Log in to post
|
Print Thread |
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145 |
I posted this song about three years ago and took it down after six reviews. I was very self-conscious of my singing back then (still am) and I just felt the need to take it down. I also didn't explain the song at the time. When I wrote it, I started by trying to imagine the deaths of Jimmy from Lou Reed's Berlin and William Lee from Naked Lunch. Then it became a vampire's realization that he is inexplicably dying. He's talking to his bride as he fades. Anyway, I'm a big fan of Halloween, way more than Christmas, so here's a Halloween song. https://www.soundclick.com/music/songInfo.cfm?songID=14499366I wrote the song with six loops: three from BIAB, three from Big Fish. I sang. There are some proximity issues, I realize that and it's too late to fix it. Lyrics: And when the end is near All my movements cease Tell me that you still care My demise you'll ease When all the sanguine's gone From my withered veins Tell me that you'll be here Take the needed pains And don't try to follow me To the place I go I'll be among the worms Not a pretty show Just say that you love me Please say that you love me Tell me that you love me Just say it I've had a marvelous exit Time now to pay the cost You've been a boon companion No fret of loss Wish it would go much quicker I'm so averse to pain All of the reverie's left Such a filthy stain And if there's a world awaiting Some reward I don't deserve Keep a bit of love for me In good preserve Just tell me that you love me Please tell me that you love me Say that you love me Just say it
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jun 2016
Posts: 3,357
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Jun 2016
Posts: 3,357 |
Bob,
And don't try to follow me To the place I go I'll be among the worms Not a pretty show
Nicely ghoulish lyrics-you made me feel empathy with this rather scary creature! I found the mood and heavy guitar backing reminded me of Joy Division, so I think you followed through with the song`s intention. The other takeaway from this for me is hearing you sing in the upper register- I like the character of your voice there. A cool Halloween song.
Robert
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,406
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,406 |
Hi Bob cool song The intro is really great Very good background track Matching vocals to the theme Great work, Bob Many greetings Andi ;-)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,814
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,814 |
Clever use of dynamic contrast between the chorus and the next verse.... that's pretty cool to listen to. I like that.
The ending is a bit too sudden for my taste, I would probably add 4 or 8 more bars of power chords followed by the words "Just say it".
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2020
Posts: 1,572
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: May 2020
Posts: 1,572 |
Hi Tune Monger,
Nice intro. Your voice is very pleasant. The set is well done. I appreciated.
Kindly regard Derochette alias JaniJackFlash
Kindly regards Derochette alias JaniJackFlash
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 1,901
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 1,901 |
TuneMonger:
This is outstanding . . . really. Love the whole feel and sound of this. A David Bowie, 80's alt vibe. I love that lead guitar riff you have going on, and where you feature it in spots (e.g., at 1.44). Creative arrangement--like how you slow and silence the mix in all there right spots--and nice use of spoken word. Terrific write.
All my best,
Deej
And, BTW, your voice holds more than its own on this one. Nicely done!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 11,985
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 11,985 |
Bob,
Cool opening. MAN! Those drums are KILLER!
The "tell me that you love me" vocal is appropriately creepy! It works.
The vocal works perfectly for the subject matter. It would be nice if you could rid it of the boom-i-ness.
A very cool song AND a very cool performance. (worth "fixing" that boomy thing)
"And if there's a world awaiting Some reward I don't deserve Keep a bit of love for me In good preserve"
Wordsmith.
Like it.
fj
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 6,506
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 6,506 |
I'm an HUGE fan of BERLIN...to me Lou peaked with that album...the metal version of it as hinted at by RnR Animal would've been a treat too. Jimmy future...bleak & William's...bleaker still. Your voice is near perfect for this song. I think some of the phrasing might have been slightly different had you more confidence...just a few notes held before moving on etc. In the spoken chorus you remind me of Jimmy Nail's spoken parts in Ain't No Doubt in the very effect communication. ACE.
Cheers rayc "What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,169
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,169 |
TM...very dark and interesting...I also get a Bowie vibe from your vocal which was very well done! I really like the contrast between the verses and chorus...if I would change anything it would be the line in the last verse...given the background story you provided instead of "And if there's a world awaiting Some reward I don't deserve..." I would have written: "And if there's a world awaiting And punishment I deserve..." But that's just me and my feud with vampires I guess ...well written and performed...Dan
www.soundclick.com/firesongBiaB 2024, Steinberg Cubase Pro 13, Wavelab 11.2, SpetraLayers Pro 10, Audacity, Steinberg UR44 Interface, Yamaha Genos, Roland FP60 and FP10, Windows 10 You are who you are because you do what you do because of what you believe.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 8,056
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 8,056 |
Hey Tunemonger.
I really like this!
The vocals sound a tiny bit muffled against the backing track, but I think all you need to do is increase the mid-rage and decrease the bass in the vox to make them "sharper" and stand out just a bit more in the mix.
Very good song though!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,781
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,781 |
Hi Bob ...
Now, that's some creative writing and production! Those drums arte truly the heartbeat of the composition - excellent! Your vocal is quite good for the song. perhasps a slight more mid EQ would would really frame it in a superb light. As I said, the vocal is perfect for the song and that small EQ tweak might be worth considering.
All the backing tracks work - good choices and nicely mixed. That was a really cool-ghoul listen! A project well-done.
Alan
BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*16GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2014
Posts: 4,048
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2014
Posts: 4,048 |
Brrrrr... terribly good song ! Really suitable for Halloween. Good band. The changes are nice. Your voice really does it here! Anne-Marie
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,931
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,931 |
Wow, this is heavy stuff. Great intro creates an interesting mood and then the drums kick in with the power that surely awakens all dead ones. I really like your dark voice, well mixed too. Reminds me of Gary Numan's work. Excellent lyrics, like a story from a Wim Wenders movie, "And if there's a world awaiting/Some reward I don't deserve/Keep a bit of love for me/In good preserve". Powerful chord progression and I really love the sound of the lush band. I would have ended with a stronger held chord, cannot find anything else to fix. Your best no doubt and the best Halloween song on this forum ever (although I cannot recall another one ). Janne
Last edited by jannesan; 10/16/22 04:33 AM.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 5,318
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 5,318 |
TuneMonger,
I think you did a super job on this! Had me thinking Bowie immediately! I like the change at 1:45, it really gives such a complementary contrast to the other sections which have such a nice melody and chord structure!
Thanks, Torrey
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,316
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,316 |
Hi Bob,
Track sounds perfect, love that heavy vibe, and your vocal is absolutely perfect for this song!
Excellent song, one of your best I think. Well done!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 3,727
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 3,727 |
Man, I didn't know your range was that vast, Bob. What a clear falsetto. Your vocals are so much better in my ears. The mix is really good. There's so much entertainment within and everything compliments the whole so well. {Ok. I let the next song play and now I'm back and happily stuck in the wonderful harmonica tunes in your channel. Wait. I'll be back} A sad death or whatever a vampire does at the end. Man, you are so good with words. Excellent lyrics as always. Yes, Torrey already mentioned Bowie, and I'm with him. [Ok. That's it. I'll be listening to harmonica now.]
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,703
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,703 |
Super intro Bob. I agree with Floyd. The drums really set the mood for the song. Super vocal and instrumentation. Well done...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145 |
Hey Robert,
Thanks for quoting the lyrics, and for the singing compliment. I need all the support I can get in that area.
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145 |
Thanks for the good review, Andi!
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145 |
> The ending is a bit too sudden for my taste, I would probably add 4 or 8 more bars of power chords followed by the words "Just say it".
Thanks, BD, I don't know what made me end the song that way, I definitely should've brought the power chords back in. Good feedback!
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
New! XPro Styles PAK 7 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Mac!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 7 with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 50 RealTracks and RealDrums that are sure to delight!
With XPro Styles PAK 7 you can expect 25 rock & pop, 25 jazz, and 25 country styles, as well as 25 of this year's wildcard genre: Celtic!
Here's a small sampling of what XPro Styles PAK 7 has to offer: energetic rock jigs, New Orleans funk, lilting jazz waltzes, fast Celtic punk, uptempo train beats, gritty grunge, intense jazz rock, groovy EDM, soulful R&B, soft singer-songwriter pop, country blues rock, and many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 7 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Supercharge your Band-in-a-Box 2024® with XPro Styles PAK 7! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Watch the XPro Styles PAK 7 Overview & Styles Demos video.
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2024 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
New! Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Mac!
Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box version 2024 is here with 200 brand new styles to take for a spin!
Along with 50 new styles each for the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, we’ve put together a collection of styles using sounds from the SynthMaster plugin!
In this PAK you'll find: dubby reggae grooves, rootsy Americana, LA jazz pop, driving pop rock, mellow electronica, modern jazz fusion, spacey country ballads, Motown shuffles, energetic EDM, and plenty of synth heavy grooves! Xtra Style PAK 18 features these styles and many, many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 18 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Expand your Band-in-a-Box 2024® library with Xtra Styles PAK 18! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 18 here.
Watch the Xtra Styles PAK 18 Overview & Styles Demos video.
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 18 requires the 2024 UltraPAK/UltraPAK+/Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
New! Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Windows!
Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box version 2024 is here with 200 brand new styles to take for a spin!
Along with 50 new styles each for the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, we’ve put together a collection of styles using sounds from the SynthMaster plugin!
In this PAK you'll find: dubby reggae grooves, rootsy Americana, LA jazz pop, driving pop rock, mellow electronica, modern jazz fusion, spacey country ballads, Motown shuffles, energetic EDM, and plenty of synth heavy grooves! Xtra Style PAK 18 features these styles and many, many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 18 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Expand your Band-in-a-Box 2024® library with Xtra Styles PAK 18! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 18 here.
Watch the Xtra Styles PAK 18 Overview & Styles Demos video.
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 18 requires the 2024 UltraPAK/UltraPAK+/Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
New! XPro Styles PAK 7 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Windows!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 7 with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 50 RealTracks and RealDrums that are sure to delight!
With XPro Styles PAK 7 you can expect 25 rock & pop, 25 jazz, and 25 country styles, as well as 25 of this year's wildcard genre: Celtic!
Here's a small sampling of what XPro Styles PAK 7 has to offer: energetic rock jigs, New Orleans funk, lilting jazz waltzes, fast Celtic punk, uptempo train beats, gritty grunge, intense jazz rock, groovy EDM, soulful R&B, soft singer-songwriter pop, country blues rock, and many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 7 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Supercharge your Band-in-a-Box 2024® with XPro Styles PAK 7! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Watch the XPro Styles PAK 7 Overview & Styles Demos video.
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2024 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
Video - Band-in-a-Box® DAW Plugin Version 6 for Mac®: New Features for Reaper
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Mac® - Update Today!
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Mac® Video - Over 50 New Features and Enhancements!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Forums65
Topics82,895
Posts750,783
Members38,936
|
Most Online2,537 Jan 19th, 2020
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|