dramatic excursion before returning to your theme? Or not. Like it as-is just fine.


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Ray,

Love this sound. It has elements of punk, pop & rock. It sounds great turned up.

I also like where your vocals are placed in the mix. Excellent stuff!

You have a good one here!

Bob

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Ray - I love the staccato feel of the bass and guitar throughout and really suited the enigmatic chord progression. That midi piano solo hit the spot.

Suggestions? Maybe a different texture in the final verse - stripped back to drums, bass and vocal, then everything back in for the chorus. The outro - I found the held closing chord to almost feel out of place with the feel of the song - maybe a closing ‘shot’ might be more akin to the rest of the song? Dunno.

It took me back to listening to Madness, Split Enz and XTC - which I love all fondly.

Andrew

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Since you asked for, I will only address mixing for now:
  • there's humming from the bass amp audible during quieter passages
  • the bass has a lot of low end, which might be a problem with some playback systems
  • the snare could have a bit more body
  • I remember Terry's voice being a little brighter than yours, so you might need to duck the organ a little when he sings


Overall, the song sounds pretty good already [Linked Image - Only viewable when logged in]

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Really fun! I love the bounce of the lyrics/vocals, bass and guitar. I can't wait to hear it evolve but I already really like it. I second Andrew's reference to Madness and XTC.

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Sounds like a song with great potential. It reminds me some of Syd Barret's early material. My only criticism is the same as previously: you clearly favour subdued vocals, while I like to hear what's being sung.


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Hi, Ray.

Other than the usual request the vocals were more upfront, I've got nothing. I enjoyed the bass bopping along and the funky sound.


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Originally Posted by DC Ron
Ray, like this a lot. The bass and left channel guitar are really popping. Especially like that opening bass section. Your progression is very slithery and cool, too. And I quite like your vocals and where you've placed them in the mix. Plus you used "misbegot" in your lyric, that's something. smile
Don't have a lot of input for changes. Maybe make the organ section at 2:30 an even more dramatic excursion before returning to your theme? Or not. Like it as-is just fine.
Thanks DC,
I added some phasing etc to parts of the solo for variety.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by rsdean
Ray,
Love this sound. It has elements of punk, pop & rock. It sounds great turned up.
I also like where your vocals are placed in the mix. Excellent stuff!
You have a good one here!
Bob
Thanks Bob,
Yeah, it does need volume to BLOOM.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by Andrew Dee
Ray - I love the staccato feel of the bass and guitar throughout and really suited the enigmatic chord progression. That midi piano solo hit the spot.
Suggestions? Maybe a different texture in the final verse - stripped back to drums, bass and vocal, then everything back in for the chorus. The outro - I found the held closing chord to almost feel out of place with the feel of the song - maybe a closing ‘shot’ might be more akin to the rest of the song? Dunno.
It took me back to listening to Madness, Split Enz and XTC - which I love all fondly.
Andrew
Thanks Andrew,
I've done some work on the final verse, thinned it, but was wary of going too far as I've done that with several songs this year.
I've done a bit of what exists and as you suggested. My last song had a sudden ending and there were several complaints about it so opted for no going that way initially.
I saw Madness a couple of times & the same with XTC. Split Enz - I walked up to the door of their gig in Armidale Town hall 1976, (Phil Judd era), but was convinced to go to the pub instead by my companion - more fool me.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by B.D.Thomas
Since you asked for, I will only address mixing for now:
  • there's humming from the bass amp audible during quieter passages
  • the bass has a lot of low end, which might be a problem with some playback systems
  • the snare could have a bit more body
  • I remember Terry's voice being a little brighter than yours, so you might need to duck the organ a little when he sings

Overall, the song sounds pretty good already [Linked Image - Only viewable when logged in]
Thanks BD,
*there's humming from the bass amp audible during quieter passages - I don't hear it but will check. It's D.I.'d with no amp sims etc. There's an gate on the track as well...may be something else.
*the bass has a lot of low end, which might be a problem with some playback systems - I've done check listens on ear buds and cheap headphones &, so far, I'm getting away with it.
*the snare could have a bit more body - yeah, probably. It's a balancing act with a stereo Real Drum track. I'll have another go.
*I remember Terry's voice being a little brighter than yours, so you might need to duck the organ a little when he sings - yes, my voice in all mids & low mids. I've done some EQing to better match him but that sort of tweaking will have to wait for him.
Ta for the detail. I'll look, listen & learn.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by BYOBand
Really fun! I love the bounce of the lyrics/vocals, bass and guitar. I can't wait to hear it evolve but I already really like it. I second Andrew's reference to Madness and XTC.
Thanks BYOB,
You're very kind.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by WaoBand
Sounds like a song with great potential. It reminds me some of Syd Barret's early material. My only criticism is the same as previously: you clearly favour subdued vocals, while I like to hear what's being sung.
Syd's nice.
Vocal level is fairly high in this for MY voice. I sang this in Terry mode...quietly & close to the mic.


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rayc
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Originally Posted by dcuny
Hi, Ray.
Other than the usual request the vocals were more upfront, I've got nothing. I enjoyed the bass bopping along and the funky sound.
Barman, I'll have the usual! Nothing wrong with that.
Thanks Mr C.


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I liked this, both musically and lyrically. The overall volume seemed really low to me. The five users' songs I listened to before this one were much louder, and you won't believe how loud the song was that followed this on Soundcloud. Othwerwise, your usual brilliant work.


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Ray, this is a winner.
Super bass and guitar staccato.
I liked the drums as is, IMHO no need to change anything about them.
Nice ending!
I think your voice sounded excellent for this song but as usual I would have liked them louder, but that is just me.


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Since you call it a work in progress, I went to the V2 assuming it would show the most progress. Terry is a very is fine singer, but you know I enjoy your vocals, so I'm happy to hear the song at this stage. I REALLY like the bass. To me, it subtly drives the whole piece. Cool organ solo. You know, I'm not good at giving you advice or suggestions. I listened a couple times and nothing came to mind but a smile. SO don't change a thing.


Enjoy whatever happens!
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Diggin' this.

DRUMS sound great! Bass, too.
Nice rhythm guitar! (both sides). The left one (main one) is overly bright on my speakers - constantly pulling my ear from the vocal.
I quite like the vocal.

Tons of good stuff.

fj

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Originally Posted by TuneMonger
I liked this, both musically and lyrically. The overall volume seemed really low to me. The five users' songs I listened to before this one were much louder, and you won't believe how loud the song was that followed this on Soundcloud. Othwerwise, your usual brilliant work.
Thanks Mr Monger.
It was rendered at -14LufsM something I've been doing to ensure gain matching of versions.


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rayc
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