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#509023 - 12/12/18 04:37 PM [User Showcase] Ghosts That Never Lived
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 1181
Loc: Virginia USA
Ezekiel's Storm Offline
Expert

Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 1181
Loc: Virginia USA
Ghosts That Never Lived

This is my latest composition about a person struggling with the choices she made. I used the Style FPBTSSW (Two Swing Fingerpicked Guitars Slow) and added some other instrumentation.

Real Tracks:
BB RealGuitar 1678 Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking Country
BB RealStrings 527 Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking Hank
BB RealBass 535 Bass, Electric, Pop
BB RealDrums-NashvilleSwing8^2-SideStck,Ride
RT2505 Piano, Electric, HeldChords
RC1705 Guitar, Electric, Soloist CountryBrent
RT2337 Violin, Background, PopHigh Ev 085



She pulls the curtain
To hide from the night
Doesn’t want the morning to come
They always told her that she had the right

She knows her heart will never forgive
She cries for ghosts that never lived
That never lived

She’s waiting for him
To walk through the door
Loud lamentations to come
Her bed is empty, so she sleeps on the floor

She know her heart will never forgive
She cries for ghosts that never lived
That never lived

She claims he loved her
He swears it’s in her head
She’s breathing in all the words
That he could have said

She hangs her head down
Her heart is crystalline
No summertime playgrounds to come
Somebody told her everything would work out fine

She know her heart will never forgive
She cries for ghosts that never lived
That never lived

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#509075 - 12/12/18 10:45 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 3958
Loc: Sacramento, California
dcuny Offline
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Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 3958
Loc: Sacramento, California
Well done - you've got some evocative language there! Nicely sung and produced. It's a sparse arrangement, but very effective, like when the fiddle comes in for the last verse.

One nit - it seems like there's an effect on your voice - doubling, chorus, or perhaps an ambient reverb - that doesn't really seem to fit. I think the vocal would sound a lot better without it.

Anyway, I enjoyed the listen. smile
_________________________
-- David Cuny
My virtual singer development blog

Vocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?

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#509104 - 12/13/18 03:41 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: dcuny]
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 1181
Loc: Virginia USA
Ezekiel's Storm Offline
Expert

Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 1181
Loc: Virginia USA
Originally Posted By: dcuny
Well done - you've got some evocative language there! Nicely sung and produced. It's a sparse arrangement, but very effective, like when the fiddle comes in for the last verse.

One nit - it seems like there's an effect on your voice - doubling, chorus, or perhaps an ambient reverb - that doesn't really seem to fit. I think the vocal would sound a lot better without it.

Anyway, I enjoyed the listen. smile


Thanks for the listen and your response. I agree with you about the vocal. I am not quite satisfied with it. Thanks for pointing out the possible causes.

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#509121 - 12/13/18 04:53 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 9036
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
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Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 9036
Loc: Florida
Very nice! A good write - fresh, original, well-penned.

Nice arrangement and an excellent mix. Super vocal (I did not mind the effect at all). Really nice harmonies, too.

The only "distraction" I found was the second half of the guitar solo. The first half was nice - fit the song...but in the second half it got a bit "busy" and it was as though the guitar guy was "showing off" - which seemed inappropriate for such a gentle, thoughtful song.

I really liked this.

fj

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#509243 - 12/13/18 01:37 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 9966
Loc: GA USA
Janice & Bud Offline
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Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 9966
Loc: GA USA
"She knows her heart will never forgive
She cries for ghosts that never lived
That never lived"

Great lines!!

The vocal, write and arrangement are all in the pocket. It sounds very nice on our monitors.

Enjoyed it!

J&B

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#509266 - 12/13/18 02:47 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 06/28/06
Posts: 7111
Loc: Scottish Highlands
furry Offline
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Registered: 06/28/06
Posts: 7111
Loc: Scottish Highlands
I can picture this lady as it's happening. Great song

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#509287 - 12/13/18 03:53 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 06/09/16
Posts: 2991
Robertkc Offline
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Registered: 06/09/16
Posts: 2991
A good story in the write -the chorus lyric is especially memorable as J&B mentioned.
I like your vocals -they are always resonant and well mixed ( no problem on the harmonies- for me they aren`t obtrusive).
The arrangement is straightforward - it works well for the song.
Enjoyed!

Robert

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#509382 - 12/14/18 02:19 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 04/13/16
Posts: 2782
Loc: Stanwell Park NSW Australia
rayc Offline
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Registered: 04/13/16
Posts: 2782
Loc: Stanwell Park NSW Australia
It's almost the complete package - except for the reverb as mentioned.
the easiest way I've found to get things "in the same room" is to use the same reverb on all instruments with it - varying the degree a little only. The reverb within BIAB is hard to match so I've found exporting dry is the safest option.
Sweet sad song.
_________________________
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
Pop on over to The Recording Rebels for positive, honest commentary, critiques and support. https://therecordingrebels.com

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#509410 - 12/14/18 04:33 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 02/03/16
Posts: 1320
Loc: Germany
Crossroads Offline
Expert

Registered: 02/03/16
Posts: 1320
Loc: Germany
Hi Ezekiel,

a very beautiful and touching song - bothe lyrics and melody.I liked the solo a lot the way it is. Great job.

Cheers, Stefan

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#509418 - 12/14/18 05:34 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 02/15/17
Posts: 3414
Deryk - PG Music Offline
PG Music Staff

Registered: 02/15/17
Posts: 3414
Nice work on this one smile I really enjoyed your lyrics on this, and the sparse instrumentation helped them hit all the harder. Some solid vocals on this too. It is definitely attention grabbing, and I loved the haunting and sad atmosphere it sets.

Really well done - thanks for sharing!
_________________________
Cheers,
Deryk

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#509498 - 12/14/18 10:42 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 06/16/00
Posts: 1944
Loc: Texas
Jim Offline
Expert

Registered: 06/16/00
Posts: 1944
Loc: Texas
You've created a nicely written piece expressing personal regret...
I really like the melody you've chosen to enhance the lyrical content...
Simplicity in arrangement... Good job & very effective.
I must say I enjoyed the performance!
_________________________
Jim
†=☮&♥

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#509508 - 12/14/18 11:05 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 07/11/15
Posts: 3200
Loc: Missouri
Torrey Bliss Offline
Veteran

Registered: 07/11/15
Posts: 3200
Loc: Missouri
Ezekiel's Storm, very nice song and a great job on the vocals and bgvocals!! You always put up good stuff!! Thanks, T
_________________________
Torrey Bliss
www.soundcloud.com/torrey-bliss



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#509534 - 12/14/18 12:55 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 08/09/10
Posts: 4440
Loc: New York
rsdean Offline
Veteran

Registered: 08/09/10
Posts: 4440
Loc: New York
Great song. Love the lyrics and vocal.

Excellent!

Bob
_________________________
SoundCloud Tracks


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#509543 - 12/14/18 01:39 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: dcuny]
Registered: 12/21/13
Posts: 6131
Loc: Davis, CA
Greg Johnson Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/21/13
Posts: 6131
Loc: Davis, CA
Originally Posted By: dcuny
Well done - you've got some evocative language there! Nicely sung and produced. It's a sparse arrangement, but very effective, like when the fiddle comes in for the last verse.

One nit - it seems like there's an effect on your voice - doubling, chorus, or perhaps an ambient reverb - that doesn't really seem to fit. I think the vocal would sound a lot better without it.

Anyway, I enjoyed the listen. smile


I agree with David on both counts....very nice song with some cool ideas!! The effect on this style of song seems too much. Nice work!! Take care. Greg

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#509559 - 12/14/18 03:13 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 12/06/03
Posts: 4021
Loc: Sydney Australia
PeterF Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/06/03
Posts: 4021
Loc: Sydney Australia
Pretty song nice arrangement.
Nice work.

Peter

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#509594 - 12/14/18 04:55 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 03/07/18
Posts: 2522
Rustyspoon# Offline
Veteran

Registered: 03/07/18
Posts: 2522
Very easy and enjoyable listen.
Great vocals. I liked the way vocals and bass had found their very own, distant frequency space on this tune and yet sounded nicely as a whole.

Thank you for sharing,
Misha.

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#509650 - 12/14/18 11:39 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 12/10/09
Posts: 962
Loc: Washington State
bluage Offline
Expert

Registered: 12/10/09
Posts: 962
Loc: Washington State
Dear "Ezekial's Storm"...

There is something almost mysterious about your lyrics for "Ghosts That Never Lived". As I interpreted them, the woman who is the subject of your song seems to live with a dream that could be mistaken for a memory, or vice-versa. There's something subtly unreal about it, which makes the poetry in your lines stand out as luminously as a newly-discovered land:

"Her heart is crystalline
No summertime playgrounds to come..."


Beautiful and evocative writing. Your Real Tracks as heard through your composition have a gentle, sundown feel to them that, though somewhat sad-sounding, nonetheless are soothing to listen to. I liked the vocal harmony, too.

Sweet, soulful songwriting this is, "Ezekial's Storm"!

Truly,

LOREN
_________________________
"Music is what feelings sound like."-- borrowed from a Cakewalk Music Creator forum member, "Mamabear".

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#509680 - 12/15/18 03:51 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 12/08/11
Posts: 5557
Loc: Edmonton, Ab, Canada
Scott C Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/08/11
Posts: 5557
Loc: Edmonton, Ab, Canada
Super vocal. Really like the effects used with your vocal. Very nice backtrack fits the vocal perfectly. L:oved the tele twang on the guitar solo..

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#509728 - 12/15/18 07:08 AM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 04/03/09
Posts: 7438
Guitarhacker Offline
Veteran

Registered: 04/03/09
Posts: 7438
Ghosts that never lived. This can be taken so many ways. My thoughts went to the children that never make it the full 9 months to be born for one reason or another . It is so common and it really haunts you for your life when you lose a child in this manner.

Good song.
_________________________
You can find my music at:
www.herbhartley.com

Add nothing that adds nothing to the music.


As the sword chooses the warrior, so too, the song chooses the writer.

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#509839 - 12/15/18 02:41 PM [User Showcase] Re: Ghosts That Never Lived [Re: Ezekiel's Storm]
Registered: 05/16/17
Posts: 1484
beatmaster Offline
Expert

Registered: 05/16/17
Posts: 1484
Nice arrangement and an excellent mix with a nice mellow vocal that enhances the song.

Thanks
_________________________
win 10 64 bit 16gb, ssd 500gb, Alesis multimix8 usb,ketron sd,Roland BK-7M, 1000,shure sm7b,sonar,acid,mixcraft, variety of plugins.Sample tank 3, TC Helicon Voicelive 3 2 ,Byerdynamic 770 pro, akg k270,akg k701.
https://beatmaster1.bandcamp.com/releases

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