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#617420 - 10/01/20 10:53 AM
[User Showcase]
The Silence
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Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 9498
Loc: Florida
Veteran
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 9498
Loc: Florida
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I broke a heart once. Here is the story. THE SILENCE it's a quarter past a late hour most the lights are gone along with those who have the sense but i'm still hanging on not far down the block i see in the night a bit of dawn from the second floor apartment of another hanger-on lonliness ain't quite so bad when you know you're not alone the silence helps you hurt a little more the light from the window's familiar but it didn't use to cry i hang my head to the things it says 'cause i'm the reason why there's a river of pain flowing by my door and half the tears are mine it's hard to see how i could be so foolish and so unkind but the fault must lie somewhere between so, she's half of who's to blame and the silence helps her hurt a little more it's a quarter past an early hour still the cries are heard pouring shadows down into the street sharp, accusing words sometimes i fear i might go back it's hard to stay away but i sit and watch the light stay on and try to keep out of its way loneliness is twice as hard 'cause i know that she's alone the silence helps me hurt a little more ©1977 floyd jane The BAND parts: EZKeys tracks MIDI SuperTracks in song: 2066:Piano, Rhythm NewAgeAnswers Ev16 110 MIDI SuperTracks in song: 2831:Piano, Rhythm GospelSlowBalladMike Ev 085 RealTracks in song: 1856:Cello, Background PopCountry Ev 085 RealTracks in song: 2338:Violin, Background, PopLow Ev 085 (1TrackStringSection) RealTracks in song: 2337:Violin, Background, PopHigh Ev 085 (1TrackStringSection) I created a strings track and a flute track using Spitfire BBC Orchestra Harmonies created in RealBand using Helicon plugin Me: lyrics, music, vocal, production, strings, flute, mix, master, art work Comments of any kind... Have at it. fj
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#617427 - 10/01/20 11:29 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 04/03/09
Posts: 7792
Veteran
Registered: 04/03/09
Posts: 7792
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Nice one.... kinda reminds me of Jackson Brown with the piano as the main instrument.
You done good on the production and choice of instruments.
_________________________
You can find my music at: www.herbhartley.com Add nothing that adds nothing to the music. As the sword chooses the warrior, so too, the song chooses the writer.
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#617442 - 10/01/20 02:20 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 12/06/03
Posts: 4353
Loc: Sydney Australia
Veteran
Registered: 12/06/03
Posts: 4353
Loc: Sydney Australia
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floyd
Lovely work on the backing, expertly arranged and produced. The piano sounded great and the strings were very genre specific.
Sad lyric matched by the evocative music and a vocal that is nicely emotive.
Wonderful songwriting.
Peter
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#617465 - 10/01/20 08:42 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 04/13/16
Posts: 3294
Loc: Cooran Queensland Australia
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Registered: 04/13/16
Posts: 3294
Loc: Cooran Queensland Australia
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A lovely song, yes a bit Jackson brown but a lot fj.
There're a few spots where the vocal & harmony are aggressive like on "the light..." usually the 1st couple of syllables of a phrase. That could be left as is or a tiny bit of level automation could temper it.
You did a fab job with a sparse arrangement and dynamic textures.
Excellent - as usual.
_________________________
Cheers rayc "What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe Pop on over to The Recording Rebels for positive, honest commentary, critiques and support. https://therecordingrebels.com
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#617471 - 10/02/20 01:43 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 11/30/07
Posts: 3931
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Veteran
Registered: 11/30/07
Posts: 3931
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Really good, floyd, as per usual  Those harmonies ... magnificent! I'll need to research Helicon. And the vocal overall sounds fabulous, nice and warm, just the right amount of presence. Piano sounds great too, are you running the MIDI SuperTrack through EZKeys? Also really like the cello and strings. Songwriting at it's best, loved it.
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#617476 - 10/02/20 02:38 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 04/07/13
Posts: 6463
Loc: South Carolina
Veteran
Registered: 04/07/13
Posts: 6463
Loc: South Carolina
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A 1977 write. Had me wonder how close to the original version what we hear in 2020 remains? A walk with no destination on a journey that never ends... Perfect setting for loneliness and silence. Enjoyed my listen.
_________________________
BIAB Ultra Pak+ 2021:RB 2021, Latest builds: Dell Optiplex 7040 Desktop; Windows-10-64 bit, Intel Core i7-6700 3.4GHz CPU and 16 GB Ram Memory.
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#617489 - 10/02/20 04:15 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
Expert
Registered: 12/29/10
Posts: 1520
Loc: Charlotte, NC
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I also noticed, right off the bat, that this is work that was done a long time ago, so I was immediately interested in hearing the “early” Floyd. I especially liked that your stanzas ended with an impersonal “you” , then “she”, and finally “me”..a kind of progressively-personalizing reflection. And you had some really nice intra-line rhymes..to me, these are like little verbal Velcro hooks that keep you listening closely. As others have said, the musical setting and performance are top-notch...the only thing I would have done differently is maybe a vocal repeat of that last phrase, but that’s just personal preference...excellent!
PS..I’ll add my vote to some feedback on how this might be different from your 1977 performance of same.
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#617490 - 10/02/20 04:16 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 01/03/14
Posts: 402
Journeyman
Registered: 01/03/14
Posts: 402
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Nothing not to like here as usual Floyd.
Lovely sound and poignant lyric.
Vic
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#617514 - 10/02/20 07:20 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 02/15/17
Posts: 3414
PG Music Staff
Registered: 02/15/17
Posts: 3414
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Very, very well done. I find it fascinating when users post old songs they wrote, re-imagined with Band-in-a-Box. You wrote this over 40 years ago and it still holds up - thanks for sharing
_________________________
Cheers,
Deryk
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#617515 - 10/02/20 07:23 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 12/13/13
Posts: 825
Expert
Registered: 12/13/13
Posts: 825
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I love this one, Floyd. It's genuine and emotional and your telling of it draws the listener in.
The vocal performance has to be one of your best. The blend of your voice and the piano is just right, especially in those critical first few seconds, and there's a spaciousness too that's pleasing and natural that fits the setting.
From the first lyric I was like, 'Wow! This is good!'
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#617536 - 10/02/20 08:54 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 01/06/20
Posts: 1166
Loc: Illinois
Expert
Registered: 01/06/20
Posts: 1166
Loc: Illinois
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Can't say enough.
Just excellent should do it!
Well told story.
Delivered with skill and emotion.
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#617541 - 10/02/20 09:39 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 06/09/16
Posts: 3128
Veteran
Registered: 06/09/16
Posts: 3128
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Floyd,
Beautiful and heartfelt songwriting. The story, internal as it is, has a nice arc with the subtle changes on the chorus last lines reminding there are real changing lives involved.
A fine simple arrangement and clear strong vocals; its all very, very good!
Robert
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#617572 - 10/02/20 04:14 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 1450
Loc: Virginia USA
Expert
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 1450
Loc: Virginia USA
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Such an emotionally-gripping, poignant song. This one goes on my list of top Floyd songs. Beautifully arranged and performed.
You broke a heart once? Just once?
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#617592 - 10/02/20 05:56 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 06/19/17
Posts: 2618
Loc: Victoria, BC
PG Music Staff
Registered: 06/19/17
Posts: 2618
Loc: Victoria, BC
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You're always such a good story teller! Thanks for taking the time to share this one with us.
_________________________
Cheers,
Ember
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#617608 - 10/02/20 11:33 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 12/29/12
Posts: 5532
Loc: Originally Missouri ... Now Al...
Veteran
Registered: 12/29/12
Posts: 5532
Loc: Originally Missouri ... Now Al...
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Floyd ...
I'll keep it simple, like your song.
Emotional.
A simplicity that says it all.
A bold truth.
Every single thing it needs and not the slight of what it doesn't.
Captivating, both musically and lyrically.
That pretty much says it all for me. Best to you and yours and please be safe.
Alan
Edited by Al-David (10/02/20 11:35 PM)
_________________________
BIAB 2018 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win10*8GB DDR4*I5-6th Gen*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120 Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops
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#617619 - 10/03/20 12:45 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 04/23/18
Posts: 1067
Loc: Mill Valley, California USA
Expert
Registered: 04/23/18
Posts: 1067
Loc: Mill Valley, California USA
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Floyd,
Really pretty, really poignant. Excellent production—just the right balance and touches. Would be really curious to hear more about how this song may have evolved from its original 1977 write given the passage of time. Great stuff!
All my best,
Deej
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#617671 - 10/03/20 08:56 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: PeterF]
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Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 9498
Loc: Florida
Veteran
Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 9498
Loc: Florida
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Nice one.... kinda reminds me of Jackson Brown with the piano as the main instrument.
You done good on the production and choice of instruments. Thanks, Herb. floyd
Lovely work on the backing, expertly arranged and produced. The piano sounded great and the strings were very genre specific.
Sad lyric matched by the evocative music and a vocal that is nicely emotive.
Wonderful songwriting.
Peter Thanks for the super comments, Peter...
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#617683 - 10/03/20 11:42 AM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 4327
Loc: Sacramento, California
Veteran
Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 4327
Loc: Sacramento, California
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Good write, as usual - even for a 40+ year old song.  The change of POV through the verses was notable. The sparse instrumentation worked for me - the additional instrumentation were subtle and didn't distract. The only nit was the harmonies - they were perhaps a bit too close rhythmically. These days, anything too perfect calls attention to itself as sounding unnatural.  I enjoyed the song, which is really the important bit.
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#617687 - 10/03/20 02:13 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 02/20/10
Posts: 1367
Loc: Maryland
Expert
Registered: 02/20/10
Posts: 1367
Loc: Maryland
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Great song that reminded me a bit of Dan Fogelberg's Same Old Lang Syne. I liked everything about this one, including the harmonies. Superb work as always.
_________________________
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
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#617701 - 10/03/20 04:02 PM
[User Showcase]
Re: The Silence
[Re: floyd jane]
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Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 1343
Loc: Denmark
Expert
Registered: 09/02/18
Posts: 1343
Loc: Denmark
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The way you can tell/sing a story is amazing. 1977-memories? It makes many of us curious of what really happened. Fantastic work, Floyd! Will
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