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Ha! Rhyming "table" with "Babel" gets a gold star right there. My daughter looked up and asked "Dad, are you going to tell him they don't rhyme?" the second time around. She knows me too well. But because you know better, and did it anyway... heck, two gold stars!  I'll even ignore the WTF-is-the-drum-doing ending!  Great write by your brother, and excellent everything else by you. 👍
-- David Cuny My virtual singer development blogVocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?BiaB 2025 | Windows 11 | Reaper | Way too many VSTis.
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Hmm, kinda reminded me of the verse section of Squeeze's Take Me, I'm Yours. Def interesting lyrics. Always good vocals, especially those harmonies. Good stuff once again! THANKS, Rob! Y'know, I LOVE Squeeze and Glenn Tilbrook's melodies are DIVINE. And "Take Me, I'm Yours" is a BANGER of a song that I know very well. But I'm not hearing much in common between the two songs. Not that sounding like "Take Me, I'm Yours" would be a bad thing to me. I'd LOVE to write a song like that. But I don't think I have in this case. Glad you enjoyed the tune!
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
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Hi Ron,
First those repeated lines you asked about are a refrain. Refrains are repetitive 2 or 3 lines at the end of certain similar passages. their job is to create continuity to the message and generate a memorable slice of the song. Where a bridge is a single appearance of a few lines that brings all the different elements of the song together from a slightly different POV, A refrain further explains the storyline with repetitive appearances in the same respective places throughout the song. It reminds the listener of the basic theme of the lyrics, evoking a sense of familiarity. That's the non-technical, relatively short version. All that said, I have no formal musical training whatsoever - neither read nor write notation. So,taje that into consideration. But, that's how I've always treated these "inserts".
OK, that out of the way:
This is a very interesting song. Not a typical arrangement - but it's great - so, a nice change from the expected. The remarkable story you've created makes you wonder how many times situations like this come and go. Your mixes are always spot on- everything when and where it should be and at the proper volume. You know your stuff, my friend!
Nothing to complain about - except I didn't write it. Dang!
Take care, Ron.
Alan THANKS, Alan! I like "refrain", that makes a lot of sense to me. The serendipity of how relationships form (and perhaps more often miss forming) is a topic I ponder quite a bit. Probably why I love these lyrics. THANKS for sharing your thoughts and for not complaining. 
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
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I can visualize the entire scene with your excellent storytelling. Good chorus. And as I have come to expect from you, excellent BGVs.
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Ron, this is a great song. Super backing tracks. Your vocal was very strong. Loved those lyrics. Really great drums.
Great mix.
Loved it.
Back in my day the only time we started panic buying was when the bartender shouted "last call"!
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
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Ha! Rhyming "table" with "Babel" gets a gold star right there. My daughter looked up and asked "Dad, are you going to tell him they don't rhyme?" the second time around. She knows me too well. But because you know better, and did it anyway... heck, two gold stars! I'll even ignore the WTF-is-the-drum-doing ending! Great write by your brother, and excellent everything else by you. 👍 David, appreciate the gold stars, but elected to change the pronunciation and repost. THANKS to you and your daughter for your careful attention to detail, and for bringing it to my attention.
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
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Really entertaining story-song, and so nicely produced. Thoroughly enjoyed my listen! Thanks, Tom! Always enjoy a good story-song myself. Cool one, Ron. Wasn't sure where the title would take us, but you did an amazing job. I'm not big on genre or song part designation. Just write. The bar was crowded part, although I agree most would call it pre-chorus; it's just a great part.
Serious, I really like the way you build your songs, and this one is solid construction for sure. Fun story, and Joe is the hero and waitress is the heroine. Thank you for the vote of confidence, Marty! Fun little character sketch, and I love how the lyrics bring these two to life, and we suppose together, in so few words.
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
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Hi Ron,
What a truly lovely song! You sing it beautifully, have a really good voice (haven't I said that before?), and you tells a strong story. It's a song that leaves you with a smile on your face, and a little sad too.
Powerful, fun lines about the Tower of Babel and that busy café. Great idea!
Enjoyed this song too, Ron. Like all your songs, I mean.
Best regards,
Hans
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I really like the pedal steel arrangements. Good song, but the guy will have to come back next week if I understand correctly.
Laurent Laurent, ha! Well, I guess he MIGHT. But it is a bit ambiguous, isn't it? Love ambiguity. THANKS for listening!
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
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Great song, Ron. Superb production, plus the instrumentation and arrangement was exactly right for the song. Great backing vocals, too. Thanks, Chay. Appreciate the listen!
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
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Hi Ron
“A Forge, A Waitress, and A Jukebox Song,” feels like I've stumbling onto a story that I didn’t know I needed to hear.
The song paints a slice-of-life scene inside a working-class bar, focusing on two weary characters—a blue-collar worker and a woman seeking escape. Their interaction is grounded in realism and emotional subtlety. The recurring refrain about the crowded, loud bar underscores the sense of isolation within noise and chaos, while the “song on the jukebox” cleverly mirrors the characters’ unspoken loneliness. I suspect that many of us can relate to this synopsis.
Production-wise, everything just fits like a nicely crafted piece of music carried by good vocals, both main and backing vox.✔️🆗
As promised, there are no robot servants or tales of dementia here—just good, honest, blue-collar angst.
I like this song, It's a delightfully human slice of life, proving that you only need great apes—not AI—to write simple stories about guys who definitely need to work on their table manners.🙄
Another excellent thought provoking song from Team Davis. 👍
Izzy. THANKS, Izzy. Blue collar angst is the best. Appreciate the listen and entertaining review.
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
Presonus Studio One
ASUS I9-12900K DAW, 32 GB RAM
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Very different! And very cool. Good vocal, and I especially like the BGV's. Nice to hear you playing too, short but sweet Excellent mix as per usual. Good one, Ron, I enjoy your music. Thanks, Dave. I'm not a shredder but occasionally feel a guitar part that needs to be heard. In this song, the intro, break and outro uniquely include the C-D-F-G progression, and the break spoke to me in the context of the song. THANKS for noticing! Glad you enjoyed the song and our music.
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
Presonus Studio One
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Wow, very cool man! Has an R.E.M. vibe, especially in the lyrics. Great job. Love the instrumentation and the build and the mix.
Awesome.
Note on my posts: I listen to these wonderful and varied forum songs for pure enjoyment as part of my daily “radio,” in large chunks, while I am out and about. Then I post all my thoughts later, not on the spot. As I do not think the forum is a place for competitiveness, I will shy away from any critiques from now on. I come here for peace and enjoyment only and have no ego invested. Thank you. THANKS, David. Yeah, early REM definitely resonates with me and I presume echoes through a lot of our music. Fun to build these softer songs when anything other than a gentle touch will send it careening off the rails. Appreciate the listen and response!
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
Presonus Studio One
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Unusual but entirely catchy. If I knew more about music I could probably give you more helpful feedback, pointing out the things/parts that really worked as many of our more musician-ee friends do. I can say that I really admire how you work magic around difficult words/phrases. Seems you give the story priority over ease of fitting in the chord structure, but somehow it always, always works and just sounds cool. I hope that makes sense. Thank you for the listen, Beth. If I knew more about music I'd probably wax poetic about the harmonic role of certain SUS chords or something technical like that. But instead I'll just say I'm really grateful for your comments as they perfectly reflect how I think about my role in bringing these lyrics to life. So, just...thank you.
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
Presonus Studio One
ASUS I9-12900K DAW, 32 GB RAM
Presonus Faderport 16
Too many guitars (is that a thing?)
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Very good song and nice vocals. Nice story too. As far as I'm concerned the "the bar was crowded" part is part of the verse. That is... I hear it as a verse, written like this: He put his tools into the box Looked at the wall with all the clocks Threw his hardhat behind the seat Then went to get something to eat The bar was crowded And the music was loud And they were all getting rowdy But... this is just the opinion of a simple Dutch girl Anne-Marie
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Great song, Ron! My listening highlight is the section at 2:00 ‘She brought him something on a plate’ - those BVs!
I’ve seen you write before about your brother’s material - this listen made me wonder … how do you choose your next song? Does your brother specify? Do you spin the roulette wheel, or do you re-read and choose one that jumps out? I’m in admiration for anyone that can take the lyrics first path and craft the music to suit.
Great song!
Andrew Thanks, Andrew! Yeah, that unison BGV followed by the same line with a 2nd unison voice on top is a cool effect. Know we've had a longer conversation on this offline, but for others...I choose which song to post from our catalog based on variety and what I think (hope?) listeners will enjoy. If my brother ever asks for a song to be posted I'll certainly do it. Once he told me in advance that a certain lyric could never be posted, so I crafted a song I could post out of devilish fun. That was "Epiphany".
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
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Ron (& R.W.)
Really like your bed of drums&bass. And the steel "strings" to sweeten...
Nice "break".
I like how the vocals are processed. They sit perfectly to tell this story.
Cool bgvs. Nice Tight harmony!
Y'all are true originals.
There is something about this that reminds me of Paul Simon (if you mixed a little Elvis Costello into Paul) - a similar originality...
A good musical experience. Thanks for that...
fj
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Hi Ron. I thoroughly enjoyed this. You and your brother certainly are a songwriting powerhouse!. As others have mentioned, the title really engages a person's imagination. It made me wonder what the song was going to be about. I often read the lyrics to songs before I listen. With this one, however, I didn't want to spoil the effect of the title and its meaning. I'm glad I chose that approach. I did not anticipate this story line at all. Your music, performance and production along with your brother's lyrics kept me fully engaged throughout Loved it! --Noel P.S. Regarding those repeated lines... As J&B and Alan have noted, this is called a refrain. And as Anne-Marie has said, it's usually attached to a verse somewhere. It's a term that comes from poetry and it's easy to find information about it on the internet. In songwriting, it is a lyric technique that has been used by many famous composers in many famous songs. Somewhere Over The Rainbow has a refrain at the beginning of each A-section. In this case, the refrain doubles as the title and hook. A couple of famous songs that come to mind as I'm typing this that use a refrain at the end of each section are Dream Lover and Close To You. I've actually used variations of the "Close To You" approach to lyric writing in my own songs a number of times. The basic principle of Close To You is that each A-section follows a similar pattern to the one shown below. "Close To You" by Burt Bacharach and Hal David
Lyric format in each A-section
verse information line 1
verse information line 2
refrain line 1
refrain line 2
refrain line 3 Personally, I've found it to be a very productive way to write lyrics while minimising the angst caused by writing lyrics. By keeping the refrain constant in each of the three A-sections, only 6 lines of verse lyrics are needed to complete all three A-sections. By adding an extra 4 lines for the B (bridge, middle 8) section, a complete song can be written with 10 different lines of lyrics! I like this (not counting the refrain) It's a technique that I often use when I write lyrics without any instrument present. My song Summer Moon used this approach. You'll be able to see the words on Soundcloud. I used a 2-line refrain. This technique let me write the lyrics for this song while I was in hospital getting over complications caused by prostate cancer back in 2018.
MY SONGS...Audiophile BIAB 2026
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Firstly, we love open mixes like this.
Very, very good vocals and the ah’s came in at such a perfect time in the fine lyric
We were transported inside that bar with the sights, sounds and even smells! 😆
The band and your standout guitar work are great.
That background steel was very nice.
Enjoyed it!
J&B
PS:Anyone know what "The bar was crowded..." section should be called?
We're calling it a "pre-chorus," but it shows up between verses, too, so...curious minds want to know.
We’ve used that a lot and always referred to it as a refrain. J&B, THANK YOU for the listen and the nice review. Those BiaB steels almost always sound SO nice to me, I have to make an effort to not use them on everything. "Refrain" has a nice ring to it, I like it!
DC Ron
BiaB Audiophile
Presonus Studio One
ASUS I9-12900K DAW, 32 GB RAM
Presonus Faderport 16
Too many guitars (is that a thing?)
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Hey Ron,
This is the first of your songs I've heard, so I don't know if it's an indication of a recurring style or unique to this song. I like it! It has a Tom Petty feel to my ear. It certainly isn't a cookie cutter tune... very uniquely crafted and interesting! Your mix is very clear and cleverly assembled. Your use of realtracks is very well done and I like your vocals... all in all I'd call this a home run. It's one those that makes me want to keep listening over and over.
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