|
Log in to post
|
Print Thread |
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 2,060
Veteran
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 2,060 |
Hi, all: Here’s almost something new . . . and by almost, I mean that I’m not quite sure if I’m done with it . . . and by that, I mean there are other things that I’m thinking of doing with it but not sure if I should . . . which is also to say, that I’m not sure it’s even a song worth spending more time on--my answer to which changes from moment to moment. So, I figure, why not put out what I have so far for some input to help me decide? It’s about the only thing new I’ve got going, for better or worse. Thanks in advance for the listens and feedback. My best to you all, Deej Here’s the song:NEVERMORE Here are the lyrics:Hey, girl, there’s a raven at your door Speaking truths that you’ve well heard before A cheater’s proof in hand Your man doesn’t love you anymore And it’s high time you know it And the answer to the question you Have asked a million times Is the same one you’ve tried so hard to ignore There’s a message in this raven’s wings Now scream it to the skies Nevermore Hey, girl, it’s a shout out from the dark A true confession of a tell tale heart You’ve been left guessing, but now you know So blow it all apart You’ve got the strength Don’t be shy to show it Walk away, but it’s okay if you need to cry I’ll be here, ever near You can take this feathered hand And we can fly (Never more waiting in the dark Evermore in this raven’s heart) And here’s the band:RealTracks 1826: Bass, Electric, PopModernGrooveSync4s RealTracks 3182: Guitar, Acoustic, Rhythm GrungeUnpluggedQuinn RealTracks 1830: Guitar, Electric, Rhythm PopModernGrooveBrightDist RealTracks 3520: Guitar, Electric, Rhythm Americana16thsDelayBrent RealTracks 1262: Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm PopShiningHeld RealDrums: RockNorthern^7
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 8,633
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 8,633 |
HI Deej ...
I always look forward to a new one from you.
I enjoyed this from start to finish. I like the idea of using a raven as the messenger - unique and interesting in a most favorable way.
Nice chord pattern, too - especially in the chorus. There's just something about the I - 1V7 chord combination that piques my ears' interest. Good lyric, vocal, and arrangement. I enjoyed my listen very much. Spot-on mix, too.
This couplet is, in my opinion, the best in the lyric:
Hey, girl, it’s a shout out from the dark
A true confession of a tell tale heart
Take care ...
Alan
BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*32GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,547
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,547 |
I'm on my cell phone, so I may be more succinct than usual. Where's the problem?  Listened to it only once, but enjoyed every second of it. The form is excellent, you vary things in between repetitions of the chorus and the verses in between, and that more than keeps the listener's interest. The writing is very, very good. If I am to be INCREDIBLY picky, make sure you land that falsetto note on the word "okay" It's so high! But, look, this is an excellent, really excellent song. I would put it amongst your top ones. I wouldn't change a thing, me, but (as you yourself told me many times) don't second guess your own artistic instinct. I, myself, really loved it ... and its message is original, if only because of the way it's presented in. Maybe I am easy to please, but I can't see a problem, here.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 8,564
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 8,564 |
Deej,
This is superb! Your vocal is stellar and the production is excellent. Love the song and the arrangement. Great track selection.
This was definitely worth putting out.
Bob
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 851
Expert
|
|
Expert
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 851 |
Interesting and thoughtful lyric
Cool Melody that took you to the catchy chorus.
Good mix and production and your voice sounds perfect for this tune
Nice jobNice job
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 12,727
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 12,727 |
Deej,
A solid track. That BAND holds together well.
Vocals are excellent - as always. Well recorded. (Stellar falsetto in the bridge!)
A "clever" write. A bit esoteric for my tastes, though. Still...well done.
A VERY catchy chorus.
You are a talent.
fj
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 2,733
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 2,733 |
I can't find anything I would change, so my advice is: leave it as it is Love the lyrics and its delivery, the production and especially the chorus. Very catchy!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,527
Expert
|
|
Expert
Joined: Oct 2021
Posts: 1,527 |
Hi DJ
WOW - Really good song from the beginning to the end
Excellent vocal work
You can't get the chorus out of your head ;-)))
1A work DJ
Many greetings
Andi ;-)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 7,170
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 7,170 |
Deej,
it's excellent as it is. The lighter arrangement contrasting with the dark associations with the lyric.
ACE melody and progressions.
Superb vocal performance.
I don't know - you could try it in the BIAB Doom style for fun.
I'm sure it work a treat...can't hurt but, as it stands, this is a cool thing already.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,825
Expert
|
|
Expert
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,825 |
Hi Deej,
Very good song, good lyrics and well mixed.
No room for an instrumental solo?
Best Regards
Nigel
Nigel Spiers
Christchurch, New Zealand
info@nzacoustics.com
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,888
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,888 |
Hi Deej,
Love this! You got your inspiration from Edgar Allan Poe I guess? Great idea, works really well.
Man, that vocal! Especially love the bridge.
Enjoyed!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 4,808
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 4,808 |
Keep at it, Deej, and soon everyone will be raven about it (couldn't help it). You know I like your voice so much that I'd listen to you sing the phone book. I really like the melody, and the band and mix are perfect. I've got nothing for ya to consider except I like Ray's suggestion to try other Styles. Not because the song needs it, but because it's fun AND it could inspire you to make a few changes --again, not that change is necessary. Next month I'll post the 3rd version of a song that will feature Ray on bass.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,462
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,462 |
Nice lyrics, I like the use of raven as the caller for liberation.
Really enjoyed the chord progression, especially the minor of verses and then the more major choruses. Catchy chorus.
Very strong vocal performance, very good work with the high notes and the backing vocals are tasty.
I don't have ideas for improvement, although reminds me of Aerosmith ballads, maybe stronger electric guitars in the chorus (+solo) might give some extra spice.
Janne
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,349
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,349 |
Deej...I can't really add much to what has already been said but I would like to reiterate some of it...my first impression is what a clever write and hook...E.A.P. would be flattered...secondly I agree with Marty and Ray's thought of trying other styles for fun and you did say you weren't quite sure if it's done yet or not...I know there have been times I've done that and found something I liked better...in fact after I get my chord structure into BiaB as a regular practice I play them through as many styles as I can in search of the "one" that enhances the lyrics the best.
BUT, you don't have to change a thing to make this a great song with a cool hook and a killer vocal (as usual)!
www.soundclick.com/firesongBiaB 2024, Steinberg Cubase Pro 13, Wavelab 11.2, SpetraLayers Pro 10, Audacity, Steinberg UR44 Interface, Yamaha Genos, Roland FP60 and FP10, Windows 10 You are who you are because you do what you do because of what you believe.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,045
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 24,045 |
DJ, if I were you I would be "raven" about this one!
This is one outstanding song.
Fantastic vocal, backing tracks, mix, and lyrics.
I wouldn't change a thing.
Loved it.
I'm in a fitness protection program. I'm been hiding from exercise.
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 2,060
Veteran
|
|
OP
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 2,060 |
Alan, James, Bob, Elliott, Floyd, B.D., Andi, rayc, Nigel, Dave, Marty, Janne, Dan, and Mario:
Thank you all for the listens and really helpful feedback. As you may have picked up, I wasn’t too sure about this and had mixed feelings about it . . . so your positive comments are encouraging. I’ve tweaked the mix a bit based on your comments.
One of the things I was concerned about was the abrupt start—that is, no intro. No one seemed to mind it, but I decided to add a short sound effect driven intro. I also added some beefier electric guitars into the chorus . . . and lastly, a cello. All of those those tracks are from the Doomsday style that rayc recommended. I think it all works, but I’m sure you’ll let me know if otherwise.
Some thoughts on the specific comments:
Floyd: Yeah, “esoteric” is a fair word for to describe the lyric . . . and I think that’s in part what has worried me . . . it’s not easily accessible , particularly with the Poe references. But hopefully the sound and melody compensate, and it resonates more on a further listen? Dunno.
Ray, Marty and Dan: So I did play with a number of additional styles following your comment. The Doomsday style with the cello was really cool . . . unfortunately for the verses, the chugging guitars didn’t really play the diminished chord so it wouldn’t work all the way through. But as noted above, I added the Thrash electric guitars into the chorus, and used the cello as well (with some restraint occasionally conflicted with the melody). Hopefully a good addition.
Nigel: Perhaps a function of my not being fully confident in the tune, I wanted to keep this short and sweet . . . under 3.5 minutes. Another reason I skipped the intro. But beyond that, I couldn’t find a natural place for one. The best option would have been before the bridge, but I thought that would take away from some of the song’s momentum. So, opted to do without. A good thought though.
Dave: I’m not sure I can honestly say it was inspired by Poe . . . that is, I didn't start writing the song with Poe in mind. I fell upon that opening line during my usual writing process . . . which is me strumming away on guitar while I mumble random nonsense until a line or phrase jumps out at me. But once I had the first line, I knew I wanted to incorporate more Poe elements . . . leading ultimately to the title of the song and the “tell tale heart” reference.
Janne: See above . . . stronger electrics in the chorus added . . . great suggestion!
Thanks again all . . . hope the changes are for the better.
Deej
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jan 2023
Posts: 2
Newbie
|
|
Newbie
Joined: Jan 2023
Posts: 2 |
The chord pattern is quite impressive, particularly in the chorus. Experience the captivating allure of the I - IV7 chord progression that is sure to capture your auditory senses. Experience the perfect combination of captivating lyrics, mesmerizing vocals, and flawless arrangement. Experience the joy of listening with our exceptional audio quality. Perfectly blended, as well.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 3,525
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 3,525 |
It all sounds good to me. No, that's wrong. It sounds great to me. Clever lyrics and use of Poe. Catchy chorus. Vocal is tops, as usual.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Mar 2018
Posts: 6,972
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Mar 2018
Posts: 6,972 |
Deej,
You are one of my favorite vocalists here. Never a disappointing experience. Actually, I liked this tune a lot. Probably would make first 3 top songs by you on my list. Excellent lyrics, vocal performance and arrangement. The "abrupt start" you mentioned did not bother me personally at all. However if you want an opinion, there might be an easy cheat/addition to make intro a bit more smooth. After the last "knock" consider a sliding note of a bass or other instrument that would lead into the tune. In any case amazing effort and thank you for sharing.
Misha.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 8,441
Veteran
|
|
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 8,441 |
Hey DJ,
Great song man. All of your stuff has a real classic old school radio vibe.
Love it..
Excellent production and vocals.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Band-in-a-Box 2026 Video: The Newly Designed Piano Roll Window
In this video, we explore the updated Piano Roll, complete with a modernized look and exciting new features. You’ll see new filtering options that make it easy to focus on specific note groups, smoother and more intuitive note entry and editing, and enhanced options for zooming, looping, and more.
Watch the video.
You can see all the 2026 videos on our forum!
Band-in-a-Box 2026 Video: AI Stems & Notes - split polyphonic audio into instruments and transcribe
This video demonstrates how to use the new AI-Notes feature together with the AI-Stems splitter, allowing you to select an audio file and have it separated into individual stems while transcribing each one to its own MIDI track. AI-Notes converts polyphonic audio—either full mixes or individual instruments—into MIDI that you can view in notation or play back instantly.
Watch the video.
You can see all the 2026 videos on our forum!
Bonus PAK and 49-PAK for Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®
With your version 2026 for Windows Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, Audiophile Edition or PlusPAK purchase, we'll include a Bonus PAK full of great new Add-ons for FREE! Or upgrade to the 2026 49-PAK for only $49 to receive even more NEW Add-ons including 20 additional RealTracks!
These PAKs are loaded with additional add-ons to supercharge your Band-in-a-Box®!
This Free Bonus PAK includes:
- The 2026 RealCombos Booster PAK:
-For Pro customers, this includes 27 new RealTracks and 23 new RealStyles.
-For MegaPAK customers, this includes 25 new RealTracks and 23 new RealStyles.
-For UltraPAK customers, this includes 12 new RealStyles.
- MIDI Styles Set 92: Look Ma! More MIDI 15: Latin Jazz
- MIDI SuperTracks Set 46: Piano & Organ
- Instrumental Studies Set 24: Groovin' Blues Soloing
- Artist Performance Set 19: Songs with Vocals 9
- Playable RealTracks Set 5
- RealDrums Stems Set 9: Cool Brushes
- SynthMaster Sounds Set 1 (with audio demos)
- Android Band-in-a-Box® App (included)
Looking for more great add-ons, then upgrade to the 2026 49-PAK for just $49 and you'll get:
- 20 Bonus Unreleased RealTracks and RealDrums with 20 RealStyle.
- FLAC Files (lossless audio files) for the 20 Bonus Unreleased RealTracks and RealDrums
- MIDI Styles Set 93: Look Ma! More MIDI 16: SynthMaster
- MIDI SuperTracks Set 47: More SynthMaster
- Instrumental Studies 25 - Soul Jazz Guitar Soloing
- Artist Performance Set 20: Songs with Vocals 10
- RealDrums Stems Set 10: Groovin' Sticks
- SynthMaster Sounds & Styles Set 2 (sounds & styles with audio demos)
Learn more about the Bonus PAKs for Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®!
Video: New User Interface (GUI)
Join Tobin as he takes you on a tour of the new user interface in Band-in-a-Box® 2026 for Windows®! This modern GUI redesign offers a sleek new look with updated toolbars, refreshed windows, and a smoother workflow. The brand-new side toolbar puts track selection, the MultiPicker Library, and other essential tools right at your fingertips. Plus, our upgraded Multi-View lets you layer multiple windows without overlap, giving you a highly flexible workspace. Many windows—including Tracks, Piano Roll, and more—have been redesigned for improved usability and a cleaner, more intuitive interface, and more!
Watch the video.
You can see all the 2026 videos on our forum!
Introducing XPro Styles PAK 10 – Now Available for Windows Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 10 for Windows & Mac Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 28 RealTracks and RealDrums!
Few things are certain in life: death, taxes, and a brand spankin’ new XPro Styles PAK! In this, the 10th edition of our XPro Styles PAK series, we’ve got 100 styles coming your way! We have the classic 25 styles each from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, and rounding out this volume's wildcard slot is 25 styles in the Praise & Worship genre! A wide spanning genre, you can find everything from rock, folk, country, and more underneath its umbrella. The included 28 RealTracks and RealDrums can be used with any Band-in-a-Box® 2026 (and higher) package.
Here’s just a small sampling of what you can look forward to in XPro Styles PAK 10: Soft indie folk worship songs, bumpin’ country boogies, gospel praise breaks, hard rockin’ pop, funky disco grooves, smooth Latin jazz pop, bossa nova fusion, western swing, alternative hip-hop, cool country funk, and much more!
Special offers until December 31st, 2025!
All the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 10 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea), or get them all in the XPro Styles PAK Bundle for only $149 (reg. $299)! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Video: XPro Styles PAK 10 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2025 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
Introducing Xtra Styles PAK 21 – Now Available for Windows Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!
Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Windows & Mac Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) is here with 200 brand new RealStyles!
We're excited to bring you our latest Xtra Styles PAK installment—the all new Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher)!
Rejoice, one and all, for Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box® is here! We’re serving up 200 brand spankin’ new styles to delight your musical taste buds! The first three courses are the classics you’ve come to know and love, including offerings from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, but, not to be outdone, this year’s fourth course is bro country! A wide ranging genre, you can find everything from hip-hop, uptempo outlaw country, hard hitting rock, funk, and even electronica, all with that familiar bro country flair. The dinner bell has been rung, pickup up Xtra Styles PAK 21 today!
In this PAK you’ll discover: Energetic folk rock, raucous train beats, fast country boogies, acid jazz grooves, laid-back funky jams, a bevy of breezy jazz waltzes, calm electro funk, indie synth pop, industrial synth metal, and more bro country than could possibly fit in the back of a pickup truck!
Special offers until December 31st, 2025!
All the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 21 are on special for only $29 each (reg $49), or get all 21 PAKs for $199 (reg $399)! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 21.
Video: Xtra Styles PAK 21 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 21 requires the 2025 or higher UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
Introducing XPro Styles PAK 10 – Now Available for Mac Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 10 for Mac & Windows Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 28 RealTracks and RealDrums!
Few things are certain in life: death, taxes, and a brand spankin’ new XPro Styles PAK! In this, the 10th edition of our XPro Styles PAK series, we’ve got 100 styles coming your way! We have the classic 25 styles each from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, and rounding out this volume's wildcard slot is 25 styles in the Praise & Worship genre! A wide spanning genre, you can find everything from rock, folk, country, and more underneath its umbrella. The included 28 RealTracks and RealDrums can be used with any Band-in-a-Box® 2026 (and higher) package.
Here’s just a small sampling of what you can look forward to in XPro Styles PAK 10: Soft indie folk worship songs, bumpin’ country boogies, gospel praise breaks, hard rockin’ pop, funky disco grooves, smooth Latin jazz pop, bossa nova fusion, western swing, alternative hip-hop, cool country funk, and much more!
Special offers until December 31st, 2025!
All the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 10 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea), or get them all in the XPro Styles PAK Bundle for only $149 (reg. $299)! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Video: XPro Styles PAK 10 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2025 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Forums57
Topics85,365
Posts791,287
Members39,862
| |
Most Online25,754
Jan 24th, 2025
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Dansk
Deutsch - Windows
Español
Français - Windows
Italiano - Windows
Nederlands
Polski
Português
Svenskt
русский
Japanese
Simplified Chinese
Traditional Chinese
Korean