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#586771 - 03/21/20 01:40 AM [User Showcase] Be Sure and Stay
Registered: 02/20/10
Posts: 1198
Loc: Maryland
TuneMonger Offline
Expert

Registered: 02/20/10
Posts: 1198
Loc: Maryland
https://soundcloud.com/user-770148857/be-sure-and-stay

Just a very simple song, not much to it really...

Style is _JIBBER.STY (Jibber Americana Folk Pop)

RealTracks in style: 2877:Bass, Acoustic, AmericanaSlow16thsByron Ev16 060
RealTracks in style: 1534:Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm PopPowerPush8ths Ev 120
RealTracks in style: 3080:Mandolin, Rhythm AmericanaPop8thsAndy Ev 100
RealTracks in style: 3027:Vocal Oohs, Background Pop3-part Ev 085
RealDrums [in style:NashvillePop16^1-a:Snare, Hihat , b:Snare, Ride

Vocals are by a woman on fiverr who prefers to be unnamed

Lyrics:
I never thought that you could love me
I always thought that I'd be blue
Who'd a thunk a girl like me'd end up with you?
I wonder if you'll stay forever,
At least until I'm old and grey,
Then you can go do whatever, be on your way
I think that there's a force amazing in this universe of ours
That sets us on the course we're waging, will make us happy, joyful lovers
I know the things you like to do are,
Very different than mine,
It's okay to run away
If you're back in time
I'd like to take a trip together,
Somewhere that the weather's fine,
Or it could be gray and gloomy, I won't mind
There are quirky things about me,
Seems to me that you don't care,
Nothing that I've done has gotten in your hair
I think that there's a force amazing in this universe of ours
That sets us on the course we're waging, will make us happy, joyful lovers
That part about when we get older,
When we've gotten worn and gray,
Truth is I was only joking,
Be sure and stay.

Be sure and stay.
_________________________
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#586779 - 03/21/20 01:58 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 12/08/11
Posts: 5674
Loc: Edmonton, Ab, Canada
Scott C Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/08/11
Posts: 5674
Loc: Edmonton, Ab, Canada
Simple song super vocal. Loved the backtrack

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#586783 - 03/21/20 02:32 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 04/13/16
Posts: 2895
Loc: Stanwell Park NSW Australia
rayc Offline
Veteran

Registered: 04/13/16
Posts: 2895
Loc: Stanwell Park NSW Australia
The woman doesn't want more work?
This song is an excellent work demo for her.
Lovely vocal, lyrics and backing.
Did you write the melody?

I'm always surprised by the American version of English's subtle differences when compared to the version I've grown with.
Where you write
"Very different than mine,"
I'd write
"Very different to mine"
and
when you write
"Be sure and stay."
I'd write "Be sure to stay."

No impact on the song but interestingly different.
_________________________
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rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
Pop on over to The Recording Rebels for positive, honest commentary, critiques and support. https://therecordingrebels.com

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#586785 - 03/21/20 03:14 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 11/30/07
Posts: 3721
Loc: Ontario, Canada
BlueAttitude Offline
Veteran

Registered: 11/30/07
Posts: 3721
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Good writing, and she has a good voice. Nicely done!

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#586808 - 03/21/20 07:18 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 9156
Loc: Florida
floyd jane Offline
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Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 9156
Loc: Florida
"I think that there's a force amazing in this universe of ours
That sets us on the course we're waging, will make us happy, joyful lovers"

Nice writing!

A really nice song. Very well done.

Good vocals - well mixed.
Good backing tracks - also well mixed.

A really enjoyable listen...

fj

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#586821 - 03/21/20 08:10 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 02/03/16
Posts: 1320
Loc: Germany
Crossroads Offline
Expert

Registered: 02/03/16
Posts: 1320
Loc: Germany
Hi TuneMonger,

simple? Maybe, if compared to some others. But less good? Oh no, just on the contrary. VERY nice and cool tune, superbly arranged.

And that lascivious lady doesn't want her name to be published? Ha, I'm sure she's Marilyn Monroe's granddaughter. Oh boy, TuneMonger, you really were lucky to find her for singing your song.

Just top-notch - love it!

All the best and stay healthy!

Stefan

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#586825 - 03/21/20 08:32 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 09/30/16
Posts: 998
Loc: Netherlands, Haarlem
Birchwood Offline
Expert

Registered: 09/30/16
Posts: 998
Loc: Netherlands, Haarlem
Hello Tunemonger,

It's amazing what sweet vocals can add to a -relative- simple song. In a way nothing happens, no chorus, no bridges or whatever and still you hear a good song. One you have to pay attention to. I've listened to it several times, but that didn't changed my opinion. That means it's a good song...

Hans
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(Birchwood)
https://soundcloud.com/user-296497130

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#586826 - 03/21/20 08:38 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 06/05/12
Posts: 710
jptjptjpt Offline
Journeyman

Registered: 06/05/12
Posts: 710
A simple song but those are always the best songs. I love this song! It's so 60s. It something Nancy Sinatra could have sang. Outstanding writing and absolutely great vocals.

"I think that there's a force amazing in this universe of ours..."

Brilliant line.
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#586828 - 03/21/20 08:42 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 09/09/17
Posts: 723
Loc: Virginia
Belladonna Offline
Journeyman

Registered: 09/09/17
Posts: 723
Loc: Virginia
Really nice sweet song. The singer's vocals fit the lyrics perfectly. Reminds me of some of the early 60s songs. She has a cute voice. Nice write!!

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#586905 - 03/21/20 02:00 PM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 4140
Loc: Sacramento, California
dcuny Offline
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Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 4140
Loc: Sacramento, California
Simple song? The best kind! smile

Good find with the singer - she did an excellent job here.
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My virtual singer development blog

Vocal control, you say. Never heard of it. Is that some kind of ProTools thing?

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#586958 - 03/21/20 04:54 PM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 02/20/10
Posts: 1198
Loc: Maryland
TuneMonger Offline
Expert

Registered: 02/20/10
Posts: 1198
Loc: Maryland
Thanks all, I appreciate the kind words about this one. I can't explain why my songs are either full of alcohol and angst or fluffy like this one. I don't know why. I'm glad everyone enjoyed the vocals, when I was auditioning demos, I heard hers and I said "That's it!" Her wish to be anonymous may be contractual, that has been the case with a couple other people I used on fiverr. There are several American Idol finalists on fiverr and airgig, just to let people know. They usually want more money than I want to put out, but are still pretty reasonable considering their talent. Anyway, thanks again!
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#586966 - 03/21/20 05:26 PM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 06/09/16
Posts: 3054
Robertkc Offline
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Registered: 06/09/16
Posts: 3054
An excellent write- the melody so strong (its catchy familiarity part of the charm!) I didn`t notice the lack of a chorus `til the end.
The singer takes some of the "fluff" out of the song which gives it a modern/sexy twist.
Cool.

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#586972 - 03/21/20 05:50 PM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 03/07/18
Posts: 2688
Rustyspoon# Offline
Veteran

Registered: 03/07/18
Posts: 2688
TuneMonger,
I like it! It can probably be mixed somewhat better, but overall the tune is awesome and catchy. Vocals of your mystery singer are spot on. Fun!

Thank you for sharing!

Misha.

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#587063 - 03/22/20 08:47 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 05/27/19
Posts: 878
Loc: Dallas, PA, USA
BabuMusic Online   content
Expert

Registered: 05/27/19
Posts: 878
Loc: Dallas, PA, USA
A simple song? A wonderfully and refreshingly simple song, with soul-touching lyrics sung by a sweet and sensual soul. Simply superb, TuneMonger!
_________________________
Enjoy whatever happens!
marty

Babu Music on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLDrsXTXfShgnGalQZ0ElQw
Me on SoundCloud: https://soundcloud.com/marty-straub

My website: http://martystraub.com/

using Band in a Box, Reaper & Cakewalk

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#587130 - 03/22/20 03:29 PM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 10175
Loc: GA USA
Janice & Bud Offline
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Registered: 12/05/11
Posts: 10175
Loc: GA USA
You found a great vocalist for your excellent lyric!

Simple and sweet and well produced.

At the risk of sounding trite there is a LOT
to like here. Really.

And we like that song structure also. A bit
different in a refreshing way.

Kudos!!

J&B
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#587360 - 03/23/20 09:44 PM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 04/23/18
Posts: 981
Loc: Mill Valley, California USA
Deej56 Offline
Expert

Registered: 04/23/18
Posts: 981
Loc: Mill Valley, California USA
TuneMonger,

Cool tune, terrific write—a nice throwback feel to this but still contemporary. Great lines in this one. Couldn’t stop listening to this—that vocal is so engaging. Just real nice balance to this. And the prosody and internal rhyme on that chorus really sells it. Great work!

All my best,

Deej

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#587404 - 03/24/20 02:53 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 12/29/12
Posts: 5480
Loc: Originally Missouri ... Now Al...
Al-David Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/29/12
Posts: 5480
Loc: Originally Missouri ... Now Al...
High TM ...

Your singer really nailed it for you! Of course, she had a great composition to work with. I enjoyed this a bunch. Wishing you ther very best ...

Alan
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#587525 - 03/24/20 02:45 PM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 12/21/13
Posts: 6222
Loc: Davis, CA
Greg Johnson Offline
Veteran

Registered: 12/21/13
Posts: 6222
Loc: Davis, CA
Fantastic!! This has an irresistible groove and melody! Singer is great! This would be great for a film......it is catchy, whimsical, and JUST PLAIN GOOD!!! Love it!! Take care. Greg

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#588529 - 03/29/20 02:10 PM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 02/20/10
Posts: 1198
Loc: Maryland
TuneMonger Offline
Expert

Registered: 02/20/10
Posts: 1198
Loc: Maryland
Wow, I didn't expect this tune to get such great comments here! Thanks all! Of course, everyone here is positive and supportive, which makes it an easy place to be. So great we have this forum, especially right now when we all must isolate. I've seen some comments on other threads like, "Boredom is not something the forum users know." That is so true. When I'm not working on tunes, I'm writing a novel. I'm sure it will only be an electronic self-publish, but I'm determined to complete it. I am never bored. Thanks again, all, for keeping me motivated! (Criticism is fine, too, only way I'm going to learn.)
_________________________
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#588617 - 03/30/20 12:26 AM [User Showcase] Re: Be Sure and Stay [Re: TuneMonger]
Registered: 12/10/09
Posts: 976
Loc: Washington State
bluage Offline
Expert

Registered: 12/10/09
Posts: 976
Loc: Washington State
‘Tunemonger’…

Ohhh, I LIKE this song, Be Sure and Stay (an instantly memorable title, by the way)!!! It’s a delighful, distinctive, lovely thing to listen to. It seems to combine, or blend, the kind of dreamy, heavenly, late 50’s romantic ambience of Frankie Avalon’s 1959 recording of Venus with what I initially heard as a cool, lightly exotic, percussive, ‘island’ kind of style, until I noticed that the actual Real Style you used was “Americana Folk Pop’ – go figure!!!

I could easily imagine this song featured in any of the better-produced ‘beach’ movies of the 60’s, such as Where The Boys Are, or Blue Hawaii. It's that evocative of what is commonly described as a 'simpler time', whenever that was laugh.
.
Your singer has a strikingly cool, yet simultaneously warm and sensual (what a delicously complementary contradiction!!!) vocal quality and style that embraces the lyrics as though she were singing the words she wrote in a letter to the object of her desire. I’d love to hear her sing bossa nova classics such as The Girl From Ipanema, or Aruanda, composed by Carlos Lyra & Geraldo Vandré in 1965, or a new bossa nova song written by you, even smile.

‘Mystery Lady Singer’, it’s probably a good thing you choose to remain anonymous, ‘cause I believe that just about any of the regulars on the User’s Forum (including myself, of course), would be knocking on – no, banging on – no, digging a hole under -- your door , and begging you to book a studio recording date with them.

The melody is charming, the vocal Oo’s harmony is blue-sky beautiful, and the lyrics are sweet and innocently expressive of the romantic feelings they describe. They would fit as easily in a Valentine’s Day card as they do in your song, ‘Tunemonger’. I cannot wait to listen and re-listen to this song. I don’t think I could get tired of it.

Utterly refreshed by this song production,

LOREN (a.k.a. ‘bluage’)


Edited by bluage (03/30/20 12:32 AM)
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