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#887953 06/01/26 10:38 AM
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A song about orphans, not those who have no parents, but those who haven't received love or attention from their parents.

Style : _STUMBLE.STY (Americana Soul Groove)

RealTracks dans ce style Style: 2260:Basse, Electrique, Funky Groove 60s Bin 100
RealTracks dans ce style Style: 1690:Piano, Acoustique, Rythmee PopPromise DblCrch Bin 100
RealTracks dans ce style Style: 2904:Guitare, Electrique, Rythme Graveleux Bluesy Pop Bin 100
RealTracks dans ce style Style: 2930:Guitare, Acoustique, Rythme Folk Rock 8ths Bin 100
RealTracks dans ce morceau song: ~674:Orgue, B3, Arrière plan Blues Roadhouse Bin 120
RealTracks dans ce morceau song: ~1438:Piano, Electrique, Soliste Jazz Funk Groovin DblCrch Bin 110
RealDrums [dans ce Style:Soul60sEv^6-a:Snare, Bass Drum, HiHat , b:Snare, Bass Drum, Ride
Vocals and additional guitars: Suno
Mixed in Cubase
Thanks for the feedback
Laurent

laurent4114 #887967 06/01/26 01:18 PM
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laurent, such a super upbeat song with such sad but true lyrics.
I just can't picture anyone not loving their kids
Super vocal.
Great groove
IMHO this is your best to date
Loved it


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laurent4114 #887970 06/01/26 01:29 PM
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Laurent,

Great song and video. Tough lyrical content, but conveyed so well. Excellent arrangement and mix.

Awesome job!

Bob

laurent4114 #887981 06/01/26 04:49 PM
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A great track with well-chosen and finely balanced instruments. Exceptional mix. Very easy on the ear – a track that could suit any number of different lyrical themes, happy, sad, wistful, hopeful, or poignant (like the one you chose here). Well done.


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laurent4114 #887999 06/02/26 02:52 AM
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Laurent, super composition. LOVE the harmonic movement and dynamic arrangement. You've put together a great band and led it with taste and skill. Suno is accenting the wrong syllable on a few words (like "pa-RENTS" and "per-SON") which may be a conscious musical choice (I get it!) or something you wish to address. Lovely song.


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laurent4114 #888007 06/02/26 09:42 AM
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To judge only the music, and not be influenced by the video, the first time listening I did not watch. Based on that, I think is a really excellent track. Very well sculpted arrangement and mix; great vocal; and really really awesome melody. Was that your melody line, or Suno's? Thanks for sharing, a really nice listen


laurent4114 #888012 06/02/26 10:30 AM
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Laurent,

Tough subject well covered
Exceptional production
Gorgeous sound
Excellent mix

Good music

.fj

laurent4114 #888018 06/02/26 01:40 PM
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Great song, I'd like to read the (tough) lyrics. good video,. Yes, perhaps one of your best!


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laurent4114 #888040 06/02/26 03:25 PM
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Hi Laurent!
The video effects are so good, they distract from the EXCELLENT music. I’ve just gone back to listen without watching - very professional sound and distinctive melody and chord progression. I’m impressed by your style choice also, so I’m going to listen to _STUMBLE in BIAB. The instrumentation and their parts played create a lot of variation in texture - I particularly like the acoustic guitars leading into the solo, and the muted guitars in the outro.

I agree with Ron about the emphasis of some syllables. This can be a problem for me also, when I write the melody first and the melody doesn’t fit my lyrics, so I either change the lyric or change the melody. In case of the latter, I will try putting the higher melody note on the syllable with emphasis, and the less emphasised having the lower note I.e. swap the melody notes while maintaining harmonic integrity.

Anyhow, your song is excellent and very interesting and great harmonic progression to listen to.
Andrew

Last edited by Andrew Dee; 06/02/26 03:32 PM. Reason: Instrumentation comments
laurent4114 #888045 06/02/26 08:55 PM
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Hi Laurent

Tough subject matter, handled really well. The video is exceptional, a really high quality production. I loved the opening guitar in the intro, it really grabbed my ears and captured my attention. The verses, what is that chord progression??? it made for an awkward listen initially, I wasn't sure whether I liked it or not. It certainly lends to the awkwardness of the subject, and takes the listener on a bit of a journey.

Really enjoyed it Laurent, good work, kind regards

laurent4114 #888068 06/03/26 07:24 AM
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What a wonderful idea for a song, Laurent. And what a great song to tell it. The video is really quite amazing as well. A sad song, but with the sound of hope. Excellewnt production. Emotionall done so well.


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MarioD #888076 06/03/26 08:04 AM
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Originally Posted by MarioD
laurent, such a super upbeat song with such sad but true lyrics.
I just can't picture anyone not loving their kids
Super vocal.
Great groove
IMHO this is your best to date
Loved it
Thank you very much, Mario.
Laurent

rsdean #888077 06/03/26 08:06 AM
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Originally Posted by rsdean
Laurent,

Great song and video. Tough lyrical content, but conveyed so well. Excellent arrangement and mix.

Awesome job!

Bob
Thanks Bob for your comments.
Laurent

laurent4114 #888082 06/03/26 12:13 PM
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This is really a great and unique idea for a song, Laurent.
Nice and good mix.
Enjoyed my listen [Linked Image - Only viewable when logged in]

Ghostgum #888155 06/04/26 07:59 AM
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Originally Posted by Ghostgum
A great track with well-chosen and finely balanced instruments. Exceptional mix. Very easy on the ear – a track that could suit any number of different lyrical themes, happy, sad, wistful, hopeful, or poignant (like the one you chose here). Well done.
Thank you very much for the comments Ghostgum.
Laurent.

DC Ron #888156 06/04/26 08:01 AM
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Originally Posted by DC Ron
Laurent, super composition. LOVE the harmonic movement and dynamic arrangement. You've put together a great band and led it with taste and skill. Suno is accenting the wrong syllable on a few words (like "pa-RENTS" and "per-SON") which may be a conscious musical choice (I get it!) or something you wish to address. Lovely song.
Thank you for the comments DC Ron
Laurent.

laurent4114 #888249 06/05/26 03:30 AM
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Very touching song, Laurent, and done very well indeed.

Love the change at 2:58! Just super playing, very tasteful. I wonder if you could bring that in earlier, maybe halfway through, and then return to the main theme?

Good stuff, enjoyed.

lingyai #888397 06/07/26 10:02 AM
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Originally Posted by lingyai
To judge only the music, and not be influenced by the video, the first time listening I did not watch. Based on that, I think is a really excellent track. Very well sculpted arrangement and mix; great vocal; and really really awesome melody. Was that your melody line, or Suno's? Thanks for sharing, a really nice listen
Thanks for the comments. I created the chord chart, melody, and lyrics in BIAB. I'll use Suno later.
Laurent

floyd jane #888398 06/07/26 10:03 AM
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Originally Posted by floyd jane
Laurent,

Tough subject well covered
Exceptional production
Gorgeous sound
Excellent mix

Good music

.fj
Thank you very much Floyd for the comments.
Laurent

laurent4114 #888562 06/09/26 01:22 PM
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Hi, Laurent.

Excellent production, good write.

I agree with others that the emphasis in some words "fell in the wrong spot", so to speak.

But that's the risk you take when writing in a different language, I guess.

Well done!


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