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Thanks to anyone who can help me with a few new lines for my song-It's Cold Outside-
When the audience goes "how cold is it" I go on a rant. Please help with some new lines-
I'll buy the drinks for the best ones-
Here's what I have so far-
Answer-It's so cold -you don't have to hold your breath to turn blue..
-you get excited whenever you can see bare ground.
-you have to wear spikes on your shoes and you're not a golfer.
-blocks of snow are used as building materials
-the back porch on your house doubles as a freezer
-snowmen are counted in the census.
-you have more miles on your snowblower than your car.
-you get more excited about a trip to Canadian tire than spending quality time with your wife.
-your municipality has a bigger budget for it's Zamboni fleet than it's fire dept.
-when you see a dog pee on a tree and he sticks to it
-when even the squirrels nuts are frozen
Last edited by edbulmer; 12/09/10 07:05 PM.
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It's so cold my can of beer is stuck to my tongue ....
It's so cold my double double is an ice cap..
It's so cold I brought my beer in from the garage (Rharv said that I think)
It's so the tree's sap is snappin' (If you ever lived north of Superior (I did for 12 years) this happens and about scares the crap out of you for the first few months)
It's so cold I had to leave the car running overnight...(another Northern Ontario thing, we kept the trucks running from November to March...never shut them off........)
It's so cold the ice on the two holer seat is stuck to my ........(happened to me...)
It's so cold we are heating the heating oil... (I had an electric blanket around the kero tank (100 gals) on the side of the house in Cochrane...)
It's so cold my hand-warmer froze shut. (An old handwarmer from the 60's had a charcoal stick inside a metal box like a cigarette box, that had a velour covering, you lit the stick and it burned for 2 hours, if you put in 2 for 4 to 5 hours...very handy when it's -60F)
It's so cold I shot a yellow icicle at a tree...(true story it was -67F that day just south of James Bay)
_______________________________________________________
Thanks for the memories Ed.
I have a heating blanket thing on my side of the bed, I freeze all the time now, and it's not even really cold here.....though we did get 4 feet of snow this week, 6 feet just a few miles north....
I feel like I'm Sam McGee re-incarnated, cremate me, maybe that will warm me up.....
I sure as heck banged the sides out life on the way down the tube.......wish I was at our cabin again, but it's no place for old men....
John Conley
Musica est vita
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So cold we had to thaw our words over the fire to hold a conversation
I do not work here, but the benefits are still awesome
Make your sound your own!
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Apprentice
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It's so cold I saw a lawyer with his hands in his OWN pockets!
- Bud
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It's so cold the polar bears came knocking on my door asking for shelter
It's so cold my denture chatters in it's cup on the night table
It's so cold you realize there are two kinds of snowballs
Last edited by Mike sings; 12/10/10 12:09 PM.
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The ones I've always heard are:
- Colder than a "ho's" heart.
- Colder than a nun's kiss.
(no offense meant here)
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It's so cold I had to bring the brass monkey inside
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John I hear ya. I've been in some cold places. One time a guy ran across the street and his lungs froze.
Thanks for those guys they are great. Bob that was great. Rubberball-awesome.
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i'm thinkin', i'm thinkin'
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Citaat:
i'm thinkin', i'm thinkin'
Don't hurt yourself, Don!
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It's so cold my dog is sniffing his own butt while hoping the methane will ignite!
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It's so cold.....
" How cold is it? "
Just look at the flippin' thermometer will ya?
Last edited by Mike sings; 12/10/10 04:29 PM.
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"Colder'n' a well diggers *ss in Idaho!" was a favourite expression of a mate of mine from Oklahoma. Nb. he shared this with me during our time in Bible School...
John
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It's so cold there's a brass monkey outside looking for a welder
Cheers,
Keith
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Johm, Quote:
"Colder'n' a well diggers *ss
We had that one too. And "colder than a witches t*t", and of course the brass monkey.
To add in a little confusion, we combined the three phrases into "Colder than a witch diggers brass monkey".
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Some old USAF crew metaphors comin' atcha:
*Colder than my ex-wife's heart.
*So cold I found a little transluent bronze ball inside my shorts, but when I went to show it to others, it warmed up and there was a "SPROONT" sound followed by a disagreeable odor - and the little bronze ball disappeared.
*Colder than the commander's heart.
*So cold that the penguins came knockin'...
*Cold enough to turn the beer to whiskey. (This one is actually true, Thule, Greenland, you could set the beer outside the door and in a few minutes pour off just the alcohol as the water conent had frozen solid. Cheap buzz.)
Those are the only ones that might make it in mixed company...
--Mac
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It's so cold we can't remember the last time we heard from Al Gore.
Later,
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It's so cold the polar bear sat on a snow hill & got polaroids
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John Conley
Musica est vita
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Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
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Band-in-a-Box 2026 Video: AI Stems & Notes - split polyphonic audio into instruments and transcribe
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We've just released XPro Styles PAK 10 for Mac & Windows Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 28 RealTracks and RealDrums!
Few things are certain in life: death, taxes, and a brand spankin’ new XPro Styles PAK! In this, the 10th edition of our XPro Styles PAK series, we’ve got 100 styles coming your way! We have the classic 25 styles each from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, and rounding out this volume's wildcard slot is 25 styles in the Praise & Worship genre! A wide spanning genre, you can find everything from rock, folk, country, and more underneath its umbrella. The included 28 RealTracks and RealDrums can be used with any Band-in-a-Box® 2026 (and higher) package.
Here’s just a small sampling of what you can look forward to in XPro Styles PAK 10: Soft indie folk worship songs, bumpin’ country boogies, gospel praise breaks, hard rockin’ pop, funky disco grooves, smooth Latin jazz pop, bossa nova fusion, western swing, alternative hip-hop, cool country funk, and much more!
Special offers until December 31st, 2025!
All the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 10 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea), or get them all in the XPro Styles PAK Bundle for only $149 (reg. $299)! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Video: XPro Styles PAK 10 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2025 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
Introducing Xtra Styles PAK 21 – Now Available for Mac Band-in-a-Box 2025 and Higher!
Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Mac & Windows Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher) is here with 200 brand new RealStyles!
We're excited to bring you our latest Xtra Styles PAK installment—the all new Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box version 2025 (and higher)!
Rejoice, one and all, for Xtra Styles PAK 21 for Band-in-a-Box® is here! We’re serving up 200 brand spankin’ new styles to delight your musical taste buds! The first three courses are the classics you’ve come to know and love, including offerings from the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, but, not to be outdone, this year’s fourth course is bro country! A wide ranging genre, you can find everything from hip-hop, uptempo outlaw country, hard hitting rock, funk, and even electronica, all with that familiar bro country flair. The dinner bell has been rung, pickup up Xtra Styles PAK 21 today!
In this PAK you’ll discover: Energetic folk rock, raucous train beats, fast country boogies, acid jazz grooves, laid-back funky jams, a bevy of breezy jazz waltzes, calm electro funk, indie synth pop, industrial synth metal, and more bro country than could possibly fit in the back of a pickup truck!
Special offers until December 31st, 2025!
All the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 21 are on special for only $29 each (reg $49), or get all 21 PAKs for $199 (reg $399)! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 21.
Video: Xtra Styles PAK 21 Overview & Styles Demos: Watch now!
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 21 requires the 2025 or higher UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
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