Log in to post
|
Print Thread |
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877 |
The Country That Doesn't Want You The title for this song was inspired from a part in the novel American Dirt by Jeanine Cummins. For the "C" part of the song, I borrowed directly from "The New Colossus" by Emma Lazarus: the poem inscribed on the plaque on the pedestal of the Statue of Liberty. I know I have to work on my diction: In the chorus, "want you" comes out "wanchoo." Gesundheit! Merry Christmas, my forum friends! The Wrecking Crew: RT697 Guitar, Electric, Rhythm ElecRockDirty RT4133 Guitar, Electric, Rhythm ProgRockLondonSyncPower NI Electric Mint Various Guitar Loops NI Prime Bass DOD Drum Loops Lyrics You left your family You left your home Danger in the desert Traveling all alone Looking for liberty And a dream to come true You want to go To the country that doesn’t want you Poverty, brutality Famine, and disorder They had the same reasons But came from a different border Looking for liberty And a dream to come true You want to go To the country that doesn’t want you Give me your tired Give me your homeless and poor Where’s the lamp by the golden door Looking for liberty And a dream to come true You want to go To the country that doesn’t want you. Your huddled masses Yearning to breathe free The wretched refuse Of your teeming shores Words aren’t true anymore
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 21,495
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 21,495 |
Super groove
I found nothing wrong with your vocal
Great mix
But it isn't that the country doesn't want you. The country wants you to enter it legally.
My wife and I decided to never go to bed angry. We've been awake since last Tuesday!
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 6,462
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 6,462 |
Excellent narrative, Excellent analysis too. My country has reneged on its Refugee Rights agreements time & again over the last decade. We don't have a plaque proclaiming an undeniable truth whilst doing the opposite we just do the wrong thing. Australia, like the U.S.A., appears as a beacon of promise to those fleeing poverty, war and corruption. Pity we aren't the light on the hill any more. Musically this is strong from the backing to the melody...love the rattly bass in the C. Your voice is good for this though you've probably pushed to hard to sound earnest in the 1st verse. I suspect a warmer, move understanding voice at that point would be perfect. This is the time of year when the narratives combine well... it's unlikely that the coincidence will spark in many.
Cheers rayc "What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,145 |
Great groove, would've liked to have heard the chorus "pop" more if there were some way to do that. Good singing, I've always enjoyed your voice. Good lyrics. Happy holidaze!
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,280
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,280 |
I agree with Ray:
Excellent narrative, Excellent analysis too
Really well written, and I like the use of the quote from the plaque on the Statue of Liberty. Lou Reed did something similar in a song at some point if memory serves.
Really well done, Scott, great groove and vocal.
Best to you and yours for the holiday!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,762
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,762 |
Great song with a great groove, it's different in a very positive way, I like it a lot. This was a running gag when Roger Hodgson was interviewed by my local radio station: - Hello, my name is Roger Hodgson...- Gesundheit!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jan 2020
Posts: 2,933
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Jan 2020
Posts: 2,933 |
love the voc style similar to the one on your what i consider to be a fantastic uber hit song...To be with you.
merry xmas.
om
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,395
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,395 |
Hi Scott Cool song Has a great background track And the vocals work great with the sound of the song I really like it Thanks for sharing Have a nice Christmas and a healthy new year too Many greetings Andi ;-)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877 |
Super groove
I found nothing wrong with your vocal
Great mix
But it isn't that the country doesn't want you. The country wants you to enter it legally. Thanks, Mario! Excellent narrative, Excellent analysis too. My country has reneged on its Refugee Rights agreements time & again over the last decade. We don't have a plaque proclaiming an undeniable truth whilst doing the opposite we just do the wrong thing. Australia, like the U.S.A., appears as a beacon of promise to those fleeing poverty, war and corruption. Pity we aren't the light on the hill any more. Musically this is strong from the backing to the melody...love the rattly bass in the C. Your voice is good for this though you've probably pushed to hard to sound earnest in the 1st verse. I suspect a warmer, move understanding voice at that point would be perfect. This is the time of year when the narratives combine well... it's unlikely that the coincidence will spark in many.
Thanks so much, Ray, for the feedback. I a bit lazy and a bit impatient when recording. I do five vocal takes (unless it's unbearably bad). Then I take the least of the worst takes for each line, so for the first verse I just took the better sounding take. I might revisit the vocal when I am less lazy and more patient. Great groove, would've liked to have heard the chorus "pop" more if there were some way to do that. Good singing, I've always enjoyed your voice. Good lyrics. Happy holidaze! Thanks for the listen and the positive comments about the vocal.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,647
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,647 |
Hi Ezekiel,
Good song with catchy beat and good lyrics.
Unbelievably - I'm also currently working on a song about the Statue of Liberty.
Best Regards & Merry Xmas Nigel
Nigel Spiers Christchurch, New Zealand info@nzacoustics.com
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 3,642
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 3,642 |
Love the feel, and that guitar you pushed to the right really supports it well. Good mix. Your diction is fine. Seems most folks I know say wanchoo. It's all about communication, and you tell this story with compassion and sing it with passion. Many words turn into platitudes that no longer have meaning, but there is truth in what you say. Happy Christmas, Scott.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 8,003
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 8,003 |
Scott, This is a rockin' tune. Rockin' for sure. Man, I think you should take this song down to a border town in Texas to a little bar with a lot of Dodge Rams and Harleys out front. Get up on stage and start singing this as loud as you can and add: MAGA hat wearing rednecks! Gonna drive your truck in a big ditch stinkin' dirty redneck hater Stevie Ray Vaughn was sissy! Make sure you are behind a wall of titanium chicken wire and let me know how it goes. Don't forget to say Merry Christmas!!! ![smile smile](/forums/images/graemlins/default/smile.gif)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 11,914
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 11,914 |
Ez,
Killer tracks! Radio Pop Punk. Excellent production/arrangement.
Excellent write. Intelligent.
Your vocal is perfect for this.
Very Well Mixed.
Top shelf.
fj
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 4,219
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 4,219 |
Zeke, great song with an equally important theme. This topical subject is becoming more of a worldwide crisis with no easy answers, so it is important to keep pushing it forward so that maybe someday the humanitarians and the protectionists can compromise and find something that works for everyone. It won’t be easy. I wrote something about this from a different angle sometime ago and may revisit it. This was a great listen. Good work, Tom
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 1,879
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 1,879 |
Yes it is a great arrangement and mix.
Vic
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877 |
I agree with Ray:
Excellent narrative, Excellent analysis too
Really well written, and I like the use of the quote from the plaque on the Statue of Liberty. Lou Reed did something similar in a song at some point if memory serves.
Really well done, Scott, great groove and vocal.
Best to you and yours for the holiday!
Thanks, Dave. Happy Holidays to you! (Think of the closing melody line of the song when you read that.) Great song with a great groove, it's different in a very positive way, I like it a lot. This was a running gag when Roger Hodgson was interviewed by my local radio station: - Hello, my name is Roger Hodgson...- Gesundheit! Thanks for the listen and comment, BD. love the voc style similar to the one on your what i consider to be a fantastic uber hit song...To be with you.
merry xmas.
om Merry Christmas, OM! Hi Scott Cool song Has a great background track And the vocals work great with the sound of the song I really like it Thanks for sharing Have a nice Christmas and a healthy new year too Many greetings Andi ;-) Thanks, Andi. Frohe Weihnachten.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877 |
Hi Ezekiel,
Good song with catchy beat and good lyrics.
Unbelievably - I'm also currently working on a song about the Statue of Liberty.
Best Regards & Merry Xmas Nigel Nigel, I'm looking forward to hearing your S of L song. Love the feel, and that guitar you pushed to the right really supports it well. Good mix. Your diction is fine. Seems most folks I know say wanchoo. It's all about communication, and you tell this story with compassion and sing it with passion. Many words turn into platitudes that no longer have meaning, but there is truth in what you say. Happy Christmas, Scott. Thanks much, Marty!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 6,921
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 6,921 |
Nicely done! As for "wanchoo", a song in this style would probably be more harmed than helped by applying "proper" diction. ![wink wink](/forums/images/graemlins/default/wink.gif) The lyric reminds me of when the acting head of US Citizenship and Immigration Services suggested rewriting "The New Colossus". ![crazy crazy](/forums/images/graemlins/default/crazy.gif)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,892
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,892 |
Strong message of the contradiction between liberty and reality, interesting inspiration, the backstory explains the lamp and the last line clearly. What a sound, the drums have nice 'pop' sound and those riffing guitars work very well. The "C" parts are harder, but really cool, reminding me of 80's Brit new wave, New Model Army. Enjoyed your vocals, fits the message and the band.
Janne
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 2,877 |
Ez,
Killer tracks! Radio Pop Punk. Excellent production/arrangement.
Excellent write. Intelligent.
Your vocal is perfect for this.
Very Well Mixed.
Top shelf.
fj Thank you for the kind assessment, Floyd. Zeke, great song with an equally important theme. This topical subject is becoming more of a worldwide crisis with no easy answers, so it is important to keep pushing it forward so that maybe someday the humanitarians and the protectionists can compromise and find something that works for everyone. It won’t be easy. I wrote something about this from a different angle sometime ago and may revisit it. This was a great listen. Good work, Tom Thanks, Tom! Yes it is a great arrangement and mix.
Vic Thank for the feedback, Vic.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
New! XPro Styles PAK 7 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Mac!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 7 with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 50 RealTracks and RealDrums that are sure to delight!
With XPro Styles PAK 7 you can expect 25 rock & pop, 25 jazz, and 25 country styles, as well as 25 of this year's wildcard genre: Celtic!
Here's a small sampling of what XPro Styles PAK 7 has to offer: energetic rock jigs, New Orleans funk, lilting jazz waltzes, fast Celtic punk, uptempo train beats, gritty grunge, intense jazz rock, groovy EDM, soulful R&B, soft singer-songwriter pop, country blues rock, and many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 7 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Supercharge your Band-in-a-Box 2024® with XPro Styles PAK 7! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Watch the XPro Styles PAK 7 Overview & Styles Demos video.
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2024 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
New! Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Mac!
Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box version 2024 is here with 200 brand new styles to take for a spin!
Along with 50 new styles each for the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, we’ve put together a collection of styles using sounds from the SynthMaster plugin!
In this PAK you'll find: dubby reggae grooves, rootsy Americana, LA jazz pop, driving pop rock, mellow electronica, modern jazz fusion, spacey country ballads, Motown shuffles, energetic EDM, and plenty of synth heavy grooves! Xtra Style PAK 18 features these styles and many, many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 18 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Expand your Band-in-a-Box 2024® library with Xtra Styles PAK 18! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 18 here.
Watch the Xtra Styles PAK 18 Overview & Styles Demos video.
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 18 requires the 2024 UltraPAK/UltraPAK+/Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
New! Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Windows!
Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box version 2024 is here with 200 brand new styles to take for a spin!
Along with 50 new styles each for the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, we’ve put together a collection of styles using sounds from the SynthMaster plugin!
In this PAK you'll find: dubby reggae grooves, rootsy Americana, LA jazz pop, driving pop rock, mellow electronica, modern jazz fusion, spacey country ballads, Motown shuffles, energetic EDM, and plenty of synth heavy grooves! Xtra Style PAK 18 features these styles and many, many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 18 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Expand your Band-in-a-Box 2024® library with Xtra Styles PAK 18! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 18 here.
Watch the Xtra Styles PAK 18 Overview & Styles Demos video.
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 18 requires the 2024 UltraPAK/UltraPAK+/Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
New! XPro Styles PAK 7 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Windows!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 7 with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 50 RealTracks and RealDrums that are sure to delight!
With XPro Styles PAK 7 you can expect 25 rock & pop, 25 jazz, and 25 country styles, as well as 25 of this year's wildcard genre: Celtic!
Here's a small sampling of what XPro Styles PAK 7 has to offer: energetic rock jigs, New Orleans funk, lilting jazz waltzes, fast Celtic punk, uptempo train beats, gritty grunge, intense jazz rock, groovy EDM, soulful R&B, soft singer-songwriter pop, country blues rock, and many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 7 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Supercharge your Band-in-a-Box 2024® with XPro Styles PAK 7! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Watch the XPro Styles PAK 7 Overview & Styles Demos video.
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2024 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
Video - Band-in-a-Box® DAW Plugin Version 6 for Mac®: New Features for Reaper
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Mac® - Update Today!
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 for Mac® Video - Over 50 New Features and Enhancements!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Forums65
Topics82,638
Posts747,477
Members38,836
|
Most Online2,537 Jan 19th, 2020
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|