Originally Posted by RnAM
Very good song and nice vocals.
Nice story too.
As far as I'm concerned the "the bar was crowded" part is part of the verse. That is... I hear it as a verse, written like this:

He put his tools into the box
Looked at the wall with all the clocks
Threw his hardhat behind the seat
Then went to get something to eat
The bar was crowded
And the music was loud
And they were all getting rowdy

But... this is just the opinion of a simple Dutch girl smile

Anne-Marie

THANKS, Anne-Marie. Story songs are the best. Like your "part of the verse" structure. Not sold that you're just "a simple Dutch girl" though. Ha!
Originally Posted by floyd jane
Ron (& R.W.)

Really like your bed of drums&bass. And the steel "strings" to sweeten...
Nice "break".
I like how the vocals are processed. They sit perfectly to tell this story.
Cool bgvs. Nice Tight harmony!

Y'all are true originals.
There is something about this that reminds me of Paul Simon (if you mixed a little Elvis Costello into Paul) - a similar originality...

A good musical experience. Thanks for that...

fj

THANKS, Floyd! As a teen, Paul Simon was one of my songwriting heroes, and a few years later, so was Elvis. We're very happy to be anywhere in the same zip code as those two musically, even if far fetched. Glad you enjoyed the song!

DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
Presonus Studio One
ASUS I9-12900K DAW, 32 GB RAM
Presonus Faderport 16
Too many guitars (is that a thing?)