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Hi, all: Here's a second collaboration with Carroll Kiphen, who wrote the lyrics that jump-started this little rocker. I hope it's worth the listen. Feedback is, as always, both appreciated and usually needed.  Thanks in advance to all of you. Stay healthy and safe. Deej Here's the song:GIRL WITH DARK SUNGLASSES Here are the lyrics:When she removes her shades I can see the fear in her blue eyes. She’s so afraid for the world to see she’s a frightened girl inside. She looks cool and calm and in control— little does anyone know that behind those shades, she’s so afraid her desperation shows. The girl with dark sun glasses looks like a movie star. The girl with the dark sunglasses— no one knows who you are. At night behind closed doors she wages a war she cannot win. She struggles in vain, and it’s such a shame— She won’t let love back in. She looks cool and calm and in control— little does anyone know that behind those shades, she’s so afraid Her desperation shows. The girl with dark sun glasses looks like a movie star. The girl with the dark sunglasses— no one knows who you are. And her beauty’s betrayed her; her fame has caged her; she’s walked her time upon the stage. Yes, her beauty’s betrayed her; fame has aged her— She hides behind dark shades. She looks cool and calm and in control— little does anyone know that behind those shades, she’s so afraid Her desperation shows. The girl with dark sun glasses looks like a movie star. The girl with the dark sunglasses— no one knows who you are. And here is the band:
RealTracks: 1025:Guitar, Electric, Strumming CleanOpen Ev 120 RealTracks: 2643:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm ModernPopHardHighMurray Ev16 075 RealTracks: 2644:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm ModernPopHardMurray Ev16 075 RealTracks: 2586:Guitar, Electric, Soloist PunkMurray Ev 165 RealTracks: 2591:Bass, Electric, RockPicked8ths Ev 165 RealTracks: 1276:Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm PopUpliftPulsing Ev16 120 RealTracks: 686 Organ, B3, Background Pop RealDrums: RockHardModernEv8^1-a:Snare, HiHat , b:4 beat Snare, HiHat
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Great rocker, great hook, great singing. The bridge really intrigued me, I think many of us tend to phone in the bridge, (I know I do) but this bridge was interesting musically. A great one here!
Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
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Cool Deej.
Vocally the verses seem louder than the 1st chorus at least.
there's quite a bit of sibilant noise in there - could be the reverb accentuating it.
The bridge melody is cool.
This works well as a rocker but I can hear a country rock song in there via your cadences and other bits of melody - as well as the cautionary tale aspects.
Top stuff.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Hey Deej, that is a very cool song you made here!
Good lyrics and very well sung (however, that's allways the case with you and your songs)!
But I have to admit Ray has some good point about the volume and sibilance.
Despite that, it is a lovely song to listen to.
Hans
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Yeah, I like this.
Good writing, strong, memorable chorus, and a great bridge! And of course I'm a fan of your vocals, always.
Good song, enjoyed.
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Great lyrics to jump start this rocker. Well done both of you. Very creative Bridge, Deej, and the harmony in the chorus puts this right on the top shelf. Man, there's a lot of instruments crying for attention. Very enjoyable song!!
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hi deej56 really great tune very enjoyable sounds great on my system thanks Eric
AMD (TM) 5950 4.9 GHz 16Core Processor 64 bit 32 bits of ram windows 10 pro 64 bit os. sound card Antelope ZenQ guitars Ibanez 2202a 1968 les Paul Custom and Cavin ae 185 Guitar boss Gt-100,GT1000 pedal Yamaha HS8 studio monitors
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This has such a cool sound! A little like I fought the law and the law won rhythm thing going on.
Excellent vocals and lyrics.
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Beautiful work Deej! Your vocals on this really shine! This chorus on this is really catchy but the bridge makes the song for me with the shift to minor lead in chords! Definitely my favorite of yours! Thanks, Torrey
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Deej @ Carroll, Really cool soft punk(?) tune! Solid stuff in all respects. Choruses are outstanding! Liked it a lot. Vocals are excellent, and I do wish they were a little more on the top of the mix Powerful collaboration, congrats to both of you! Misha.
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DeeJ & Carroll ...
A really cool tune and so well put together! Love the diversion to the minor chord in the bridge ...that's a very nice touch! Super lyric by Carroll and arrangement by you. And, DeeJ, i think you've found the perfect landing spot for your vocal EQ ... this really hits the mark for my ears. Kudos to both of you! Wishing you both the best and be safe ...
Alan
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Deej,
Your use of BIAB and your production skills have shown growth with each new release. And you've really hit your stride here.
The opening is excellent. Nice Bass start (few folks ever think to do that), then adding the drums (they sound good) and then a single, snappy rhythm guitar... all leading to a rhythmic vocal - Pure Pop. I'm hooked. The addition of organ at just the right time. Shades of Joe Jackson - does not get better than that...
All of your vocal work (in previous releases) has been good, but this performance is, by far, your absolute best. Well recorded, processed and tucked-in-the-mix perfectly. Pro level stuff...
A terrific Pop melody throughout. As others have mentioned, the bridge works really well. The way you handled the opening line of the chorus coming out of that was extraordinary.
The lyrics works well. But the real star here is the overall sound - Production, Vocal, Mix. Excellent.
fj
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Dang man! There are so many bands I could say this write "sort of reminds me" of; but it's all it's own. For some reason, at times, I get a very cheap trick vibe. If you knew how much I REALLY like Cheap Trick, you would understand the weight of that comment. The MULTIPLE hook you have in this song are AWESOME! SOOOO catchy! The arrangement/feel changes fit so perfectly in supporting them as well. Mark me impressed. I'm really diggin' this song! Great job! (Sorry I didn't comment on production. I'm more of a writer producer than an engineer. I'm not sure I'm even qualified to stand in a room with engineers. Possibly not even in the parking lot outside of the studio. Anyway, I commented on what I know a bit more about.)
Chad (Hope that makes it easier)
TEMPO TANTRUM: What a lead singer has when they can't stay in time.
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We immediately thought of Tom Petty or his involvement with Mudcrutch. Good things in our book Gotta mention also that you make outstanding use of solo RT's as they always seem to have been played just for your production. Your lead vocal and harmony were as Gregg Allman says "hittin' the note" and very much driving this excellent rocker. You got handed a good lyric too! Enjoyed it. J&B
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Deej,
An excellent write with all the verses leading to that great chorus hook.
One of the catchiest power pop songs I`ve heard on this forum and your vocal rides the energy of the song so well.
Excellent choices on the RT`s ( love the punk lead guitar).
I do think there`s that bit of harshness on de-essing to tame, but this is a keeper... and that bridge progression is really cool!
Robert
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Great retro feel!! Very catchy, exciting song! Very good vocal, as always! I didn't realize you're in Marin County.....we're practically neighbors! Really great job on this tune!! Take care. Greg
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This is an excellent tune. Very cool vocal, lyric and backtrack. Guitar was excellent. I really like the mix on this tune. Very well balanced..
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Great rockin feel to this, catchy chorus, vocals well suited and solid through out you do the track justice with them.
It was upbeat and lively , yea I liked this !.
Thanks
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Great way to start with only the bass, introduces nicely to the punk approach. Reminds me of The Ramones, especially the catchy chorus. The bridge is very intriguing, adds nice color to otherwise musically upbeat mood. Lyrics are bit dark like the sunglasses, but you have kept the message crystal clear and enough simple for a sing-a-long. Your voice suits punk very well also. Thumbs up from me for the melodic pop punk.
Janne
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Deej
Superb, a great production, write and performance.
Just a really great (catchy) listen all round.
Peter
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